You are cooking a burrito i the microwave for one and a half minutes

I haven't owned a microwave for over a decade. If I want a burrito, I buy one already hot from a Mexican
 
I haven't owned a microwave for over a decade. If I want a burrito, I buy one already hot from a Mexican
I prefer to give my hot burrito to the Mexicans. Once those chicks hit like 25 though it is all downhill. They go from latin beauty to horse leather overnight. White women are the next most beautiful, but they hit the wall at about thirty and begin a gradual decline. Asian women are the best. They gradually age both up and down. Black women for the most part just look like men. Latin women are the most fucking beautiful women for like a year until they turn into Jeb Bush's wife.
jeb wife.jpg
 
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I'd eat it frozen. It's all going to end up in the same place so what's the point of cooking food anyway?
 
Why track down a Mexican every time you feel like a burrito?
because frozen burritos are FUCKING SHIT, nothing but beans mushed into paste and textured soy protein, too hot on the outside and too cold on the inside, man fuck that shit just go find a pedro or a juanita they'll fuckin' hook you up with the real shit yo

fuckin' get a pork tamale too
 
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I turn the knob to halfway between 1 and 2
 

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My microwave's a counter decoration I haven't used in almost 10 years. Microwaved food is garbage. It's pretty much the worst way you could choose to heat literally any food, except that popcorn that comes in the bags.
 
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