why are you still single - and general discussion of the dating game

[Lord of the Large Pants]

Fuck, don't put ideas in my head like that...

"'ay gurl, you wanna see the size of my... Kiwi Farms thread?"

 

[SIMIΔN]

The first few dates went really well, so I'm willing to believe her that life happened and needed to deal with family stuff also mothers day getting in the way didnt help either. If she cancels next week I'm going to take the hint and move on.

That's a healthy attitude. Besides, its good she's got a healthy relationship with her family as too many foreigner-dating girls do so to get back at their parents.

The men who get depressed over not having a relationship are usually the ones not having that Maslow hierarchy need of parental love met.

Me too. I had an abusive childhood, and have a unhealthy tendency to seek 'validation' from women. I don't think I'm the only one with this issue.

 

[Wii U]

Mixture of many things. Busy with school. Gay guys mostly just into sex. Focusing on losing weight. It's just been very frustrating and lonely. I've kind of given up.

 

[JamusActimus]

Mixture of many things. Busy with school. Gay guys mostly just into sex. Focusing on losing weight. It's just been very frustrating and lonely. I've kind of given up.

I know the guy for you
@Vingle

 

[Hepativore]

It is a combination of things, but since I broke up with my girlfriend many years ago (She wanted children, I did not, and I thought we had already settled the matter before the relationship started) I have gotten very used to being single, and after witnessing so many people being stuck in bad relationships or being unhappy with their partners, I have come to the realization that the "grass is always greener" when it comes to romance. The same people who bitch about being bitter and lonely about being single are probably the same people that would bitch about their partner and relationship constantly if they were in one, so a lot of these people would be miserable either way.

I also think that marriage is a waste of time, as it guarantees nothing in terms of relationship stability or happiness, and going through a divorce seems like hell, so I admit that this is something that I disagree with a lot of people on in terms of popular sentiments. I am not coming down on long-term relationships, it is just that I think that we should let them continue for as long as they need to or let them run their course. I think it also makes it too easy for people to take each other for granted when they know that their partners are legally-bound to them so they cannot just simply leave if things are going sour. In many cases, marriage just makes it more difficult for people to get out of a relationship that they should have ended years ago.

At this point, I am just doing my own thing without having to worry about the stress of trying to make somebody else happy. When I listen to the other tenants in the apartment complex have screaming arguments with each other that you can hear through the walls, I consider myself lucky that I am single rather than having to go through that.

 

[DumbDude43]

everything i like, women hate
everything women like, i hate

null makes this point and its solid. The most dispicable fat greasy uggo lolcows on this site have mostly all had, not just sex, but children and marriage.

The quality of it being dubious, but they've had it.

If Ethan ralph, the irate gamer, King Cobes, Chris Chan, and I THINK even cyraxx, can get some YOU HAVE NO EXCUSE.

this is retarded because it (probably deliberately) ignores the elephant in the room that is fame/infamy and status.
it's a bit like pointing out that danny devito has a wife despite being a bald fat ugly manlet and thinking that this proves that being bald/fat/ugly/manlet isn't an issue.

 

[WULULULULU]

Time. Too much I have to consider between getting a job and earning enough money to put in the piggy bank to save enough. Marriage is in my plans so for sure I'll get one but with how bad things are economic-wise, I'd have to wait until I have enough to consider it.

 

[Montalbane]

Got toyed with too much.

Mind you I have had my fair share of experiences but it seems like lately women have been nothing but cruel to me for no reason at all.
I realize that maybe I am too kind for my own good but is being courteous such a weakness that people feel legitimized to treat you like shit ?

Had one chick stand me up at the last possible minute after a hour and a half drive.
A woman I had known for close to 8 years had me plan a whole holiday to paris only to cancel it one week before we were to depart and stop talking to me without any reasons why.

It really feels a lot meaner out there.
I dont lose hope but still it hurts.

 

[Kel1 shi1]

I'd have to wait until I have enough to consider it.

It will never be enough, only enough for her to get the ring. After that? Good luck.

 

[Party Hat Wurmple]

It is a combination of things, but since I broke up with my girlfriend many years ago (She wanted children, I did not, and I thought we had already settled the matter before the relationship started) I have gotten very used to being single, and after witnessing so many people being stuck in bad relationships or being unhappy with their partners, I have come to the realization that the "grass is always greener" when it comes to romance. The same people who bitch about being bitter and lonely about being single are probably the same people that would bitch about their partner and relationship constantly if they were in one, so a lot of these people would be miserable either way.

You shouldn't believe young women who say they don't want children. The young women who say that might mean it now, but often they change their mind down the road. The other thing I don't think people talk about is the fact that dating YOU might make them want children. They can swear they don't want children and truly 100% mean it but dating you removes the option from them and can actually make them change their mind on it and dump you because they solely want the choice.

Second, have kids you fucking faggot. Unless you have some severe genetic deformity or schizophrenia, you don't have an excuse. It's the only purpose in life that matters so stop being a NEET bitch. A child's world is what you make it. If you hate the world because the WEF does everything in their power to prevent you from having kids, you don't win against them by not having children. Having kids is the only thing you'll do in life that ever truly matters.

As far as marriage goes, don't do it. You're right on that.

Time. Too much I have to consider between getting a job and earning enough money to put in the piggy bank to save enough. Marriage is in my plans so for sure I'll get one but with how bad things are economic-wise, I'd have to wait until I have enough to consider it.

Marriage is fantastic. The marriage industry complex is not. Let it fucking die. The wedding DJs who try to charge thousands? Let them go homeless. The wedding planners who skim off the top? Let them go broke. Let these people who profited off the wedding industry go back to negotiating with people again. Let these wedding rates fucking plummet. Stop paying these faggots who charge exorbitant rates for weddings. But most of all? Let these hoes who expect you to take out a loan for a wedding go fucking unmarried.

Mind you I have had my fair share of experiences but it seems like lately women have been nothing but cruel to me for no reason at all.

It's definitely getting worse. Young women don't see men they aren't attracted to as humans.

I realize that maybe I am too kind for my own good but is being courteous such a weakness that people feel legitimized to treat you like shit ?

Yes. There's dozens of videos of women saying how guys being nice and courteous to them give them the ick. It's just getting worse and worse. There's no real solution here.

Had one chick stand me up at the last possible minute after a hour and a half drive.
A woman I had known for close to 8 years had me plan a whole holiday to paris only to cancel it one week before we were to depart and stop talking to me without any reasons why.

Seriously, fuck her. I'd get some hard revenge on her, but that's just me. I've been burned and stood up too many times to tolerate this bullshit. I'd send her a bill for the cancellation fees and tell her to get fucked.

 

[(((Obar Lazcano Kamz)))]

I refuse to change myself emotionally for women, so im stubborn yet friendly and nice to them. I dont pursue women like they want to be pursued (aka fanatically) so i just dont interact with them beyond a certain point.

I find that if people really liked me they'd accept that im more laid back and less of a lap dog retard than they are used to. I strive to be productive and progressive rather than pretend like i like you.

Personally i just dont care anymore and if i find someone that meshes well with me then epic.

Sex doesnt motivate me but having an enjoyable time with another person does...

 

[Kit Marz]

Because the women I date are scared of commitment. Take my last girlfriend as an example. We felt an instant connection, had the same values, we both felt natural talking and being with each other. Her family loved me and immediately welcomed me in. We would play games online with her siblings and they would be upset if I wasn’t able to join. Then, out of nowhere she decides to end things. I asked her why and she said that she loves being with me, that I’m a positive example in her life that makes her want to be better, and is grateful I’m in her life, but she doesn’t think she loves.

I’ve had similar conversations with other ex’s who say similar things and then tell me they can’t bring themselves to love me and it wouldn’t be fair for me to be so supportive when they can’t offer that same support back.

I’ve just about given up. On paper, I’m a catch. I’m easy to talk to, supportive, funny, have my own interests, have a good job, tall, good looking, and physically fit. It just doesn’t translate to the real world for some reason.

 

[DumbDude43]

Then, out of nowhere she decides to end things. I asked her why and she said that she loves being with me, that I’m a positive example in her life that makes her want to be better, and is grateful I’m in her life, but she doesn’t think she loves.

this means she found someone else and doesn't want to say it outright to protect her reputation.
like, if her whole family loves you, and she outright says "yeah i dumped him for some other guy" then that could make her look bad in their eyes, so instead you get this.

 

[Kit Marz]

this means she found someone else and doesn't want to say it outright to protect her reputation.
like, if her whole family loves you, and she outright says "yeah i dumped him for some other guy" then that could make her look bad in their eyes, so instead you get this.

It's either that or she got scared or both. She doesn't have many friends and hasn't really dated anyone seriously before. I'm more disappointed than anything else. She also got mad I rejected her offer of friendship. She expected me to still hang out with her and her family after she broke things off. I didn't see how that would benefit anyone.

 

[DumbDude43]

She expected me to still hang out with her and her family after she broke things off. I didn't see how that would benefit anyone.

she tried to friendzone you lol
basically it means she considers you good enough to provide her with companionship, entertainment and favors, but not good enough for love and intimacy.

 

[Ibanez RG 350EX]

She also got mad I rejected her offer of friendship. She expected me to still hang out with her and her family after she broke things off.

Damn, I should really try that next time.

"Yeah, I'm not interested in dealing with your bullshit anymore, but I expect us to keep fucking on a regular basis and I'm going to be angry if you decline".

You miss 100% of the shots you don't take, right?

 

[doodoocaca]

Despite pissing off a lot of people on the internet I'm neither an incel nor have I actually been single as an adult for more than a few months at a time. I've always just been in a relationship and never struggled to find another. I also tend to have longer relationships than many seem to report.

I'm currently watching my partner, who is in her 30s, deteriorate more and more rapidly due to not taking care of herself. When I suggest she do so, excuses piled up; I now have a complete home gym in addition to living in a place full of nice paved walking trails and bike lanes. The emotional, verbal cope on her part is any mention of someone physically deteriorating is "fatshaming" regardless of how much it has to do with how fat they are, or their age, or their health condition.

Needless to say, I do not want to stay with someone who is going to turn into a blob and get sicker and sicker with time. That's something you should do on your own without dragging other people into it, if you're that much of a retard. Also, yes, watching someone get lumpy middle aged fat sucks, and choosing to make your partner see you look like shit is fucking selfish.

On the other hand, the dating pool is a fucking cesspool. What the fuck? I lurked a bit, and holy fuck, everyone saying it sucks wasn't kidding at all.

I'm pushing 40, so it would probably be far, far, far easier to date younger than look for a woman my age who isn't a goddamned mess.

If I have to put my foot down and split, I really have no clue what to do or where my chances are best. I'm seriously considering a rural area and finding a church at this point.

 

[DumbDude43]

Needless to say, I do not want to stay with someone who is going to turn into a blob and get sicker and sicker with time. That's something you should do on your own without dragging other people into it, if you're that much of a retard. Also, yes, watching someone get lumpy middle aged fat sucks, and choosing to make your partner see you look like shit is fucking selfish.

it's not even just about looks
the trajectory goes something like fat at 30, diabetic at 40, and likely to end up disabled or dead long before your time.
like, i've had a relative literally go blind from diabetic retinopathy in his late 50s, it's fucking terrifying. that's the future you choose when you choose fat acceptance, and it's a terrible burden on your family (he is now dead, left his wife a lonely widow)

 

[doodoocaca]

it's not even just about looks
the trajectory goes something like fat at 30, diabetic at 40, and likely to end up disabled or dead long before your time.
like, i've had a relative literally go blind from diabetic retinopathy in his late 50s, it's fucking terrifying. that's the future you choose when you choose fat acceptance, and it's a terrible burden on your family (he is now dead, left his wife a lonely widow)

Even if it was just choosing to look like shit, it's honestly shitty too, and I really hate people coping all over everything because "I don't want to face being seen as not pretty even if I put no effort into it!" when they themselves absolutely picked partners, including yourself, based on looks themselves.

It's also disability. It's also no energy. It's also wearing your clothes out from thigh and arm to torso rubbing. It's stinking. It's also continuing to eat too much shitty food. It's also diabetes and all the problems from that like going blind or losing feeling in your feet or having them fucking rot.

And, yes, it's traumatizing your family by dying after putting them through a decline you chose for yourself.

Fuck this shit gets on my nerves.

 

[Kel1 shi1]

basically it means she considers you good enough to provide her with companionship, entertainment and favors, but

He gave her enough validation that she was confident she could trade up. I've been there, twice.