Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[multiverse]

30 minutes? She couldn't wear barely heeled black ankle boots and a stretchy dress for more than 30 minutes, while walking to her apartment lobby, driving a car, and walking maybe one block?



(I know this was posted above, and more cleverly - but it’s buried in the post about the fugly woman-maybe troon who was friends with Ryann for 5 minutes a year ago)

 

[rocknrollmartian]

30 minutes? She couldn't wear barely heeled black ankle boots and a stretchy dress for more than 30 minutes, while walking to her apartment lobby, driving a car, and walking maybe one block?
View attachment 2678238


(I know this was posted above, andnmore cleverly - but it’s buried in the post about the fugly woman-maybe troon who was friends with Ryann for 5 minutes a year ago)

Pretty woman, waddling down the street. Pretty woman, the kind who likes to eat. I don't believe you,
you're not the truth. No one could look as fat as you!

 

[Water-T]

Pretty woman, waddling down the street. Pretty woman, the kind who likes to eat. I don't believe you,
you're not the truth. No one could look as fat as you!

Pretty woman, don't waddle by
Pretty woman, your odor make me cry
Pretty woman, please roll away, hey, okay

 

[My cravat doesn't flutter]

Tess should invest in some king flat sheets. Cut a hole in the middle for her head and a hole on either side for her arms. It'll look as good as anything else does on her.

 

[multiverse]

Pretty woman, waddling down the street. Pretty woman, the kind who likes to eat. I don't believe you,
you're not the truth. No one could look as fat as you!

Fatty woman, won't you pardon me?
Fatty woman, I couldn't help but see
Fatty woman, that your rolls are filthy as can be
Can you even see your feet?

 

[Smiling Honeybadger]

Pretty Woman was about a cheap whore, so Tess at least has that part down.

Interesting choice in costume, not that I recognised the "Pretty Woman" costume. She looked like an everyday white trash mom to me. Didn't even compute to me that it was a costume for Halloween.

But dressing up as a cheap whore who got hooked up by a millionaire and in the end even gets the dude. That's certainly an interesting choice in costume.

But I am wondering if she finds again someone stupid enough to sew a costume for her. Only to hold up for 30 minutes because she got fatter while you were sewing it. Or she gave you the wrong size.

 

[Oscar Winner]

Fatty woman, won't you pardon me?
Fatty woman, I couldn't help but see
Fatty woman, that your rolls are filthy as can be
Can you even see your feet?

Greasy woman, you sure like your fries.
Greasy woman, another slice of pie?
Greasy woman, you keep talking about HAES,
But you've blocked all your arteries...

 

[rocknrollmartian]

Gabifresh wore the same costume but actually put some effort into it:


Meanwhile, Tess probably thinks she actually looks like a "chubby" Julia Roberts in her prime, lmao.

 

[Polexia Aphrodisia]

So ironic that we regularly see Tess in outfits that invoke "hooker" far more than her "costume" did.

 

[NoReturn]

 

[Water-T]

View attachment 2679202

Back to eye-fucking herself AND trying to pass herself off as suffering from depression.

Yes, Tess - getting turned down by both British modelling agencies and blokes can be a bummer, but it doesn't count as "depression".

 

[multiverse]

View attachment 2679202

Yes, I'll bet it is depressing to wake up each day inside your bloated flesh prison, with nothing to do all day, and no money unless you are willing to let someone use your body as a sex toy. Days without purpose, without meaningful relationships, without interest in your children, where each step you take is torture but you can't stop eating your feelings because you lack coping skills. Being cruel to others doesn't change any of this, but it’s the only pleasure in your day besides eating.

She could take stock of her life and take action to improve it by spending less, and making a concrete plan to earn a more stable income, and invest in therapy to be the kind of partner she would want to meet.

But another crate of Jennis Ice Cream was just delivered, and she feels deserving of moddle jobs.

Stay sad, Ryann.

 

[yousoundlikeanasshole]

30 minutes? She couldn't wear barely heeled black ankle boots and a stretchy dress for more than 30 minutes, while walking to her apartment lobby, driving a car, and walking maybe one block?
View attachment 2678238


(I know this was posted above, and more cleverly - but it’s buried in the post about the fugly woman-maybe troon who was friends with Ryann for 5 minutes a year ago)

She was sick for a good part of her trip, and now is EXHAUSTED by parading around in her costume for 10 minutes? Sounds like a breakthrough of Covid.

 

[Cripple]

View attachment 2679202

Yeah I'm sure Rylee was very depressed after you said you wish you had aborted him. Stay sad bitch.

 

[multiverse]

She was sick for a good part of her trip, and now is EXHAUSTED by parading around in her costume for 10 minutes? Sounds like a breakthrough of Covid.

Sounds like Deathfat after exposure to fat-shaming European architecture and city layout; two non first class transatlantic flights; and upwards of 30 minutes on her feet.

 

[Water-T]

It's pathetic that Tess is suffering from rejection and jet lag, and is using it as an excuse to play the victim

LOOK AT ME TRYING TO APPEAR SAD WHILE EYE FUCKING MYSELF! ABLOO ABLOO ABLOO! SOMEONE WRITE A FLUFF ARTICLE ABOUT ME PLEASE!

 

[rocknrollmartian]

No parents I currently know, regardless of vax beliefs or "hesitancy," let their kids drink soda for breakfast or really very much at all, Tess. Most parents I know limit candy and most other processed crap as well. Stop projecting, heifer.

 

[NoReturn]

No parents I currently know, regardless of vax beliefs or "hesitancy," let their kids drink soda for breakfast or really very much at all, Tess. Most parents I know limit candy and most other processed crap as well. Stop projecting, heifer.

EXACTLY FUCKING THIS.

First, I'm so sick of this line of thinking, but second, Tess, only waddle-monsters and white trash like you do this to your children.

 

[Cheesegirl78]

I remember Tess feeding Bowie popcorn one morning because he didn't want to wait until she microwaved his breakfast.

 

[multiverse]

I remember Tess feeding Bowie popcorn one morning because he didn't want to wait until she microwaved his breakfast.

No, you ignoramus! That was PRE breakfast. The food you eat while waiting for your breakfast in the drive thru or microwave. Then breakfast, then second breakfast, then breakfast dessert, then brunch, then lunch, then lunch dessert, then first snack, then second snack, then supper, then dinner, then dinner dessert, then second dinner dessert, then TV snackies, then midnight snackies, then "keep mah suggahs up til morning" pre-bed snackies. Then wake up and do it again.

It's like you don't even know how to feed a healthy child. Bet your babies are all skinny little sticks!