Write a scary story in two sentences

[Stock Photo James]

You wake up and casually check the Internet. Every single site is now owned by Zuckerberg.

 

[TheClorax]

You hop in front of a moving train.
You don’t die.

 

[Armchair Psychologist]

You walk out to your mailbox. Rent is due.

 

[Monolith]

You wake up and turn on your computer to shitpost. "This site has been blocked by your internet service provider."

 

[:thinking:]

The coat hanger was not covered in blood. This had to change.

 

[Adamska]

You get annoyed as you find that your dinner is still undercooked. The meal begins wailing in agony.

 

[MG 620]

Bob, I'm pregnant! JULAAAAAAY!!!!

 

[Procyon]

I don't remember anything.
My phone is ringing.

 

[Coconut Gun]

You make a joke down at the pub over some fish and chips. You hear the door being beaten down as you realize you forgot your joke licence at home.

 

[TheClorax]

You wake up in bed naked after a long night drinking.
Barb is sleeping next to you.

 

[GethN7]

You google search your name. You have a Kiwi Farms thread.

 

[Somar]

A little boy got casted in the live action South Park movie. He was then given an orange coat to wear for the film.

 

[Teri-Teri]

You are a German soldier on the Eastern Front in the middle of winter. Then the Russians came.

 

[MG 620]

You are a lolcow thriving on Tumblr. Then Kiwi Farms came.

 

[MarvinTheParanoidAndroid]

Wake up.

Realize this is your life.

 

[:thinking:]

We're no strangers to love. You know the rules and so do I.

 

[Adamska]

After fighting down your nerves, you finally pull the trigger of the gun in your mouth. You gargle and choke on your own blood, still awake, still alive.

 

[c-no]

It's a hot day and you're sitting on your chair. Then came that swamp ass.

 

[MarvinTheParanoidAndroid]

You put your head through the noose and jump.

The building caves in from above you.

 

[Junkail]

You have a date tonight. Simon Öhlund is babysitting your children.