Containment What If?

What if the fire actually cleaned off the hoard, and nothing else?

Like, it reverted itself to it's quality in the interior like the first day Bob and Barb purchased the house?
 
Christory101 said:
Speaking of Tomgirl, a rather effective disguise would be an Islamic hijab,specifically, the kind worn in Saudi Arabia...

As long as he didn't speak too much, people might not suspect it was him.

Though they may wonder what a single saudi woman is doing hanging out in a video game/pokemon store and screaming at everyone!
Knowing Chris, he'd likely get a hijab that looks like one of his striped shirts.

Also, all that fabric can't cover up the smell
 
hurpdurpmanguy said:
What if the fire actually cleaned off the hoard, and nothing else?

Like, it reverted itself to it's quality in the interior like the first day Bob and Barb purchased the house?

Likely barb would go out and buy more crap to replace the void. I was under the impression that that's what hoarders do if they are deprived of their stuff
 
@ God - Fri Jan 17, 2014 1:36 am
AssBlasters Productions presents: Sonichu

@ A-№1 - Fri Jan 17, 2014 1:37 am
@ God, Go and Ass Blast to the EXTREME!

@ God - Fri Jan 17, 2014 1:38 am
IT'S NOT HOWMOW IF THE SONICHU BALLS DON'T TOUCH.
 
There are some possible niches.Domination/humiliation type stuff would be an obvious one. Unfortunately for Chris, this probably wouldn't involve him getting laid, just having attractive women laughing at his bent duck.

The other would be the "celebrity" route. There's one porn star whose name I forget, but she was in the first series of Big Brother UK. Looks-wise, she is, to put it politely, not conventionally pretty. However, she's built her career on the back of her minor early-2000s celebrity. Octomom, Tila Tequila and even the dude who played Screech in Saved By The Bell have done sex tapes - it's not that people necessarily want to see them in the throes of passion, more that they're curious to see a famous person doing something incredibly private. Chris' fame is probably too niche for him to make big bucks, and most of his most private moments are already on general release, but you never know.

And there are occasional videos that mostly exist so that the viewers can laugh at the weird/hideous/poorly-endowed star, which is probably Chris' best shot.
 
He'd wear a literally paper-thin disguise and drive over in SON-CHU. Once inside, he'd ask loudly about the trolling conspiracy and go on about what a great guy Chrissnwessnchanler is while the staff discreetly call the Jerkops. Then he'd attempt to dramatically rip his disguise off to reveal his subterfuge, only to trip over, fall backwards into a display of Hexbawxes and lie on the floor while the scent of DIRTY CRAPPED BRIEFS fills the store.

Then Barb would threaten to sue.
 
If that happened, then it would turn out that all Chris' paranoid fantasies were true, and we'd look pretty stupid.
 
Keurig would consult with their evil paymasters Megan, Snyder and Mary Lee Walsh and then throw hot coffee all over Chris. This would provoke Chris into unleashing a CURSE-YE-HA-ME-HA, which would not only destroy the Keurig building, but every Keurig coffee maker in the world. Chris would then once again be celebrated as a hero the world over. The end.
 
Re: His first reaction if he saw Sonichu alive in the real w

They'd hang out for a while until Chris did something stupid and revolting, causing Sonichu to abandon him in disgust.
 
[quote="GrandNumberOfPounds"}If I ran a workshop for disabled people, sure, there are people far worse than him who can work and be productive. I know a job coach with Goodwill and she's had clients who have needed to be told to take a shower before coming to work and not to touch their coworkers, so people like Chris work all the time with some accommodations.[/quote]

Except that Chris also hates the slow-in-the-minds.

Basically, there's nothing you could hire Chris to do. Even if you gave him a job so simple that even he couldn't fuck it up, his attitude would wreck things. He'd put in the bare minimum of effort and blow up the moment you attempted to discipline him.
 
CrusaderKing said:
What if Chris were a viking? Like, back when vikings were actually a thing?
They mostly live in Minnesota.

What if the fire had burned of all of Chris's hair?
 
Past-Chris would plan to hit on the beautiful wife that he believes Present-Chris must have, and demand a cut of the billions he must have made. Present Chris would in turn lie about the degree of success he has had. Present-Chris would accuse Past-Chris of causing STRESS and shit himself, introducing hoard-germs into a time period that was not ready for them. The plague would race through humanity killing, among 90% of the population, Snyder, Rocky, Barb and Clyde Cash. Present-Chris' past would thus be erased, making him a walking paradox. Wherever he goes, causality ceases to function and linearity has no meaning. Eventually, the space-time continuum itself unravels and disappears with a lingering echo of "DANG DIRTY TRO-O-O-OLLS...."

Or, Chris would shit himself and do nothing.
 
May be slightly better due to not seeing any of horrible artwork, but that's not saying much.

And it might have more chapters due to how Sonichu is done faster written than being drawn.
 
Megan would laugh a cruel, German laugh and attempt to destroy Chris with her Sailor Megtune powers, having forgotten that Chris stripped those from her. Chris would then knock her flying with a CURSE-YE-HA-ME-HA, rendering her unconscious.

Then, rape.
 
He would probably blame Michael Snyder later in his next events.

And probably the newest one: Sarah Hammer.
 
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