Tess Holliday / Ryann Maegen Hoven - Beached Landwhale model, Body positive and social justice snacktivist, and gigantic fraud

[Crepidodera fulvicornis]

Is my background biasing me or is that actually not that big a deal? It just looks like an owie, hardly even a boo-boo at worst.

Being a mobfag sometimes can be spooky.

 

[NoReturn]

Being a mobfag sometimes can be spooky.
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LMAO Jesus christ, took me a second.

 

[Water-T]

Can you imagine being Tess' dad, hearing his daughter make barnyard noises and aromas in the next room over as she "tests" her newest product while she fantasizes about her half-brother?

Never have I pitied someone so much.

 

[Theladyinblack]

Only trailer trash like Tess thinks that trying to seduce a barely-out-of-his-teens blood relative under the roof of her father's house is "cute".

She really is a morally unsing and aberrant being.

Nah, Bowie is there, I just went and had a look.
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Also found whatever this is...
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And I'm starting to think Tess really shouldn't be sharing old photos of herself anymore, because obviously we're going to compare them to what she looks like now, and it makes her look huuugggge (my phone wanted to correct that to luggage, lol)
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Her face was really beautiful and she threw it away. Her health and autonomy from her body. If you have a normal body and a beautiful face, you are beautiful. If you have a hot body and an ugly face, you are ugly. Tori Spelling would have been happy with the former.

 

[ggalin]

She really is a morally unsing and aberrant being.


Her face was really beautiful and she threw it away. Her health and autonomy from her body. If you have a normal body and a beautiful face, you are beautiful. If you have a hot body and an ugly face, you are ugly. Tori Spelling would have been happy with the former.

she also looked wayyyy cute before bowie. she had so much time to change and work on her behaviour and weight.

 

[Owlflaps]

she also looked wayyyy cute before bowie. she had so much time to change and work on her behaviour and weight.

Having a kid usually forces you to mature, but not for our girl Tess. Motherhood too much? Just offload the kids on a nanny while you party it up! She could have done any number of things. The problem is she's a gross, malignant, lazy narc.

 

[multiverse]

Tess NEVER eats burgers and deep fried foods, guys! She ONLY eats those things in Mississippi. Any time we've seen her snarfing shitty burgers and fries was a figment of our imaginations.



And it seems that she's not even sticking around for Thanksgiving at her dad's place. Instead, she's hanging with an old friend from high school who collects vintage home goods and glassware snd owns a beautiful home, and basically has the life Ryann always aspired to. Her friend was even kind enough to buy her book and use it for decorating during Ryann's visit.

Sounds like her family is thoroughly burned out from her.

 

[FuckDuckSeagull]

What is that fried thing? Deep fried okra?

LoL "I rarely eat burgers". No1curr bitch, we've seen your diet of junk and booze.

 

[Cripple]

Tess NEVER eats burgers and deep fried foods, guys! She ONLY eats those things in Mississippi. Any time we've seen her snarfing shitty burgers and fries was a figment of our imaginations.
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And it seems that she's not even sticking around for Thanksgiving at her dad's place. Instead, she's hanging with an old friend from high school who collects vintage home goods and glassware snd owns a beautiful home, and basically has the life Ryann always aspired to. Her friend was even kind enough to buy her book and use it for decorating during Ryann's visit.

Sounds like her family is thoroughly burned out from her.
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Tess is 100% one of those people who will get in a ten car deep In n Out line.

And good lord she looks like a fat(ter) Kelly Clarkson circa 2005 in that photo.

 

[Water-T]

What is that fried thing? Deep fried okra?

LoL "I rarely eat burgers". No1curr bitch, we've seen your diet of junk and booze.

Exactly. So you don’t eat burgers? That doesn’t matter if you’re still slamming down pints of Jeni’s ice cream and several bags of candy.

 

[𝕺𝖑' 𝕯𝖎𝖗𝖙𝖞 𝕱𝖆𝖙𝖘𝖔]

What is that fried thing? Deep fried okra?

LoL "I rarely eat burgers". No1curr bitch, we've seen your diet of junk and booze.

I think they're pickles.

Exactly. So you don’t eat burgers? That doesn’t matter if you’re still slamming down pints of Jeni’s ice cream and several bags of candy.

At least a burger has some protein in it, ffs

 

[No Thank You]

What is that fried thing? Deep fried okra?

I think they're pickles.

She appears to be at a place called Phillip’s Drive In, and they serve fried okra.

 

[gampboonerisms]

Its okra. Damn i miss fried okra.

 

[NoReturn]

Happy Thanksgiving from Tess:

Video of Rachael's house:

 

[Umaibae]

Is she having Bowie take those photos?

 

[Ophelia Jones]

Are those giant rainbow crocs? That‘s cursed.

 

[Smiling Honeybadger]

Just a fanciful idea.... How about helping your mum hanging up the bird feeder, instead of mocking her that she is doing it now after pestering "Poppa" hanging it up?! And nice blasting this and the house of her mum allover the internet.

And how about we form the tiniest sad violin Kiwi Orchestra for Tess dramatic and inspiring life story.

So inspiring no to:

- lie about Your past. No one wanted anything to do with You, not because you were the weirdo, but a mean girl bully. Your own brother kindly spilled the beans.

Sidenote: when in that timeline were you exactly anorexic?

- hop on a fad by dumb luck and royally fucking it up by:

- Lie about Your size.
- Bea bitch to everyone you deem beneath You.
- badmouth clients and agencies.
- get constantly fatter and outgrowing all plus sizes. And still lying about Your size.
- be a narc bitch of the highest caliber, while having the personality of wet card board.
- have no qualities, talents or skills to fall back on when the model gigs dry up.
- have some savings or financial plans.
- play pretend, when it gets painfully obvious that you are a has been and the bottom of the barrel in LA hierarchy.

Better look at Tess' mom, who:

- took care of Rylee, and most likely gave him the advantage to know that there are different parenting models than "self-absorbed Narczilla-Mom".
- got shot in the fucking head by an abusive ex and recovered.
- is recovering from strokes.
- had -at least to our knowledge- never sit on cakes for LA sex weirdos, to keep up the facade of a successful life in Hollywood.

 

[Flawmil]

Is she having Bowie take those photos?

She’s taking them herself using a timer. If I was her family member I would clown on her so hard for being that cringey. Taking a thousand pics of yourself in your family house and then posting them on Instagram with stupid motivational paragraphs. I wonder if her family walked in on her posing in their hallway or backyard…

 

[Owlflaps]

Happy Thanksgiving from Tess:
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Video of Rachael's house:
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That thing must have creaked hard when she leaned on it.

 

[GrouchiCorn]

Happy Thanksgiving! Look at my tits!
Ugh.. she can't even wear a shirt for a family gathering? yuck