Bad Weddings and Wedding Trends - sperg about weddings here

[Jaded Optimist]

In regards to the garter thing; I went to a wedding which was obviously doomed (cheating contantly on both sides) and i caught the bouquet, my then boyfriend (later ex fiance) caught the garter belt. He hung it on his rear view mirror for a year plus...It was so weird.
The wedding was a disaster, the husband grabbed my butt during the reception. They divorced less then a year later (iirc) I ended up living with her, and she had a boyfriend who she cheated on with her ex constantly. Like one would leave and the other would be there within half an hour.

 

[Xarpho]

That sounds like it could have easily gone wrong and potentially set someone on fire.

Oh yeah. In the first wedding that had them, some kid had thrown a not-quite-dead one into the bucket with the rest of them, creating a small fire in the bucket, and melting the remaining sparklers into an impenetrable burnt crust.



My sister's wedding was the second one that had them but the weather had been unusually cool and moist that day, so nothing bad happened, though the sparkler issue was one of the items of contention.

 

[Zero Day Defense]

Then I was faced in the street with someone who was very angry, very upset and screaming at me “what am I going to do with this ring, you cunt”.

I'll keep everything you said in mind, though now I'm reconsidering buying an engagement ring for the proposition.

 

[Mealy Mouth Spittle]

I'll keep everything you said in mind, though now I'm reconsidering buying an engagement ring for the proposition.

My husband and I went to look at rings before he proposed. So, it wasn't a total surprise when he did it. I just didn't know exactly when he was going to propose to me. He wanted to make sure he got a ring that I liked (and knew the correct size). You could also ask friends or family to help you with that if you want it to be a surprise. Just make sure to ask someone who can keep it a secret.

You could always buy a ring at someplace like Costco. That's where my husband bought my ring. It was a lot cheaper (it was appraised at twice what he paid for it) and they take returns if for some reason it doesn't work out. (They just make sure you haven't swapped out the stones.) I know it's not very romantic to buy a ring from Costco, but the amount he saved paid for our honeymoon -- so I was fine with it. It's a nice ring.

 

[kidsquid]

The future Mr Squid and I just wanna go and elope as neither of us enjoy being the centre of attention but his mother said she wants to see her son get married even though my parents were the ones who suggest we elope. We're going cheap as it's all we can afford really. Problem is I have no idea where to start planning and it's making me want to give up before I've even begun

I got dragged to my high school boyfriend's cousin's wedding where the only people I knew were him and his parents, and then the people we were supposed to share our table with never turned up. I really didn't want to go but felt obliged and I was miserable in spanx that were a size too small the whole time. Only other weddings I've been to were an uncle marrying and another uncle having a vow renewal cause he eloped.

A big problem with weddings these days is everyone has to outdo everyone else. I don't know why it suddenly became a competition - the only thing that should matter at the end of the day is the dumb piece of paper that legally binds you and gets you some tax breaks. Like why does it matter that you had the most expensive dress or location or honeymoon? Are they gonna make the memories sweeter somehow or are you just gonna look back and think shit we shouldn't have spent so much money.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

Oh yes! Proposals can totally be talked about here.

Oh nice. So I'm suddenly reminded of the common cheesy Mormon proposal in which the guy would get his girlfriend a watch while saying "This is for time", and then bring out the ring to conclude, "And this is for eternity", and it typically would be on temple grounds, too. My dad didn't do that kind of proposal to Mom, but he did ask her to marry him near a radiator on the temple grounds that had decided to kick on (loudly) mid-sentence and she didn't hear him the first time around lol.

But I'm glad to know I'm not alone in thinking talks of marriage isn't weird between boyfriend and girlfriend. I was under the impression since my teenage years that dating was at some point to lead to marriage, so therefore you date with that kind of mindset in looking for a lifelong mate. Boyfriend isn't ready for marriage for the time being, but the what-ifs talks of marriage has been brought up here and there, if just for a personal confirmation that it's a future goal in mind. In terms of proposal, I dunno how he'll approach it (I kinda don't expect a ring at first tbqh, though wasn't it once tradition for the bride's/groom's mom to hand over her engagement ring in a pinch?), but in general, I really don't know how it and wedding plans are to go between long-distance couples.

Yea and typically the guy makes it as creepy and uncomfortable as possible (as with just about everything that has to do with the garter). There is no need to remove the garter with your teeth!

I just don't get this at all. I suppose it's being done more and more because the bride and groom would've already banged long before getting engaged, but have some fucking decency around other people. Don't let them know about your sex life like that, y'know? What's so wrong with having the groom and bride be in the pose of the old-timey gynecologist picture?

Well, in terms of blindly searching for the garter, anyway. Would be in bad taste for him to stick his fingers up there.

Or the bridal toss.

Wait what. Is it like the whole midget tossing thing, or closer to a bar mitzvah? Would it count as killing two birds with one stone to toss a midget bride?

Here's another trend I don't get -- Weird wedding photos:

Last one there's funny lol. I can see the appeal of being a goofball, I kinda wouldn't mind doing one of those myself.

The only exception was I had a cousin that got married with some "wacky" elements like vague video game themes and some non-traditional wedding music including video game soundtracks, movie soundtracks, and the Soviet national anthem

Pffft the other day my boyfriend and I talked about wedding playlists and he legit put "Giovinezza" (the Italian National Fascist Party national anthem) in his. He eventually decided against it, though (I didn't prompt him at all), but then he's got a '90s kick going with Eiffel 65, Smash Mouth, Beastie Boys, and Chumbawamba among others listed as well as a couple of tracks from actual hentai series (I have some anime tracks in mine, too, so the unconventional music playlists are inevitable). Here I am with this romantic-sounding playlist that I totally didn't put a lot of thought into out of boredom, and he's just being his goofy manchild self lol. It's fun.

Although that makes me think about music playlists for weddings. Last wedding reception I had attended was a cousin's some years back that was held in her mom's backyard, and the music was mainly country music (both her and her husband like country), and it gave me high school flashbacks to the dances and such. So wedding reception music can legit just be anything the bride and groom wants it to be, right, no matter how off-the-walls it can get? Same with the father-daughter dance?

 

[NoReturn]

Oh my gosh! I used to love Wedding Peach! Now that is a good anime. We should seriously have a girly anime thread for the beauty parlor where we can sperg about anime without having it shit up by dudes sperging about their big titty monster girl isekai series and shit.

@ me if you guys make one, I wanna see.

Not sure whether to post these here or the shitty etsy product thread, but even though Etsy has a great reputation of having a good selection of wedding decor and whatnot, if you search "geek wedding" you get a lot of stuff that screams "How do you do fellow nerds?"

These are all from the same shop:

 

[Fialovy]

I'll keep everything you said in mind, though now I'm reconsidering buying an engagement ring for the proposition.

What a lot of people do I have noticed is buy cheap stand in rings for the proposal then have them pick out the real ring later as long as she realizes that isn't the real ring, that is fine.

That reminds me, here is some selfish bitch I remember from way back when who had a meltdown because she received a priceless heirloom ring that has been in the groom's family for generations and meant a lot that she hated.

Spoiler

But I'm glad to know I'm not alone in thinking talks of marriage isn't weird between boyfriend and girlfriend. I was under the impression since my teenage years that dating was at some point to lead to marriage, so therefore you date with that kind of mindset in looking for a lifelong mate. Boyfriend isn't ready for marriage for the time being, but the what-ifs talks of marriage has been brought up here and there, if just for a personal confirmation that it's a future goal in mind. In terms of proposal, I dunno how he'll approach it (I kinda don't expect a ring at first tbqh, though wasn't it once tradition for the bride's/groom's mom to hand over her engagement ring in a pinch?), but in general, I really don't know how it and wedding plans are to go between long-distance couples.

My husband and I were long distance before we got married. I guess first thing to need to figure out before getting engaged is where you want to live and making plans to close the long distance gap, that is the most important thing. It will be kind of tricky though if both of you are expected to go to appointments, but usually you can do stuff like have him or you phone into the appointment or set up a webcam or something. You wouldn't be the first ones to do that.

Although that makes me think about music playlists for weddings. Last wedding reception I had attended was a cousin's some years back that was held in her mom's backyard, and the music was mainly country music (both her and her husband like country), and it gave me high school flashbacks to the dances and such. So wedding reception music can legit just be anything the bride and groom wants it to be, right, no matter how off-the-walls it can get? Same with the father-daughter dance?

Yeah, you can choose whatever music that is meaningful to you for the father-daughter and first dance. Just make sure you can dance to it somehow.

I will say though, it seems like every wedding I have been to someone always suggests to the DJ to play "Brick House" by the Commodores and "Pour Some Sugar on Me" which, isn't the latter usually played at strip clubs and well... Brick House is... Brick House, but I am always guaranteed to hear it at some wedding.

I have known brides and grooms who have blacklisted certain songs from playing because they hate them. I didn't do this myself because I totally trust the people at my wedding not to play anything too inappropriate, but that is a thing.

 

[Yeeted Teet]

That reminds me, here is some selfish bitch I remember from way back when who had a meltdown because she received a priceless heirloom ring that has been in the groom's family for generations and meant a lot that she hated.

Spoiler

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Maybe she was being a bitch, who knows without seeing the ring, but there definitely are dudes who'll propose with cheap or ugly rings without a second thought as to whether their partner will like it, and then play the "hurr duur women materialistic" card to guilt trip her into being happy with it. Everyone says it's the thought that counts, but if it was thoughtful he would have made an effort to get her something she'll be happy to wear every day for the rest of her life. If a guy proposed to me with an ugly ring that wasn't at all my style, I'd question if he knew me well enough for us to get married.

New playstations are what, $500? You can get a nice enough mossanite ring in yellow gold that'd match her description of what she wanted for that much. The way she wrote that it sounds like him not putting in effort is a pattern.

 

[Bakarina]

That reminds me, here is some selfish bitch I remember from way back when who had a meltdown because she received a priceless heirloom ring that has been in the groom's family for generations and meant a lot that she hated.

I don't understand why the proposal came as a shock when they'd been browsing for rings already. While maybe he should have shown her the heirloom ring to get her opinion on it prior to using it, she's honestly coming off as a shallow bitch (also, a ps4 can be enjoyed by more than just her and was probably put on layaway prior to this incident, it was also $400 upon launch and rings can easily be double or triple that).

Meh, I love family heirlooms. They tell a story about your family and it's something of an honor to be given such an item.

Maybe it was ugly as sin but she didn't have to say "yes" either if it was this big of an issue. We also only have one [very emotional] side to the story so who knows what actually went down.

 

[Fialovy]

Meh, I love family heirlooms. They tell a story about your family and it's something of an honor to be given such an item.

Same here, my ring was an heirloom ring. Another option could have been to use the stones from the heirloom to make something new which I have also seen done.

If a guy proposed to me with an ugly ring that wasn't at all my style, I'd question if he knew me well enough for us to get married.

New playstations are what, $500? You can get a nice enough mossanite ring in yellow gold that'd match her description of what she wanted for that much. The way she wrote that it sounds like him not putting in effort is a pattern.

That is true, they do sound like they are awful at communication either way. These people just flat out sound incompatible.

Edit: Also, here is another thing that annoys me, Military wives and wives of police officers/first responders whose whole identity is being a wife of someone of that occupation. It gets really annoying because do they have any other identity other than that?

 

[Red Mask]

Themed are usually tacky. That being said, I see nothing wrong with being “set part” or your own person. Tradition for the sake of tradition is just plain dumb. At least question why you follow a tradition. Just that, well, some people take it too far, BUT if they’re paying it themselves or supported by others, then whatever.

I just feel like you have individuality without being tacky. I guess it’s relative though.

 

[Bakarina]

The original ring my husband picked out was very much not to my taste but he picked it out from an extremely sweet perspective and it was clear as day that he spent a lot of time thinking about it. I would have gone to my grave with my opinion. However, the jeweler not only sized it wrong initially but then tried to pawn off a completely different (and much cheaper) ring than the one he actually bought so he asked for a refund.

People who work at jewelry stores are bloodthirsty and can/will rip you off if they think they can get away with it.

 

[Fialovy]

Themed are usually tacky. That being said, I see nothing wrong with being “set part” or your own person. Tradition for the sake of tradition is just plain dumb. At least question why you follow a tradition. Just that, well, some people take it too far, BUT if they’re paying it themselves or supported by others, then whatever.

I just feel like you have individuality without being tacky. I guess it’s relative though.

One thing I really hate is when people are like "It's my wedding, I can do whatever I want." which is true to some extent, but as soon as you invite people to your wedding, they start to matter too.

Like especially don't insert your fetishes like this couple did according to the bride's blog where they had a wedding AND a collaring ceremony, I will give them the benefit of the doubt and hope they didn't invite grandma or something.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

It will be kind of tricky though if both of you are expected to go to appointments

Uhhhh which appointments? Only appointments I can think of are the gynecological and andrological exams, and I don't want him to see me there right now.

But location talk I think is already set should that day ever come. My biggest concern about it is how many family members would be willing to fly round-trip out that far. Tickets were already pricey for one person when I had bought mine for my trip, and I come from a big family, and I didn't do well on the plane the last time I flew. Nothing screams "sexy" like airsickness.

Oh and fuck that bitch for whining about her proposal. I feel for the poor bastard who had to marry her (if they didn't break it off).

 

[Fialovy]

Uhhhh which appointments? Only appointments I can think of are the gynecological and andrological exams, and I don't want him to see me there right now.

haha, well, see, when planning a wedding, there are appointments with vendors you have to go to I remember having to go to was appointments with my wedding planner, with the venue to discuss my options with Covid, for the cake, appointments for catering to taste the food and finalize the menu and also meeting with the officiant (if I had a Catholic wedding, we would have had to have even more meetings plus Pre-Cana, oh joy...) . It is obviously different depending on vendor, like my DJ for example just was fine doing everything over email. Also, for most of the appointments, they didn't require my husband to be there, for the stuff related for food it was more encouraged, the only one that was required was the officiant.

 

[Kari Kamiya]

haha, well, see, when planning a wedding, there are appointments with vendors you have to go to

Oh, okay. Isn't that related to what @Troonos was saying in that the wedding industry is a scam designed to drain blood money out of the happy couple? Like there's nothing wrong with marrying in a courthouse when there's all of these checklists to go through. But I guess when people only go for the food, shouldn't be shocked to hear about these leeches.

Turns out my boyfriend's father is actually registered to legally officiate in his state and is more than willing to do his kids' weddings for free, so it's kinda funny how that works out lol. Food and location (and travel plans) is probably gonna be the big ones any way you slice it. (Hehe, cake slices.)

 

[Fialovy]

Oh, okay. Isn't that related to what @Troonos was saying in that the wedding industry is a scam designed to drain blood money out of the happy couple? Like there's nothing wrong with marrying in a courthouse when there's all of these checklists to go through. But I guess when people only go for the food, shouldn't be shocked to hear about these leeches.

Turns out my boyfriend's father is actually registered to legally officiate in his state and is more than willing to do his kids' weddings for free, so it's kinda funny how that works out lol. Food and location (and travel plans) is probably gonna be the big ones any way you slice it. (Hehe, cake slices.)

oh yes and you have to stick your ground a lot of times when it comes to sticking to your budget because there are people who are out there to try to rip you off, helps if you have a wedding planner to advocate for you, but it isn't required. Honestly, the only thing that matters is the guests food, the guests have some place to sit, and perhaps some sort of entertainment for them but even then they will usually find their own way to entertain themselves. Flowers and decorations? Nice, but nobody is going to talk about them 10 years down the road. Dress? Get a sample dress during a sample sale at a bridal salon if you must have something designer since those are usually heavily marked down, but anything over 1,000 dollars is not worth it.

That's pretty awesome! I guess you are all set!

 

[Nero You're DeadWeight]

Also, here is another thing that annoys me, Military wives and wives of police officers/first responders whose whole identity is being a wife of someone of that occupation. It gets really annoying because do they have any other identity other than that?

Not to give away anything really, but I live in an area where there are tons of military wives. Sadly, they really do think their whole identity is "OH I'M A MILITARY WIFE. RESPECT ME" I find their attitudes get worse the higher rank their partner is.
Which is really annoying because essentially, the service member has to be the tard wrangler. Just because your Partner is whatever rank doesn't mean you get to act like grand faggot general, the wife and their family REFLECTS their partner so if your actin the fool, your partner is going to get reprimanded. They don't fuck around where I live at least, but we usually have some "exceptionable" members who think they're above it all.

 

[EnemyStand]

So, I have a story about a personal cow's wedding he posted as a slideshow on Youtube (will not post the video here, because the sped used his real name in the title and I'm paranoid).
-Got married in one of the "castles" in the area. Not too big a deal...yet.
-So the groom is wearing an 18th century cavalry saber with a modern tux. It's kind of exceptional, but not that big of a deal, except the groomsmen are wearing katanas.
-The groomsmen handed the swords to the bride for some reason...
-Oh, and they're all in some weird red-and-black yi-fu-like shirts except for one groomsman in a black SPORT COAT AND T-SHIRT.
-The bridesmaids are a little better, they're in these thin shift-like dresses. One's pink, one's lavender, and one's turquoise. Turquoise chick is a hambeast
-Oh, wait, I forgot, there's four bridesmaids if you count the DOG. Wearing some little pink doggie dress. Yeah.
-The officiator (hard to tell if he's a priest or not) is in some mono-black yi-fu like shirt. Dude looks nonplussed in a few photos...
-Bride's getup is fine. Standard, really. It was kind of a shock, considering what I know about these people.
-In one shot the groom's kissing a dog on the lips (not the bridesmaid dog, a different one).

Kind of makes me want to go back in time to watch it in real time.