Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[feral cat #6385]

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Just posting another stupid shop I made a while back before discovering this thread.

EDIT: Looking back on this image. Holy shit his arm has gotten so much worse. It almost looks normal here compared to recent videos and pictures of his.

Replace the flag with Garrett.

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

Sure ya did, Jack. Sure ya did...

 

[Aaway]

what the fuck is he talking about?

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Jack being impressed at Krogers having cheeses makes me think how his brain would explode if he went to a European cheese shop.

Or just a run of the mill cheese shop. If this is all it takes to impress him then he's easily impressed.

what the fuck is he talking about?

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He's just being a Qtard.

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

what the fuck is he talking about?

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Jack, I thought you were over politics? Go watch an NFL game and play in your fantasy league.


EDIT: How is Jack's fantasy league going?

 

[GentlemanFaggot]

what the fuck is he talking about?

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As far as I can tell, most likely it's Bridgestone Arena rescinding their mask policy.

Either way, I guess by Jack's wording we're not going to hear any more MAGIC TABLE jokes?

 

[Schmuck of Ages]

what the fuck is he talking about?

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You don't leave your home why do you care. Also plenty of places still ask for masks.

 

[stets]

what the fuck is he talking about?

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What happens next: people ask what the fuck he's talking about, Jack passive aggressively says that if you don't understand it then he's not going to explain it, more people pile on, and Jack boomers out and deletes the post out of frustration.

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

This will be me when Jack finally dies.

 

[stets]

This will be me when Jack finally dies.

Congrats on on pulling a clip from the best fucking movie of all time. If anyone ever wants to watch a great 3 hour and 15 minute movie that's so depressing that you'll want to kill yourself towards the end, watch Magnolia.

 

[Aaway]

Jack, I thought you were over politics? Go watch an NFL game and play in your fantasy league.


EDIT: How is Jack's fantasy league going?

no idea

there were a few of us who infiltrated it but he booted us before the draft. probably because he was matching the managers names with people he's friends with on FB. that way he can make sure no one calls him out when he has his co-commissioner help him cheat like last time

 

[Adamska]

no idea

there were a few of us who infiltrated it but he booted us before the draft. probably because he was matching the managers names with people he's friends with on FB. that way he can make sure no one calls him out when he has his co-commissioner help him cheat like last time

Bet he still lost because he's even worse at picking team members than Dan Schneider. He probably banned his "friends" too when they beat him.

 

[Ira the Weatherman]

I’m sure of it. If you beat your son for smoking weed, I’m sure he would be his wife for burning the pot roast. A lot of fundamental Christian types do that a lot.

I actually doubt that.

Let's get our facts straight here, Jack bragged about 'only' two occasions in which he put his hands on Garrett, with his son supposedly initiating both confrontations, with Stroke Chokem alleging that the devil's lettuce abruptly caused mood swings. The choking incident in particular was apparantly brought on by Garrett attacking Tammy, and Jack admits that he lost his shit and lunged at his son in a fit of rage. Now, I'm not bringing this up to excuse or justify Jack's behavior, but rather that, while showing him being a terrible father, it's not exactly evidence that Jack was a habitual physical abuser.

Keeo in mind that Jack isn't actually a stern Christian paterfamilias. He's a weak hypocrite larping as one. He only adopted the Bible-thumping to get with his wife-to-be and then took it to the umpteenth level, like a shitty Walter Sobchak, but without actually practicing what he preaches. He's a gluttonous, spiteful scrounger who harps on about continence, love and work ethic. In everything we've seen him in, he acts like a petulant, entitled toddler with little self-awareness or regard for others.

One thing you can say for sure about Jack is that his delusional and selfish need to project a certain image harms the people around him. Him trying to be a traditionalist father fucked over Garrett and Jr. in the short term, and his Youtube career act involves wasting Tammy's time and money and alienating what few friends they had.

Going back to Garrett, it's one thing for family members to get into a physical altercation. Shit can happen. But it's another to act like a moralizing cunt and effectively disown them over it, severing ties indefinitely, only to brag about it years later because you think it'll please your fundie hosts, and you're that fucking desperate for validation that you'll go there.

 

[Skeletor]

ngl, Kroger does sometimes have a surprisingly decent cheese section for a basic US grocery store. Obviously any Euro shop would blow the doors of it, but still.

 

[TurdFondler]

Stroke Chokem

Someone please, PLEASE do a smash cut of the raw meats Jack has served set to the Duke Nukem theme.

 

[The Cunting Death]

This will be me when Jack finally dies.

You're quite possibly one of the biggest A Logs I've ever seen

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

This looks like pure shit.

 

[Compositesludge]

This looks like pure shit.

Keto M&M's, nice.

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

Keto M&M's, nice.

Everything is keto when you don’t know what’s keto is.

 

[Ihatejackscalfani]

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone.