why are you still single - and general discussion of the dating game

[BULLY HUNTER_78]

The answer to those two questions is "yes". I'm not looking for a GF or a bangmaid. I'm actually not looking for a woman at all right now: I came in with a very non-controversial statement about women, and their appeal on a more than physical level. You seem to be having some trouble understanding what you're reading.

What you're saying also just isn't true. Even if someone were living with family (understandable in many cases today) and for some reason didn't clean his own clothes (bizarre), that wouldn't mean he's necessarily looking for a mom replacement.

They might not have a lot of luck, but then again I think I've seen guys like that in my hometown do alright for themselves.

I'm curious, though: what do you think men should want from women? What do you think a man's standards should be for one?

Sorry bro, I only read @Lidl Drip posts and she just happened to reply to you. I’m happy for your very non-controversial take. Or sorry that happened.

 

[California Newt]

Sorry bro, I only read @Lidl Drip posts

I'll let you get back to your important reply guy work

 

[BULLY HUNTER_78]

I'll let you get back to your important reply guy work

Thank ya kindly. Who knows champ, if ever you make an interesting post, I might just follow you too.

 

[cybertoaster]

If I never expanded beyond /mlp/ and e621

The hell were you doing there to begin with?

 

[California Newt]

The hell were you doing there to begin with?

Meeting like-minded individuals.

The point is your hobbies aren't like some caste you're born into. That's a mental trap for people who make too much of an identity out of what they enjoy and think they're not the "type of person" to do other stuff. It's almost a form of learned helplessness.

 

[Friend of Dorothy Parker]

I came in with a very non-controversial statement about women, and their appeal on a more than physical level.

Do you mean the "I look at women like bugs..." comment?

I mean, I get the humor & the sexy bug thing, I guess. But a) if you really look at women like some kind of alien/other species, even a little, that might be something to aim to overcome, and b) picking a praying mantis. And I mean, aside from the reputed mating style, that one you posted is (I guess) beautiful in a bug way, but terrifying nonetheless. I assume that was the joke, but in case not, resolve that shit.

I was on the fence about whether I was being too literal, but then I read

I just don't care about them. They have shapes and voices that compel my attraction on a physical level, but that's it. You want to know why I'm thinking I should get a wife someday? It's "Man, I really need to stop jerking off. It'd be easier if I have a wife, plus then I could have a family which might be cool". I can't honestly ever say that I've been drawn to the force of personality of a woman. They can be nice and even pleasant to be around, but they're kind of boring.

Maybe that's ok, though. Connecting on your passions is what men are for. Or maybe I just haven't met her yet

Lord. Literally every sentence is fucked up, man. On varying and multiple levels. Good luck.

 

[California Newt]

Do you mean the "I look at women like bugs..." comment?

No. I mean:

I'd like to give an update that after reading a few pre 20th century books on women, when people actually were willing to talk about the distinctions, I get the appeal now.

They're able to understand you in a holistic way rather than the discrete (not "discreet", you wise-acres; I don't mean "on the down low") way that men do.

That seems to be part of what's meant by referring to women as "the image of the image" and "the glory of the glory".

That's what I was referring to.

I mean, I get the humor & the sexy bug thing, I guess. But a) if you really look at women like some kind of alien/other species, even a little, that might be something to aim to overcome, and b) picking a praying mantis. And I mean, aside from the reputed mating style, that one you posted is (I guess) beautiful in a bug way, but terrifying nonetheless. I assume that was the joke, but in case not, resolve that shit.

It was a joke, but bear in mind that female mantises only eat the males when they're hungry. It's not a normal part of the cycle. If the female looks well-fed, the males are more enthusiastic.

There have even reportedly been studies done where, after the females had their hunger chemically sated, the males even did a mating dance.

A damselfly would've been a better example. There's some light clasping of the female's neck involved, and they make a heart shape in flight which is kind of fun.


This one I know is a male: he's a "vivid dancer", to be specific. They're the state bug of Nevada, but exist in California too. Look at how strapping he is. The females are beige, acting all subdued like we won't find out. I don't want to have sex with bugs, I'm just having fun

Everyone's a bug under a microscope. You don't want to be dissected? I mean metaphorically, but even literally I think if we had infinite pain tolerance it'd be a great time.

Maybe in a more interesting body though.

Lord. Literally every sentence is fucked up, man. On varying and multiple levels. Good luck.

The issues you're referring to were mainly resolved after re-reading Emerson's essay on women, as well as a book of early patristic quotations on the subject.

My full thoughts on women so far can be found in the "serious lgbt discussion thread".

I appreciate it, though. There's a weight.

 

[Crunchy Bone Sandwich]

ive been used to making my own fun with my hobbies and interests my whole life that ive never had a boyfriend, and even when a guy irl was interested in me, i couldnt tell at all because i had no experience.. it doesnt help that ive been blackpilled online on how many men are pedophilic or porn addicts, its just a grim situation and im over it

 

[UtadaWasabi2]

I use kiwifarm to remind me that I am not alone in this world and there are many people who are as autistic as me.

 

[California Newt]

ive been used to making my own fun with my hobbies and interests my whole life that ive never had a boyfriend, and even when a guy irl was interested in me, i couldnt tell at all because i had no experience.. it doesnt help that ive been blackpilled online on how many men are pedophilic or porn addicts, its just a grim situation and im over it

Why are you worried about porn addicts? Are you concerned that they'll turn gay from looking at other men's penises all the time? Because if so you're right, that's a real problem.

But if they're with you they're probably not pedophilic, right? Or gay?

 

[raspberry mocha]

Why don't you all end your love quests by dating each other?

 

[Crunchy Bone Sandwich]

Why are you worried about porn addicts? Are you concerned that they'll turn gay from looking at other men's penises all the time? Because if so you're right, that's a real problem.

But if they're with you they're probably not pedophilic, right? Or gay?

its gay shit but its also a sign of sexual dysfunction, to have a partner youre commited to, but still feeling the compulsion to crank it to other women, also apparently it fucks with their dopamine responses and makes irl sex less satisfying
to the second point, ive seen many horror stories of women finding out their husbands were looking at gay porn years into the marriage or even talking to kids online ()

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

Why don't you all end your love quests by dating each other?

I would only date a Kiwi-chick if she were hot and had the coin.

 

[California Newt]

its gay shit but its also a sign of sexual dysfunction, to have a partner youre commited to, but still feeling the compulsion to crank it to other women, also apparently it fucks with their dopamine responses and makes irl sex less satisfying
to the second point, ive seen many horror stories of women finding out their husbands were looking at gay porn years into the marriage or even talking to kids online ()

Being attracted to other women is not a dysfunction; jerking off is.

I think that if a man has real friends and a real community that he does difficult and purposeful things in, he's less likely to get into that gay stuff. It's fraternal incest.

 

[cocko]

I'm single because once you graduate high school you have 0 chances to spend enough time with women to develop feelings. Shit, even making friends who have an Inner World is impossible, in college my friends only hung out with me like once a month and they were so vapid that I preferred playing video games in my room. The situation is only getting worse as more people are willingly choosing to drive themselves crazy with dating app hookups.

 

[cocko]

Pfft, I ain't giving up the few things I enjoy for some bitch.

You should have a couple of hobbies where you can mingle and relate with normietards. You shouldn't ditch your nerdy interests but you need some mainstream ones to meet new people and break the ice with conversations where they can relate and feel like their input matters.

Go to the movie theater once a month, join a sport like tennis or bouldering gyms, learn how to bake, volunteer locally. Be on the lookout for anything in your area that interests you and keep an open mind. Eventbrite is great for this.

Worst case scenario find a local board games/D&D group if you're that autistic.

 

[TheNoseKnows]

I'm single because once you graduate high school you have 0 chances to spend enough time with women to develop feelings. Shit, even making friends who have an Inner World is impossible, in college my friends only hung out with me like once a month and they were so vapid that I preferred playing video games in my room. The situation is only getting worse as more people are willingly choosing to drive themselves crazy with dating app hookups.

And this is why I will never shun eastern cultures for pushing young marriages (when you have a decent pool to mingle with), clearly the screw around until you become successful western idea isn't all its touted to be.

 

[Tanuki Mixed Nuts]

Just checking in with this thread. Still single. Saw a shadowy figure out of the corner of my eye earlier.

 

[Giles Corey]

its gay shit but its also a sign of sexual dysfunction, to have a partner youre commited to, but still feeling the compulsion to crank it to other women, also apparently it fucks with their dopamine responses and makes irl sex less satisfying
to the second point, ive seen many horror stories of women finding out their husbands were looking at gay porn years into the marriage or even talking to kids online ()

Honestly, you don't realise how much algorithms are responsible for this. Constantly reading stories day in and day out basically designed to feast on your insecurities (he's always going to think about other women) is clearly playing a massive role in how you see the world. Tech companies get more data from you the more you spend online and they know that their best bet is to constantly feed you horror stories. It's social engineering designed to atomize people. Tech companies don't want people fucking so they are conditioning people into faggotry, trannydom or just miserable human beings. Your anxiety is a vicious cycle where you struggle to cope with the real world therefore you spend more time online. One reinforces the other keeping you trapped.

And this is why I will never shun eastern cultures for pushing young marriages (when you have a decent pool to mingle with), clearly the screw around until you become successful western idea isn't all its touted to be.

Yup. The parents that push the "put your studies over relationships" style of thinking have produced some of the most unhappiest people ever. Like seriously college should be the time to fuck around and find love as well as advance your career. The irony is that even if they end up getting great grade they will still end up faring worse in the employment market because of their lack of people's skills.

I'm single because once you graduate high school you have 0 chances to spend enough time with women to develop feelings. Shit, even making friends who have an Inner World is impossible, in college my friends only hung out with me like once a month and they were so vapid that I preferred playing video games in my room. The situation is only getting worse as more people are willingly choosing to drive themselves crazy with dating app hookups.

Dude. Is there not like a club or a society you can join in college?

 

[Geddy Lee's Fee and See]

Yup. The parents that push the "put your studies over relationships" style of thinking have produced some of the most unhappiest people ever. Like seriously college should be the time to fuck around and find love as well as advance your career. The irony is that even if they end up getting great grade they will still end up faring worse in the employment market because of their lack of people's skills.

Most people shouldn't even be in college because they aren't learning anything worthwhile nor are going to do much with it. Outside of STEM, medical, trades and (Allah forgive me for saying this) law school, most people basically only have a high school education at the end of college. In a saner world, they'd already be in the workforce post-high school. Getting married soon after high school is the best bet for most people. At least the people in college studying important shit are doing something other than fucking every rando they meet. What excuse does the average person have for not getting married by the time they are 20-22? None really. College should be about educational advancement first and foremost. If you want to find a spouse, find her after your high school graduation.