Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

If he wasn't a complete ret4rd he could have used some of the gold belly money to hire a lawyer. And if he did have 400k, the payments wouldn't have been that bad. 7k a month in support and alimony for 2 years is 168k, plus the 92k lump sum still leaves him with 100k.

That's a sum most people won't ever have in one place at one time in their entire lives.
 
If he wasn't a complete ret4rd he could have used some of the gold belly money to hire a lawyer. And if he did have 400k, the payments wouldn't have been that bad. 7k a month in support and alimony for 2 years is 168k, plus the 92k lump sum still leaves him with 100k.

That's a sum most people won't ever have in one place at one time in their entire lives.
And yet Dickard had it, less than two years ago, and squandered it out of pure spite. He deliberately killed himself rather than support his kids. That's what an absolute piece of shit he was.
 
Imagine killing yourself over having to give your ex-wife and kids money instead of just embracing the broke homeless life so they wouldn't get anything and you could still be lazy and get high.

He couldn't even muster up the manhood to go running off into the woods to be a hobo who licks toads, breaks into people's garages, and lives in a hole in the ground shooting up transmission fluid.

He couldn't even man up and become a rail riding hobo posting from skeevy internet cafes about how he knifed a man for the last drink of whiskey in the bottle.

He couldn't even muster up the courage to move to a homeless drug camp in SF or some other urban shithole where he could lay around and shoot up heroin with Shadman.

Nope, just pop those pills, eat a Goldbelly pie, and wash it down with boxed wine and cause as much damage to your kids as possible.

Christ, what a contemptible faggot.
 
Ah, ok, didn't knew that. Thanks for the info. I wouldn't even click on a Vice article when I would get paid for.
For what it's worth (not even the disk space used to store the article), Vice did bother to call and get confirmation. We have confirmation from everyone now. He can't get any deader.
 
90k lump sum and 84k a year for a man who had savings but very little actual income at that point? His suicide makes more sense now. That'd have ruined him. I guess he spent all his money to live his best life knowing that soon it will come crashing down and when that day came, he ragequit. Don't have all that much pity, since he brought it onto himself, being a vile asshole to his women.

Also not all that bummed about his death either, but it feels odd seeing as how his site once was very important to me. Like one of the 5 or so sites you would visit each night on dialup to have some fun on the internet. I still think he was a very important person as far as the internet and its comedy goes.
Apparently he “owed the government money” too, according to the DMs posted above, which I’m assuming had to do with the IRS coming after him for unpaid taxes. That alone could make a person consider offing himself. Couple that with giant monthly alimony bills ($7K/ month? Seriously??) and a huge $90K lump sum due and that’s all, folks.
 
The Horrible Saga of swap.avi is still one of my favorite things I've ever read on the internet, ever. I still cry with laughter when I read it, and it would not be hyperbole to say that it changed my life. So thanks for that, and RIP
 
>Futa Snake
I recognize that name as someone who is somewhat notorious in Metal Gear Solid fan circles as a complete schizo coming up with fan theories about how all the characters are secretly trans and Kojima is tweeting coded messages at him. Wow, small world.
They're trans.

They're also still making long care posts on Lowtax's timeline. Still blaming everyone but Lowtax.
 
Imagine killing yourself over having to give your ex-wife and kids money instead of just embracing the broke homeless life so they wouldn't get anything and you could still be lazy and get high.
Pretty much this. What a ridiculous asshole. He could have continued to be exactly the idiot douchebag he always was and it would have been years of being a deadbeat before he even faced jail.

Instead he. . .oh wait I just thought of a joke.

What did Michelangelo and Lowtax have in common?

THEY BOTH SPENT THEIR LIVES PAINTING A CEILING!
 
If he wasn't a complete ret4rd he could have used some of the gold belly money to hire a lawyer. And if he did have 400k, the payments wouldn't have been that bad. 7k a month in support and alimony for 2 years is 168k, plus the 92k lump sum still leaves him with 100k.

That's a sum most people won't ever have in one place at one time in their entire lives.
Assuming he didn't get into shit with the MO Treasury and the IRS, i absolutely see him being broken enough to spite spend that money. In fact, one has to wonder if he ate all that Goldbelly trash and those potted meat sticks not out of necessity, but pure, unmetered spite.
 
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