What is your relationship with your dad?

Honestly, pretty great. My father is the hardest working, most dedicated man I have ever known and I genuinely don't think I could respect another man more than I do him. It's honestly hard to respect other men due to how high he set the bar. His life was was filled with hardship and struggle from growing up in poverty, having a pretty poor education, working back breaking labor for decades dealing with the absolute scum of society, just to support the family, and even with all of that he still made sure to let us know just how much he loved us.

He had some anger issues due to all of the bs he had to go through, and we butted heads a lot when I was younger, as we are both very stubborn and argumentative (Something I got entirely from him lol), but even through it all he never physically abused me, my siblings, or my mother, and as an adult I've learned to understand the things he went through. My biggest fear is that I might never be able to be half the man he is, but if someday I am that'll make me 10 times the man most other guys are these days.
 
Also pretty good although I find his interests cringe cause hes a boomer and I have to regulate him from embarrassing me in public by saying stuff like "Do you know those Jews control the corporations and made the vaccines, a guy at work said so. Jeff Bezos and Bill Gates are Jews." (He doesnt know what Judaism is or who Jews are, he just knows Hitler did something bad in the 20th century cause its mandatory middle school reading around the world)
 
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High functioning and intelligent criminal. Astonishing to watch him with normies who would refuse to believe he's not a nice or well intentioned man. Normies don't want to know, that's why they are normies but I didn't know that growing up. You also come to learn that the police lie and lie all the time, especially under oath.

Drank himself under during the pandemic. About the size, speed and rage of Mike Tyson shrunk down to a toothless little husk of hepatic encephalopathy that could not even move his own blanket. I did drop in to mock him because damn if it wasn't funny to see what kind of a toll being a retard who abuses everyone and everything takes 'someday' and someday finally came. He certainly wasn't black but still found a way to be an honorary nigger in every way with the exception of ever doing time. I was able to call him a faggot for 'ordering up' on account of the non-stop lactulose enemas and ass play that hospitals give to drunks before they die. Best kind of therapy there is really.
 
Despite having had terrible friends that have plunged him into alcoholism early in his life (to the point it had significantly weakened him physically by the time he had me), he was the only mentally stable family member I had. He also was unbelievably wise, and taught me so many things and values I uphold to this day. Even though he couldn't do much beyond physically beyond moving around his house, read, drink and watch documentary channels all day, he did his very best to be a good father and protect me and my brothers whenever it was necessary.

He ended up being great at it despite his issues instead. I wish I didn't forget some of the things he told me, or be more present around him, but what can you do, I was young then. I still keep a photo of him in my home.
 
Growing up, abusive (not sexually, thankfully), growing up knowing you're not the favorite son and getting punished for things that your younger siblings also do but is excused because they are younger, only by 2 years though. He got to his 60's and then decided to be nice. Truly believes I've forgotten how he treated me as a kid because it was so long ago. I play along but the resentment is still there. Adult me knows this is a man who beat a 5 year old kid hard many times.
 
Throughout my childhood, he was a demeaning, insecure, controlling, verbally abusive creature of sorts who took a disproportionate amount of pride for what little he had contributed to the household. Not only he never protected or advocated for me as a child in any way, in some wierd Freudian sense he saw me as a competitor for my mother's attention, a thing I really wish I had a little less of. Despite my mom trying to convince me otherwise, there is little reason to doubt the fact that he hated me, or at least hated how I made him look in comparison. Of course, all of this is a lot more complicated and nuanced but this is the gist of it.

Yesterday when visiting he got extremely drunk, fell from the sofa, and pissed himself on the spot, while me, my mom and brother watched in disgust and disbelief. Even his own father (from whom he inherited his alcoholism by the way) can't look him in the eyes anymore.

What sort of a relationship should I have, kiwibros?
 
Some wannabe "artist" who was into weed and bohemian girls, got checks from his ma, and didn't find me until I was a late teen; TF do you think my relationship with him was?? He was a pretentious dick who thought my art sucked.
I miss my gramps and step-dad, though. They molded me into a good kiwi.
 
He's been dead over a decade. I take after him way more than the egg donor though, which is better than the alternative.

He's also where I got the 'tism from, though he never got diagnosed (and sounds like he wasn't interested in pursuing it).
 
In my case it's a double-edged sword. On the one hand, my dad IS in my life, he's actually taught me a lot of things that I still keep in mind today, and he and I both keep in touch with each other often. On the other, he wasn't at home during childhood, and his main "occupation" was, and still is, as a..... *sigh* ..... "music producer". As in, he makes beats (or instrumentals, if you wanna get fancy) for all of the Soundcloud rappers and the like. Whenever we get to chatting about his endeavors and how "HE'S TOTALLY MAKING IT, SON, TRUST ME" I just sigh inwardly and say to myself, "well, at least he isn't in prison, or dealing drugs". Now, it's great that he has a passion, but at the same time, you gotta have something to supplement that, y'know? Something that actually pays the bills. He knows his way around computers (which is partly how I got onto the career path I'm on today), so I suggested that he get a few IT certs and actually find a good-paying job to do and do his "beats" on the side. Dad, I'm sorry to say, still has his head in the clouds, and well, let's just say I'm not looking forward to when he inevitably crashes down to earth....
 
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