- Joined
- Mar 15, 2019
This is the saddest, most pathetic thing I’ve ever seen, and yet Chantal thinks Kiwis are all just jealous losers. Kiwis with actual careers and families and friends and hobbies and lives. It’s rather astonishing.
She's right though, I am incredibly jealous of her and her amazing life.
I don't want to be a wizard, a banisher of demons, keeper of secrets, hero of fairies, and master of the arcane.
I seethe with jealousy as I don't have an ass crusted in week old diarrhea. I wail in torment whenever I see my ears in a mirror. I cry out in despair as I don't have a crack head to slampig me on a dirty mattress on the floor. I lash out in pain on these here farms as I cannot take it out on an ex-fiance who is trooning out.
Truly the life of a kiwi is of desperation and sadness. If only the mighty queen of poutine could look down upon us from her mighty box mountain and show us how to beez.