Who's the worst poet?

[Monolith]

William McGonagall is the obvious choice, but I doubt he's quite the worst ever. Any other candidates?

Edit: The worst published poet. I'm terrible at poetry too.

 

[Corrugated Daffodils]

Me.

 

[Positron]

Any feminist "poet".

 

[8777BB5]

My Sophomore Language Arts Teacher

 

[Hell0]

i feel like tom hanks wouldn't be a good poet, so him.

 

[Memeneeto]

Any feminist "poet".

Extend that to all "slam" poets.

 

[ES 148]

King Kong.

 

[Coconut Gun]

Every poet, because poetry is fucking gay and lame. Who needs that shit when we have video games?

 

[Red Hood]

Pick anyone that's written lyrics for a top 40 Pop, Country, or "Urban" song in the past 15 years.

 

[Toucan]

Sylvia Plath. She deserves a roast.... Oh wait.

 

[Broseph Stalin]

Rupi Kaur. Who is she, you might ask? Well, buckle the fuck up, ol' Papa Broseph is gonna take this thread for a ride.

So this chick is a (in)famous "InstaPoet", which is basically someone that wrote poetry and put it on Instagram. 25 year old Canadian Rupi Kaur made such beautifully written works such as:

Spoiler: NSFW

Yeah. It's all pretty basic shit that sounds more like motivational quotes or some kind of New Age dribble. The lack of capitalization doesn't really bother me though, mainly because back in college I fell in love with Lucille Clifton who did the same thing (And also wrote FAAAAAAARRR better poetry)

And what's worse? THIS BITCH BECAME A FUCKING BEST SELLING POET.

https://www.prnewswire.com/news-rel...-kaur-reach-one-million-copies-300399800.html

Not trying to get political or anything, but Rupi Kaur is all the proof we need of literary decline. Here's her wikipedia page if anyone wants to give it a glance over. She's potential lolcow material, IMO.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rupi_Kaur

 

[MW 002]

The majority of poets in “Poetry is Dead”- a feminist poetry magazine that tries way too hard and publishes poets who can’t write worth a dime.

https://www.poetryisdead.ca/

I’ve come to learn to stay far away from any literature magazine that pushes LGBT shit everywhere.

 

[AnOminous]

There are certainly less talented poets, but none so maddenishly gorpy and glurgy as Rod McKuen.

 

[MW 002]

Rupi Kaur. Who is she, you might ask? Well, buckle the fuck up, ol' Papa Broseph is gonna take this thread for a ride.

So this chick is a (in)famous "InstaPoet", which is basically someone that wrote poetry and put it on Instagram. 25 year old Canadian Rupi Kaur made such beautifully written works such as:

Spoiler: NSFW

Yeah. It's all pretty basic shit that sounds more like motivational quotes or some kind of New Age dribble. The lack of capitalization doesn't really bother me though, mainly because back in college I fell in love with Lucille Clifton who did the same thing (And also wrote FAAAAAAARRR better poetry)

And what's worse? THIS BITCH BECAME A FUCKING BEST SELLING POET.

https://www.prnewswire.com/news-rel...-kaur-reach-one-million-copies-300399800.html

Not trying to get political or anything, but Rupi Kaur is all the proof we need of literary decline. Here's her wikipedia page if anyone wants to give it a glance over. She's potential lolcow material, IMO.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rupi_Kaur

This is proof that literature quality is sure as fuck in decline.

 

[Elwood P. Dowd]

There are certainly less talented poets, but none so maddenishly gorpy and glurgy as Rod McKuen.

Beat me to it. He is everything bad about the 1970s, memorialized on paper forever.

A Cat Named Sloppy
by Rod McKuen

Edit: I stole the garbage I quoted wholesale from this site. (Archive.) Whoever is running the site is such a McKuen fan they couldn't even the the title of the poem right. The cat's name was Sloopy, not Sloppy. (Presumably in reference to this old song?) Dunno if anyone else finds that funny, but I do.

 

[Fareal]

People are a bit hard on McGonagall. Nowadays he’d make a fortune writing the messages for greetings cards.

 

[fortunecookie]

That Venus tranny

 

[NARPASSWORD]

Chris

 

[UselessRubberKeyboard]

Probably an unpopular view, but Allen Ginsberg gets on my tits. He's not a bad poet (obviously), I just find the whole 'look Ma I can swear and talk about buttsex' thing cringingly pretentious. I get that Howl was outspoken for its time, but to me it sounds like a teenaged boy who just discovered punk music and wants to shock the parents at the school open evening. Anything to get a reaction ("I joined NAMBLA in defense of free speech" etc). If ever there was a lolcow poet, Ginsberg's your man.

 

[Monolith]

I just found Julia A Moore. She likes to rhyme words with themselves.