Containment What If?

[Lipitor]

What if Howard Stern was able to interview Chris?

 

[Apocalypso]

What if Howard Stern was able to interview Chris?

There'd be one hell of a roast.

What if Yucko the Clown interviewed Chris and insulted him non-stop?

Spoiler

 

[Stud2Stud]

What if instead of Chris sending glitter in an envelope to SEGA HQ, he sent a bag of dicks?

http://dicksbymail.com

I think noone would have figured out what the heck he was going on in his smug rant thereafter.
And the forums would have exploded with insane speculation about the nature of the statement "I send them a bag of UGLY JELLY GROWTHS"

 

[Haesindang Park]

What if Chris has a Realdoll?

 

[Morbid Boredom]

What if Chris has a Realdoll?

A/K/A the best case scenario.

 

[LiquidCooledGonads]

What if Chris had Crystal but she came out with blue arms?

They would be amputated.

 

[GS 281]

What if Chris has a Realdoll?

He would still come with

 

[Tsukiko]

What if Chris stayed noided?

An' anudder thing - FLATLANDER AND ZACH ARE ANGRY AT ME! I WANT THAT DANG LEAK OF MY ALBUM OFFA THE INNERNET NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW!

 

[Mr. Needful]

What if Chris has a Realdoll?

He would be the Levelupqueen model, featuring Goodwill dress.

 

[MrJakeTerror]

What if Yucko the Clown interviewed Chris and insulted him non-stop?

I know this is a pretty commonplace thing to say here, but seeing how Chris is when it comes to face to face interaction, I would say SHIT. HIS. PANTS. AND. DO. NOTHING.

What if Chris had a Million Dollars?

 

[DrunkTails]

I know this is a pretty commonplace thing to say here, but seeing how Chris is when it comes to face to face interaction, I would say SHIT. HIS. PANTS. AND. DO. NOTHING.

What if Chris had a Million Dollars?

Waste them on legos.

 

[Konstantinos]

What if Chris has a Realdoll?

What if Chris was a real doll?

 

[DrunkTails]

What if Chris was a real doll?

Who would want to buy a cwc doll?

 

[LiquidCooledGonads]

What if Chris was a real doll?

DON'T GIVE /D/ IDEAS.

 

[MrJakeTerror]

What if Chris had no beef with males?

 

[Abethedemon]

What if Chris had no beef with males?

He might be an MRA, or even be metrosexual. On the other hand, he could be even more homophobic because he believes that every woman would find a man.

 

[Apocalypso]

What if this happened to Chris?

 

[SOINCHU]

What if Chris was hired as the lead role of John Matrix in a remake of Commando? (1985, Arnold Schwarzenegger) I imagine the mall scene would be something to behold.

 

[Tsukiko]

What if Chris did the audio readings for Wikpiedia articles? Would they use his readings?

Debate raged for months on whether or not this obviously autotuned joke reading (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Bhutanese_Passport-1.ogg) was done by a genuine Bhutanese Dzongkha speaker or not. Nobody could verify whether or not that's what a Bhutanese accent sounds like (hint: it isn't). If they considered allowing that, surely Chris's Ruckersvillian drawl shouldn't be an issue.

 

[Ho Mo for Women]

What if Chris was the Pope?