Containment What If?

Xaiena said:
What if Chris wrote Sonichu without the influence of trolls? I'm curious as to what direction it would have gone.
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The comics will be more on Sonichu and less on Chris. But there will be sub-plots about Chris too. So, same thing as the first Sonichu comics.
 
CatParty said:
chris is a shrek
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Dawg, Dats what I said!, Nah but seriously think about it, Anna is Fiona. Pretty red head, who falls for him, then instead of turning into an Ogre at the end, she morphs into a Barb like form. Sonichu= Donkey, Clyde Cash and Mary Lee Walsh are the villains, Mary is depicted as a witch. Someone needs to do a Shrek/Chris photoshop!
 
If Chris is Shrek, Bluespike could be Rumpelstiltskin.
 
Sakamoto said:
Maybe a Cinderella type story.

Chris is trapped in his home by the wicked Snorlax and his cruel step-sisters the hoard. He wishes on a star and Sonichu appears, giving him a magic sports bra which transforms Chris into a tomgirl, and his non-working Ford Escort is transformed into a pink Carmen Gia, so Chris is able to go to the Royal Mall and have a chance to meet a boyfriend-free girl. But Sonichu warns him that he must return before the McDonalds drive-thru closes.

At the Royal Mall, tomgirl Chris dances with himself to attract a handsome boyfriend-free girl, and catches the attention of Princess China. She invites him in to PacSun and he tries on some bikinis. While he's in the changing room the alarm on his cell phone goes off to warn him time is almost up, so he rushes off, leaving his sports bra behind. He barely makes through the McDonalds drive-thru in time to order some healthy McWraps and gets home as the Carmen Gia transforms back into the worthless Son-chu and his fancy tomgirl clothes and makeup fade away, leaving him looking the way he really looks these days.

Princess China posts on Facebook that she wants to have hot monkey sex with the owner of the sports bra, and all the tomgirls and tomboys of Virgina post replies, each claiming that they are the true and honest owner. So they all come to the Royal Mall and try on the sweat stained sports bra, but it's way too huge to fit any of them. Princess China sighs. Then she notices Chris off in the food court playing video games and avoiding eye contact. She asks Chris to try on the sports bra, and it fits perfectly. Then the Pickle-man shows up and Princess China runs off with him.

The End.
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May I have the movie rights sir. Not even Cole Smithy could give it a bad review.
 
Lets ponder what would happen if Snorlax stops bluffing and actually locks OPL out of Chez Chandler. :o
 
Barb will only lock Chris out until she gets a hankerin' for some q-sands. Then its all "Crisschun mah behbeh dawlin' bah gettemama got dern san'wish"
 
Pikonic said:
May I have the movie rights sir. Not even Cole Smithy could give it a bad review.
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Go out and zap to the extreme.

Totally empty threat as Barb wouldn't know how to change locks and is too cheap and lazy to buy new locks or hire someone. Plus, Chris legally resides there and can't just be tossed out without due process (not that either Barb nor Chris are smart enough to realize that).

But just for the sake of "what if"
Chris would bang on the door and whine for several hours, then would probably go to McDonald's for a while before coming back to repeat the process. When he became desperate enough he might try to break in. Failing that, he would continue to stay in the area whining and banging on the door and being a pest until Barb gives in or he become the local homeless transvestite that digs through dumpsters for scraps of fast food. He would never consider trying to start a new life because that's too hard. He probably couldn't find any of his relatives' houses on his own and the family doesn't seem close enough that he'd be welcome anyway.
 
Sakamoto said:
Plus, Chris legally resides there and can't just be tossed out without due process (not that either Barb nor Chris are smart enough to realize that).
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I don't think that's actually the case. I think Barb owns the house. (or it's her name on the mortgage) Chris is in the same position any other adult child would be in.
 
Wouldn't Borb be left alone and trapped in the hoard with no one to take care of her? I don't think she'll lock Goldilocks out, he's her primary caregiver! Holey buttocks indeed. (BTW, does she have a fistula? He implied more than the ordinary number of buttholes.)
 
I think Chris inherited his ability to talk a big game from Barb. So I don't even think it would ever come down to her actually locking him out- more so since she's too lazy to get anything herself. However, if it did, I'd see him just living out of his car in the Walmart parking lot and spending all day in there.

Now if the Blob really wanted to play the ultimate bitch card, she should take all his cards from his wallet (debit, credit, bank card, whatever) and then change the locks. Seeing as no one other than her ever checks on OPL, she could keep collecting his tugboat for all the q-sands and Goodwill shopping sprees she ever wanted while he slowly goes feral living behind the first McDonald's he finds.
 
Like everyone else I voted for "cry till she lets him back in". I think she'd make Chris apologize at length and make all kinds of promises about how he'll never leave her again. And she'd probably make him say weird possessive things like "MOMMY LOVES ME MORE THAN ANYONE" through the door before she opened it.
 
Well, in a way his life now is like a fairytale.
He's a tomgirl princess locked away in the hoard of a mighty :snorlax: dragon! Awaiting the day when a young, beautiful warrior woman comes and rescues him so he can live happily as a loving househusband and father to a daughter named after an illustrious metal! *yawn*
 
He wakes up tomorrow morning, and time has reversed, a la the end of Jumanji...he's a freshman, and back at the high school where he "fit in perfectly". He still has every memory that led up to the end of August 1, 2013, though, complete with all of his paranoid delusions.

Would he be warier of other men? Would he more aggressively pursue the girls he never tried to date? Would he (haha) still make the Honor Roll?
 
Well it'd probably make his heart level :heart-empty: because his old gal pals wouldn't talk to him due to all his whining and/or creepy unwanted advances
 
And he promptly either gets expelled for trying to molest all the old gal-pals or moved into the truly slow-in-da-mind classes because he won't stop raving about troll conspiracies.

Or maybe he'll try that much harder in art so he can get all the awards he was so cruelly denied- oh who the hell am I kidding. It's my first option.
 
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