Shit that you overheard during Thanksgiving (2021)

Found out the moment I got to my granny’s condo that my brother didn’t show up this year because he hates my sister for doing lefty white girl shit, and that basically killed my enthusiasm for showing up in the first place.

Despite missing the dinner proper, at least no one gave me a hard time about not wearing a mask and not getting jabbed. Stuck around for maybe two hours and now I’m upstate getting progressively drunker with my cousins and reminiscing about a time when I used to look forward to this holiday all year.
 
  • Feels
  • Like
Reactions: ApeBass, Rockafire Ass Explosion, soggy london and 4 others
Spending thanksgiving at my first NFL football game. Parents gifted me their season tickets. The American in me wants to appreciate this but never again. I’d rather be concocting weird dishes from thanksgiving leftovers.
 
  • Feels
Reactions: Foreverial and soggy london
the turkey wasn't _bad_ per se, but tasted oddly pork-like
our theory is that instead of the usual Chinese steroids they doped them up this year on a different source
 
  • Thunk-Provoking
Reactions: Foreverial
Ate the normal turkey spread with my immediate family and then met my bf's mom's side of the family for the first time.
They're a bit rowdy but genuine people and certainly not a group to walk on eggshells around which is great.

Except for the thirty year old cousin in a wheelchair that is fucked up from a brain tumor who I swear thought I was an autist because I whispered to her when I talked to her instead of the rest of her loudass hyena aunts.

In other news I frantically threw together two pumpkin pies faster than I ever have and they were somehow the best I've ever made.
 
  • Feels
  • Like
Reactions: BIG BILL HELL'S, cowboytakeshi, Some Badger and 3 others
spinch said:
i had a child try to rip a piercing out of my face because i'd look better without it.
i also had one of my spouse's family members look at me with disdain and say my tattoos were "interesting"
i got a call from my grandmother asking why it was such a big deal to drive several hundred miles to her condemned trailer to eat with her. she revealed she still has not disposed of her dog's corpse.

other than that it was a pretty uneventful holiday. i'm glad i didn't spend it with my side of the family because that shit is always a nightmare.
Click to expand...
update: went to 7-11 for gas. an obese black child had four snapples and several bags of ruffles. he paid with a PICTURE OF AN EBT CARD on his I-Phone that the cashier typed in. He then pulled a 20 out of his pocket, asked for $20 on a pump, and then pumped gas into his mom's van.

what the fuck man
 
  • Thunk-Provoking
  • Horrifying
  • Informative
Reactions: Aunt Carol, Emet-Selch, A Series Of Tubes and 11 others
Honka Honka Burning Love said:
If I may aid you with a bit of writing.

"An Elvis in clown make up told me to tell you He thinks you are a Nigger, and I agree with him." might be the greatest phrase said in any thansgiving dinner ever.
Click to expand...
I regret to inform you that I did not call him a nigger at the dinner table, which I guess makes me the nigger. I did, however, tell him that if he thought that the United States government stepping in to make social media companies not ban people with bad opinions would ever work, then he was more retarded than I ever thought possible.

My partner made me leave after his dad started saying that Gab was the future and Andrew Torba was "really doing something about this problem," and I said Torba was a useless faggot that has invented nothing, Gab is garbage, and asked him if he was inbred because he believes in the Q Boomer shit.

I really wish I had seen this post before all that because telling him that clown world Elvis thinks he's a nigger might have made him have a stroke.

I can't wait until Christmas.
 
  • Autistic
  • Winner
  • Like
Reactions: Cpl. Long Dong Silver, noshootpupper, Rockafire Ass Explosion and 3 others
spinch said:
update: went to 7-11 for gas. an obese black child had four snapples and several bags of ruffles. he paid with a PICTURE OF AN EBT CARD on his I-Phone that the cashier typed in. He then pulled a 20 out of his pocket, asked for $20 on a pump, and then pumped gas into his mom's van.

what the fuck man
Click to expand...
Thanks Gibmedats
 
  • Like
Reactions: A Series Of Tubes, Autistic Joe and murph
me and my family got all of our politisperging out of our systems yesterday so today was pretty comfy. we all helped with cooking and most stuff got prepped the day before so hardly any work.
I made homemade eggnog so that was bomb and a family favorite
 
  • Feels
Reactions: soggy london, cowboytakeshi, Autistic Joe and 3 others
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back