How are you doing? - Kiwi Farms Wellness Check

My agoraphobia is getting worse again; however, since I know it’s because of the pandemic I believe I’ll bounce back and I don’t have to have someone come with me to the grocery store. I’ve been dealing with it all my life and it just sucks that I have to desensitize myself again.
 
Not doing too well. Starting to realize the positives and negatives of the new project I was assigned to in May is heavily weighted towards the latter. I should probably just quit at this point. I'm also tired of my apparent tendency to befriend people that are completely unreliable. I just feel so isolated and unvalued. For months now, I haven't been able to muster the energy to draw or read the books I currently have open.
Things are going better on the job front, I'm in line for a promotion in about two weeks.
 
A person whom i considered my best friend and would talk to everyday for 7 years, who was legit funny, down to earth and had a rather dark sense of humour, the moment he got an ounce of vagina ( a 3 out 10 geeky quirky uwu unfunny vagina) he made a 180 and turned full simp. Became PC, would spam :3 MY LOVE TEE HEE on her streams in which he would be the only person talking. We are all retards fags here, but im amazed i havent seen this comming
Good ridance i guess
 
A person whom i considered my best friend and would talk to everyday for 7 years, who was legit funny, down to earth and had a rather dark sense of humour, the moment he got an ounce of vagina ( a 3 out 10 geeky quirky uwu unfunny vagina) he made a 180 and turned full simp. Became PC, would spam :3 MY LOVE TEE HEE on her streams in which he would be the only person talking. We are all retards fags here, but im amazed i havent seen this comming
Good ridance i guess
A guy in an anime I watched recently went that way too. He fell for a prostitute, he lured his friends for money and stole from his family. He was utterly fooled by the prostitute, and she committed an hero with another guy.
He became friends with his old friends again, after nearly freezing to death after waiting for their meeting spot.
 
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Late 2000s/early 2010s blend in an annoying way. Only good thing was that it was before SJWs became mainstream and the identity politics shit we see nowadays really didn't exist. Gawd, am I saying I miss "Party Rock Anthem" days?

bro i miss them days and idc how lame it sounds... seems like it was around the last time people would go out and party alot........... they still do but not to the same extent
 
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Last October my uncle, my grandfather's first born son died and left his wife a widow and his children fatherless, a year before that my aunt died of old age and emphasyhemia. She lived a long life and was ready to go but my uncle? his oldest child was just starting college when he passed. My grandfather had lived through the two losses no man should ever have to face, the death of his wife and first born son.


Death....grim old buddy, I know you're just "doing your job." and the universe works in mysterious ways our mortal inferior minds could never comprehend, but if it's not too much to ask can you please stop taking family members away from me and let me enjoy the month of October without having to attend a funeral?
 
That work project dealing with cataloging dems and jew pedo crap continues. Today really messed me up. I'm gonna spoiler this in case you can't handle it today, because I certainly couldn't.
Today I learned what the word nepiophile means from a MAP on a twitter post. It means someone that wants to sex up babies and toddlers. That messed me up.
Also I had to deal with an article about some 8 year old who was gang raped by 16 male relatives until she died.
I don't know about you, but after that, my mind went blank. I got up, walked into another room away from the screen and just sat down. Nothing but a sincere sense of dark sickness and oppression, and I have a long way to go. Also more stuff comes in from time to time so yay me! ... I feel like hell and I want to explode and I don't know what to do except go do other things and take my mind off of these people who are out there in control of stuff.
Also I found out the town I grew up in? The cops might have a set of ties to this pedo crap. Can't prove it, but what I have dealt with concerning them in the past... wouldn't put it past them and the entire county's police force honestly. I'm glad I'm away from them.

In better news I got a new comp (if I didn't go on about it before) and it can play Sekiro well so that's a thing.

EDIT: - Just walked out for a break because I needed it. Hearing / reading about
2 year old raped by like 34 men, not a 34 year old, THIRTY FOUR DIFFERENT MEN over the course of 36 days
made me get up, leave the place and go to the local grocery store. I bought some Amish chicken burgers came back and cooked them up and put the hottest spices I could on the damn things. The red pepper one hit the spot. I feel so sick inside I can't stand it.
Also thank you Amish people for your chicken I guess.
 
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we got a new cook at work today. I should be glad cause that means I'll have more help around the kitchen and maybe even more days off once the new guy learns the ropes, but I can't shake this sinking feeling that they're planning on replacing me. I've been told time and time again there's nothing to worry about and they we just need more cooks around the kitchen, but I just can't shake the feeling. Guess it's just my past experiences haunting me. The anxiety is crushing me and it's gonna get worse before the year's out.


Also this might go under the pisses you off thread but there was a mysterious charge to my paycard and with he surcharge resulting from it, I'm 80 bucks in the red, idk what the charge was for either but it couldn't have been stolen or anything so my guess is someone fucked up, that means next payday i get get 80 les than what i earned, bullshit.
 
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