Careercow Robert Chipman / Bob / Moviebob / "Movieblob" - Middle-Aged Consoomer, CWC with a Thesaurus, Ardent Male Feminist and Superior Futurist, the Twice-Fired, the Mario-Worshipper, publicly dismantled by Hot Dog Girl, now a diabetic

How will Bob react to seeing the Mario film?


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Does Robert know that a company called "mebomber" is making money off of his likeness?
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This Eternals shit really threw Robert off huh?

It is one of Robert m.o. that he doesn't go after any of his "mutuals" unless they are on acceptable side to do so, and when he does, he does so by quote tweets and such.

The funny thing about Robert is, that even though he boats this "Bahston Brawler" persona, Robert is surprisingly non confrontational when it comes down to people he knows he can't argue agaisnt.

Sure, Robert dunks on some of those autistic commie retards that plague his mentions, but this Scott guy seems like just a normal, reasonable guy. And Robert knew he was on the losing side of the argument, because he bent over sixfold to make sure "I'M NOT ATTACKING ANYONE!! I HAVE NO BEEF, THIS IS JUST IMO" was hammered in, and yet, he does come across as confrontational, because all the guy said was that a movie sucked, and Robert lost his shit because that can be used by the "chuds" in the "culture war".

This is nonsense, now we can't even say a crappy capeshit movie sucks because it will give "ammunition" so people can keep being autist on twitter? After stanning for months for this fucking movie, now Robert can't seem to deal with the fact that people aren't just into it, and also begs the question, does Robert really like these movies, or does he likes it because it is the right opinion to have?

Also, This stanning shit Robert is pulling with the chinese director is more hurtfull than anything the chuds could do. When you go on non stop about the FEMALE CHINESE ARTHOUSE DIRECTOR and the DIVERSE AND INCLUSIVE CAST and the film is a dud, the non spoken implication is that the diversity team ain't so great after all huh?

Of couse that would be stupid, but if that is the focus to be celebrated in a win, it will be the focus when you get a L as well, you don't get to change the game midway.

So Robert, you had you victory lap when Shang Chi made bank and was well received, now we get The Quartening making videos about the Eternals, and don't go bellyaching to people who aren't into this stupid game you are playing, YOU are the one who chose to see these fucking movies as arbiters of societal moral good, so deal with it, you don't get to drag people into this shit.
 
So Robert, you had you victory lap when Shang Chi made bank and was well received
Shang Chi is the top earning Marvel movie as of now. It sits at 7th place in top earning movies released this year.
Last time the top Marvel movie of the year was at 7th place or below, it was 2011 with the original Thor movie. MCU pre-avengers.

How is that a win?
 
Shang Chi is the top earning Marvel movie as of now. It sits at 7th place in top earning movies released this year.
Last time the top Marvel movie of the year was at 7th place or below, it was 2011 with the original Thor movie. MCU pre-avengers.

How is that a win?
It's only ever a win due to theatres being reopened this year so there is some credibility to that.

This won't be said for Eternals because critics don't like it and most people but hardcore MCU fanboys don't care about it. The best part about this in regards to Bob is that it's actual film critics, the social class that he claims to belong to that hate this movie so it's hard for anyone to buy his arguments of the racist internet trolls ruining it.
 
Does Robert know that a company called "mebomber" is making money off of his likeness?
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We need different colors. One for 'Consoomer', one for 'incel' and another that's just the "It's 2019, where's my superior future?" rant.
 
The fat miserable 40 year old and his "future" again....

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And as I keep saying, less Moviebob means less stupid.



I'll split the update into two (maybe three) separate posts to facillate quoting.


"Flattening criticism to a score" is suddenly "TERRIBLE for the medium and culture", when Bobby's fap material gets a low score:
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The emojis mean Bobby is totally joking. He can't seriously suggest he can't find see anything happening in Dune can he?
I'd be surprised if Moviebob can comprehend anything more compllicated than the concept of "C is for cookie, that's good enough for me".



Bobby is totally not partisan:
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I'd also watch Angelina Jolie being a badass. But I came here to witness Moviebob perpetually talking like a dumbass.



NYP is racist because they criticized an Asian unknown:
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"But we are shortsighted as fuck" is that extremely rare glimmer of honesty from Moviebob.



Bobby's self-awareness is being called to question. His Angels rush to his defense:
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Yup. Someone watched Cuties to own the cons.

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On the supposed relatedness between artistic merits and sociological merits, and how critics "get it wrong":
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Instead of labelling the film's detractors as MAGA trash, maybe Bobby should appeal to the learned demographic? Let the Esoteric Philosophy out of the bag please! If he can convince me to see the film I promise I'll donate $100 to Mermaids UK.
That's the big difference between major film critics like Roger Ebert and Moviebob: Ebert rarely, if ever, spoke down to his audience.



Let's begin this final section with the fallout of that laughable "I suffered for my knowledge so that other people don't have to" tweet:
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Maybe people didn't see the humor because there is none?
I didn't see any humor in that post, only self-pity.



Unfortunately, some kiddie fun just got canceled:
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If Moviebob was to be a guest at this convention, the guys at Penny Arcade may have done the entire southern U.S. a massive favor by cancelling its event.



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I'd much rather contemplate the putrefaction of a rat than to see anything by Brie Larson.
I'd much rather comtemplate a decaying rat than click on any of Moviebob's video content.



"I'll take 'Moviebob Blatantly Violating Twitter's TOS' for $500, Alex."



Bobby thinks the freeing of the slaves is an example of his idiosyncratic notion of "kicking the garbage out"
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TrueMetis is right. You can't compare firing a group of people en masse to genocide. "Misgendering", on the other hand...
"We freed the slaves"?

"We", Bob?

You didn't do a damned thing. If you're such a "student of history" (LOL!), you should have known that it was your team, the Democrats, that was responible for wanting to maintain slavery after the Civil War. It was also your team who rounded up Japanese-American citizens and placed them into concentration camps. And, if you'd actually get your head out from up your ass and breath oxygen for once in your life, IT'S YOUR TEAM that is borderline un-personing U.S. citizens who decline vaccination (job loss, denial of services, etc.), even if they have obtained natural immunities from having successfully beaten the Coof.

So, Bob, from the bottom of my heart…




Covid vaccine in children. As a consoomer, Bobby is dead set on Big Pharma's side.
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It is well known that covid has an extremely low mortality in children, and, conversely, the adverse cardiac side-effects are disproportionately high in this group. But let's forget all these Believer shit; just consoom jab and get excited for the next jab.
Remember: Moviebob only changed his mind on COVID-19 vaccine on January 19, 2021. If Donald Trump had been re-elected, he'd be actively calling all COVID-19 vaccines evil; but since Orange Man Bad™ no longer occupies the White House, all COVID-19 vaccines are now miracle drug that must be atomized and dispersed nationwide for mass innoculation, side effects be damned.



Noam Chomsky plans to save democracy, presumably through the Bob Chipman Tactic.

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Noam Chomsky supports bioligical warfare?



Tucker Carlson is not a person:
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Believe me: More people would care about Tucker Carlson than they would Moviebob.



"Cultural-aesthetic Fascism" Do you know the only source of traditional values is religion, i.e. superstition.
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You Mexican laborer are so dumb you don't even know where the butter-side is. If not for the white leisured-class cultural elites like Bobby who liberate you, you're long dead!
Bob's completely wrong here. His real issue is that socially conservative humans--or "humans" in quotes, as he meant to write--actually vote for their own self-interests before they would ever willingly vote for anything that props up Bob's self(ish)-interests.



The new season of Bobby's Angels features some big-name transvestites:
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On the flip side, the gays resent having to support shit like BLM and Free Palestine as part of the liberal package deal. If this goes on, "Gay for Trump 2024" will not be farfetched:
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If lightning actually did tell if you were naughty or nice... Bob would the current world record holder for times being struck at something-ty million and change.



Melenia made a groaning face at Trump's enthusiasm:
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Misogynistic Moviebob is misogynistic.



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No one cares whether it is racist or not, and it is not.
Nor should anyone care about political opinions of an idiotic Boston-area film critic who cosplays (quite badly) as an American.



Does Robert know that a company called "mebomber" is making money off of his likeness?
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My question: Why would anyone want to display Moviebob's vomit-inducing mug on their chest?
 
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Apart from twatter and Bobby here, I have see no people talking about this movie.
None of my friends, coworkers etc.
What is going to kill the MCU is not that the movie turn into shit but indiffrence.
Agreed. I don't expect that any Mahvel movies will ever turn out to be completely unwatchable garbage, including Eternals. There's always been a base level of competence at play: a basic yet coherent story, actors delivering their lines, cameras turned on and pointed at the scene, CGI fights and explosions, etc. I doubt that will change anytime soon, barring Disney going nutso and hiring someone like Neil Breen (god, can you imagine).

But it's that consistency and failure to push the envelope that will slowly but surely be its downfall. The coof threw a big wrench in the works and disrupted their plans to keep churning out three or four capeshit movies every year until the heat death of the universe, but even if it hadn't, general audiences would likely still be reaching their limit about now. Endgame really was a good place to stop, with the majority of plotlines resolved, the conclusion of the overarching story built up since the first Avengers movie, and endings for several of the most bankable characters. Hell, there wasn't even a post-credits scene to my recollection. It was the perfect time to ride off into the sunset, to go out on top, to have the legacy of the biggest shared cinematic universe of all time, likely never to be outdone.

But that's not how Hollywood works, and so now, to reference Dead Homer Society, we're in Zombie MCU. After spending the better part of a decade building up Thanos and finally delivering a payoff, Disney is now in a state of "what the fuck do we do now?" Maybe you could potentially compare this to the very beginning of the MCU when it took a few years to actually get to the first Thanos teaser, but that was when there was only one movie coming out every year on average, with the first hints of the Infinity Stones coming in Thor, the fourth movie overall. That was also when there wasn't anything to build off of yet; now that there's over a decade of movies (to say nothing of TV shows), there should at least be something that points towards where they're going next. From all I've seen of the plot synopses of Phase Four so far, there's jack shit. The only thing I can see by looking ahead to movies on the horizon is parallel universes and multiple timelines, but A, there's still nothing in the movies proper about that so that's cheating, and B, that's 100% going to turn into a clusterfuck.

I won't deny that a lot of this comes down to marketing, convincing people that they need to consoom product and get excited for next product. But when said product has to stand on its own merits and doesn't have that marketing hook of building up to the next big thing, audiences are left feeling kind of meh about it. By playing it safe all these years, Disney wrote their own ticket to a slow death by indifference. The coof only exacerbated this; by forcing people to go without their capeshit for over a year, it probably broke a lot of them out of the habit of ritualistically consooming the latest in the series. And without that compulsion driving them, it's no surprise people are meeting Phase Four with increasing indifference. The movies are still doing fine at the box office, but they're not doing gangbusters like Disney wants.

And thus, we get to Eternals. I'm not gonna act like a prognosticator and claim that I know how the box office is going to end up, nor am I going to go full clickbait and ask rhetorically "IS THIS GONNA BE THE FIRST MCU FLOP?!" But speaking as someone who watched everything through Endgame and jumped off there, there is absolutely nothing about Eternals that entices me to come back, to say nothing of the rest of Phase Four (Black Widow was too little too late and also dumb, and Shang-Chi gets a resounding "meh" from me). A sprawling cast that means most will get little more than the bare minimum character development, cryptic trailers that are more about acting mysterious than providing an interesting hook, and the same competent-but-tired CGI as a replacement for real actors doing actual things. As much as Bobby believes it's all a conspiracy and "filmbros" have it out for Marvel, it sounds to me like Eternals turned out to be just a meandering mess of a movie, and that's why it's not getting the standard positive reviews.

This turned out to be a lot more than I thought I was going to say about this topic (for someone who hasn't watched a Marvel movie in two and a half years, I sure can write a lot about them). I'll close by once again recommending Dune for those that want a big cinematic experience free from the trappings of quippy capeshit, and once again mocking Bob for his blatant consoomer shilling. An absolute fucking moron.
 
Bob you have no future. You do nothing to even better yourself to even give yourself a fighting chance. Nobody named you an authority in anything. Greatness was not thrust upon you. I don't have cartel or Crip connections that I orchestrate from my cell to keep you from greatness. Some white guy in South Dakota isn't cackling as he knows shooting a pheasant will hurt you on some level. Nobody else gave you diabetes. Nobody else keeps you miserable.

It's all YOUR fault bobbyboi.
A-fucking-men.

Bob and his ilk need to realize that the reason their lives suck is ALL their fault.

They chose to take the path of least resistance.

They chose to dress up and act like degenerates.

They chose to be a bunch of nerds, goths and etc, because they didn’t want to ‘conform to social norms’.

Honestly, for people who want to be ‘independent’, they act like they don’t have any free will.
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the face of man who has jerked off many, many times to Velma
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Is he talking about Velma dinkley?
 
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The cheeks keep collapsing in, the glasses get thicker prescriptions, his own body is telling him his face should not be. Yet he stands as tall as he can as his joints give way and the gut remains firmly in place, for he knows he has important work to finish. Eternals lives or dies by his tweets, so tweet he shall, forget the trick or treaters, he can only respond to troons wanting fake praise for their halloween costumes. Carry the torch, Blob, get Eternals to 60 million US box office with your insights!
 
"Hey Bro, let's take a photo. I got my rainbow mohawk on and my cum-stain shirt." "Sweet bro, I got my gigantic black tarp and grandma glasses I thought would make me hip but instead make me look like a gay." "Sweet, let's now eat 130 pounds of chocolate and ham." "Haha, hell yeah, bro. But I hope you don't mind me angry tweeting off and on during so. A ton of trumpers I gotta call believers."
 
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