When is it okay to hate your dad?

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skykiii said:
I don't wanna make this topic all about me, so I'll stick to just one example: my own dad was a libtard. Is okay to hate him now, or did I just walk into a counter-stereotype that I only became conservative to spite daddy?
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Politically disagreeing with your parents is fine, but it’s weird to hate them over it. I think it’s never okay to hate your parents. Even in the most extreme situations, where your parents are doing great evil to you or someone else. You should, instead, desire that they turn away from that evil and repent. By hating them, you end up giving them even more power over you than you realize.
 
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Are we talking "Man I fucking hate brussels sprouts" kind of hate or shrieking rage kind of hate? Because the first is fine, but the second is self-destructive. I think with parent/children relationships there can be a lot of friction when the child realizes their parents are retarded and therefore that as a child they were scammed. The gods of your youth turn out to be mediocre or shitty people and you have to reconcile that you were the dupe in the relationship.
 
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skykiii said:
I don't wanna make this topic all about me, so I'll stick to just one example: my own dad
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lel

Anyway, if you're an adult, hating your parent(s) is fucking childish. Grow up. Yes they're probably flawed but they also could have dropped your ass in a dumpster and been done with you, but they got your dumb ass to adulthood so count that as a win. You are your own person and can make whatever choices you want to make now, so you have nobody to blame but yourself.

If you're a child, hating your parents is childish and you will grow up in time, but in the meantime get off of Kiwifarms dude, you're a kid. You shouldn't be here.

Also, yes there are shitty parents in the world but lets not forget there are also shitty kids. Kids with every opportunity in the world who just grow up as entitled little shits no matter how they were raised.

choices.webp
 
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The only time I think it's acceptable for one to dislike own's parent is if they were actually abusive. Other than that, many hate towards fathers comes from a "Don't tell me what to do" and to seethe at them over petty stuff is always stupid.
 
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Made In Lovely Kin said:
The only time I think it's acceptable for one to dislike own's parent is if they were actually abusive. Other than that, many hate towards fathers comes from a "Don't tell me what to do" and to seethe at them over petty stuff is always stupid.
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Correct. Without going too deep in my powerlevel, my hatred for my dad is due to his neglect toward me as a kid, being a drunk piece of shit along with all the mental and verbal abuse I endured and saw others endure because of him. He wasn't against using physical force if he felt justified in doing so such as forcing my mom out of the house and barricading the doors with wooden beams to keep her out. He would always operate with threats of "if you don't do X within Y, you will get Z consequence" For example, he ripped the head of my younger sibling's smurf doll in front of her to "discipline" her for misbehaving. He would also make the threat that he would slam his sledgehammer through my Sega Genesis if I didn't behave.

Unfortunately, the time I spent with him irrevocably fucked my mind up. It was only within the last few years that I did realize some of the shit I went through with him was fucked up and not normal coming from a parent. I finally realized my mental health issues were directly linked to the sort of "regime of terror" he made me go through.

For example, I was 10 years old when I had a bike accident and I broke my right arm. Initially, my dad said it was just swollen and put ice on it. Several days later, I still lost any control of my arm and my mom had to insist to take me to the ER and sure enough, the doc confirmed I had a broken arm. A few years later, I got 4 fractures in my left ankle. Same song and dance of "it's just swollen" coming from dad. After spending several days going around the house on a fucking mechanic's bench and asking to be taken to the hospital, he finally relented and I was proven right yet again. I asked him why he took so long both times to take me to the hospital and he replied he "hated it there". And then, one random night, the same sibling from earlier ran into a patio door she didn't see. Guess what happened? Dad sobered up in a nanosecond and took my sister straight to the hospital to get stitches. Why didn't I get this level of urgency from him the times I got broken limbs? Who knows? Beer and TV are more important.

He was absent in my life for the largest part of it. He never tried to do activities with me, let alone his other kids. He would shit on my interests of computers and videogames by actively trying to limit my usage with bullshit excuses like "your goddamn fucking SNES emulator is fucking the computer again" but guess who he called whenever his computer fucked up to fix it? Me.

The very last thing I remember we did together was playing 3D Space Cadet Pinball trying to topple each other's scores. That's how long it's been. We never spent time together as father and son since the past 30 or so years ago. As an adult, I try to propose him things like fishing trips to bond as father and son but every-fucking-time, he would turn me away wanting to be alone. He would ask me sometimes why would I never call him to talk. It's because he never actually took the time to listen to me and comfort me when I needed his support. He never took my mental health issues seriously until the smurf sister I mentioned earlier also started developing mental health issues. He would always tell me to "make a man" out of myself and that was supposed to be a cure-all of all my worries and problems.

Sorry for the wall of text but I thought the context was needed to paint a clear image of my position. Yes, I resent my dad and have cut him out of my life. All I wanted/needed was for recognize he was a fuck-up and I wanted an apology about it. Problem is that my dad is the most prideful piece of shit I ever had the displeasure to know. He would rather slit his own throat than ever admit a wrong even when he clearly is at fault. "My way or the highway" was his motto and he clearly had no second thoughts of threatening to send me to reform school when I was a kid to discipline me.

Why take your responsibility and be a parent when your kid is a cunt? Just send him to reform school to possibly get molested. That should fix him.
 
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Politics is such a gay reason to hate someone so close to you. There are so many worse things in the world than disagreement. I know a guy whose dad was outed as a pedophile after getting caught taking pics of girls in public. That dude has a pretty good reason to hate his dad.
 
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You shouldn't be hating relatives because of politics. Politics divides people and it's horrible how many relationships are ruined over something so stupid.

Hate is a very strong word that people tend to use too lightly. There are some very real reasons to hate a parent. But political leanings shouldn't be one of them. Your life is much shorter than you realise and you don't want to part on bad terms because of something like politics.

As for where the line is drawn? If your parents are truly scum of the Earth and you have suffered greatly for this, then I think hate is not unreasonable. However, I don't think we should betaking hating people lightly. Really think about it before you throw the term around.
 
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I’m disappointed the thread hasn’t come up with the correct answer yet:

The only time it’s okay to hate your dad is if you’re a smoking-hot girl. Chicks with daddy issues are always popular.
 
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Minor PL but I kinda hate mine because he went absentee early on. Nothing about the actual leaving, everything about not properly conveying family medical history on his side because there's some absolute fucking landmines in there in regards to medicine allergy and one of them almost got me killed.
 
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I am actually happy this thread went from "hey lets pretend Skykiii actually does hate his dad over politics and that wasn't just a flippant example!" to people actually discussing serious issues.
 
The sovereignty the father holds in the family just by natural law must be respected, but you know with great power comes great responsibility and blah blah. If your father truly neglected his role in your life then that can be contemptable. But that really depends on your situation and how clearly you're able to look at it without any emotional bias you might have. I had a pretty shit dad, anger issues out the ass, political sperg and only spoke to me to debate me on dumb shit since i was like 6, didn't want to even be a dad and i could tell at a very young age, BUT that motherfucker put his nose to grindstone and pulled us out of poverty. That dude WORKED and he stuck around. I am thankful that he is such a simp for my psychotic mother (she deserves it tbh) I am grateful for all that he did every day.
It just would have been cool to like, play catch or something with him also.
So idk, is your dad at least a little redeemable? They go through a lot too.
 
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