DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Surly Muppet]

It's funny that in the last month or so almost all discussion about Phil's streams has dropped to simply a summary at the end. He's reached the point of being so boring even us autists can't watch him.

I know I bring this up often, but LSB theorized back when he was restreaming, and maybe heard it from some of Phil's mods, that Phil was fine with becoming 'boring', often stopping things that he knew were entertaining, as a means to deter detractors from watching or restreaming him. He may have actually sabotaged his own streams in order to bore us, knowing full well that he could rely on a handful of wheelchairs to support him while he offered them objectively bad content.

That said, watching him try to steal specific cars for the garage collections in Vice City is an interesting window into how Phil operates when he encounters trouble.
He has no knowledge, despite repeatedly playing these games, of what the "Idaho" car looks like. This shows that he pays no attention to the details in these games (this particular car looked the same in every 3D iteration). This is also something that chat can't really help him with, and Phil is too stupid to do something like bring up an image on Google on the laptop he has right next to him. So now we enter into "Phil has to Problem Solve By Himself". What do we get?

Phil starts jacking every vehicle to see their names. When they aren't the right car, he just gets out and runs to another car. This creates significant problems as pedestrians then get angry and will pull him out of other cars. This also creates a huge backlog of empty cars jamming the street. This also attracts police attention. Phil doesn't care because he is on a retarded mission to find what he wants, fuck the game mechanics, and fuck taking it slow or steady.

So even when Phil finds a car he needs, he struggles to drive because there is a graveyard of cars around him and pedestrians ripping him out of it. To make matters worse, he isn't paying attention and retains no information, so he'll jack the same kind of car three times in a row because he didn't process that it wasn't the one he wanted. Then there are so many cars in an area that the game slows the spawn rate, so Phil has no additional cars around him to grab.

And what do we get now? Phil whining that this mission, a staple of the 3D GTA games, is boring. This is entirely the game's fault. It has nothing to do with Phil being lazy, sloppy, ignorant, and refusing to learn or adapt. A glimmer of the old This is How You Don't Play is seen for a fleeting second...

 

[Tsoliassssssssssssss]

he can run away from Jose and Goji.

1) dodge Gogitenks
2) dodge Jose (already a failed mission I believe - bugged dodging mechanics dood)
3) only play scrubs

Jose offered to buy gogitenks a copy of whatever street fighter this is on xbox. I think both were on an1337's stream last Friday.
the xbox version of the game have an option to block people from joining your lobby, or you joining their lobby, so I think that the jose/gogi saga is over.

 

[Let's recap the situation]

I'm going to single you out without naming you, and I'm going to trash your content, but don't ever do the same to me, that's punching down buddy.

 

[NursezillaX]

I'm going to single you out without naming you, and I'm going to trash your content, but don't ever do the same to me, that's punching down buddy.

View attachment 2795475

Good god this dude is totally incapable of talking about anybody without his jealousy over the money they make being shoehorned into it.

 

[LieLieFyre]

Question for the KiwiFart community.

How many of you play games on the hardest difficulty?

I havent played anything under the hardest difficulty for over a decade.
Old FPS shooters would slap your bitch ass around if you up the difficulty.

Phil plays Halo on normal "as intended by the developers" and its insane how many shots you takes before actually dying.

Don't really care about difficulty It's more about fun and using interesting playing styles. I mean i try and beat all games on hardest at least once (Halo MC collection legendary solo was hell) but the only times i only use hardest is if it makes really no difference (fallout games except it kinda does in 3 i guess cause extra xp). Interesting playing styles means using non conventional builds and playing shooters like you're making a montage and anything else interesting your brain might make up (challenge runs included).

 

[Dona Morte]

Eyes downcast all the time Phil dashes off to protect his MARRIAGE!

 

[King of Gout]

Manchild actually left the stream because he is married, dood! Apparently Kat is jealous of polygoms.

 

[Elescondido]

I'm going to single you out without naming you, and I'm going to trash your content, but don't ever do the same to me, that's punching down buddy.

View attachment 2795475

Who is he talking about btw?

 

[Flavius Anthemius]

Currently his chat is kinda losing itself telling Phil that he should look up a guide for Vice City to find the right cars (the Esparanto) for the collection missions, Phil's obviously just trying to brute force his way with these missions by picking as many cars as possible and not thinking about specifically where he should go, Derish gave him this brilliant suggestion.

After 5 minutes just aimlessly driving around, he's still trying to find this damn hotel, he doesn't even know where downtown vice city is. He's just walked into a strip club because clearly he doesn't know what else to do with himself. He has to do a lap dance or something on this stripper to get a costume, but before that he went to blow his nose because couldn't stand looking at this stoopid character model.

Despite getting a $200 dollar super chat, and receiving $114 in tips, he still said it's unfortunate he couldn't reach the tips goal and wanted to wear the vest if he could. He also lets us know that he's never been to a strip club in real life and that he's always thought it's a waste of time and completely stupid. But Phil you've said you've been to casinos and stuff before surely with some other forms of muhture aduhlt entertainment, surely it can't be that different?

And also just towards the end of the stream this particular super chat showed up right as he was clocking off.

And what do you know, Phil already stopped recording, he's already telling his viewers to catch him in the lost judgement stream, then the idiot commented these once Phil was about to leave.

Thanks for the money, dummy, no super chat shout out for you.

Edit: Big ups to blooper world order for catching the parts where his greed is in full swing, it really didn't phase him at al how that Superchat was one of the largest in a fairly long time, yet he went on a tirade constantly that he needs more tips because, you know it's al for his bills and stuff.

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

I know I bring this up often, but LSB theorized back when he was restreaming, and maybe heard it from some of Phil's mods, that Phil was fine with becoming 'boring', often stopping things that he knew were entertaining, as a means to deter detractors from watching or restreaming him. He may have actually sabotaged his own streams in order to bore us, knowing full well that he could rely on a handful of wheelchairs to support him while he offered them objectively bad content.

Phil cutting his gouty nose off to spite his gin face. Despite his uptick in "subscribers", his begging of his "viewers" to not leave when he went to take a break earlier proves that he's sabotaged himself to avoid attracting unwarranted attention for his schemes. Just wait until the new year when those subscriber numbers drop again because a certain someone wasn't able to resub under every account.

Currently his chat is kinda losing itself telling Phil that he should look up a guide for Vice City to find the right cars (the Esparanto) for the collection missions, Phil's obviously just trying to brute force his way with these missions by picking as many cars as possible and not thinking about specifically where he should go, Derish gave him this brilliant suggestion.

View attachment 2795487

After 5 minutes just aimlessly driving around, he's still trying to find this damn hotel, he doesn't even know where downtown vice city is. He's just walked into a strip club because clearly he doesn't know what else to do with himself. He has to do a lap dance or something on this stripper to get a costumer, but before that he went to blow his nose because couldn't stand looking at this stoopid character model.

View attachment 2795493

Phil obviously becoming bored with the mission after shooting himself in the foot YET AGAIN. Seriously, how can you become bored in a GTA game? If you don't want to do the missions, fuck around and cause havoc, or just drive around and experience the atmosphere of the game. I did that with the original games while listening to the radio.

Oh wait, this is Phil we're talking about. He couldn't be bothered to come up with that idea, and modify it to be able to chat with his audience while driving around and connecting with them.

There has to be a better word than "dullard" to describe Phil at this point.

 

[Salubrious]

This is slightly off topic, and probably a bit pinwheel, but I've been looking into, shall we say, investment opportunities as a way to increase my income, and it really dawned on me just how badly DSP fucked up the CT Condo situation.

I mean, yeah, no shit Sherlock of course. But DSP was making $200K-$250K/year at his peak. He could have easily paid off that condo, rented it out with the help of a property management company, and made an easy $10K/year for the rest of his life. The all-inportant "passive income." Instead, not only did he let it go into foreclosure, but he left it empty for 4 years and just kept paying the bare minimum on it as just another "bill." And I am convinced he would still just be doing it now in 2021 if in an alternate universe he was still with Machinima or at least making the same money.

Then, we'll never know the real story, but his own version of the story is that he couldn't rent it out because he couldn't find a single "good" property management company. The story about how he DQed one company because they called instead of emailed will always, to me at least, be one of the most underrated yet major events of his entire life.

 

[N0thingICanDo]

End of stream summary:

Total tip: $114

Top tip: Caller ($50)

Despite $200 superchat, we are back to the state of "if Caller didn't tip me $50 we'd have a very slow day stream, and I can't afford it after already having one of my slowest stream last night, okay?"

Not much happening in Chat except Derich cooming out autism constantly and chat asking Phil about his experience in strip clubs

He also missed multiple suprchats because it doesn't matter to him if it's not tips

 

[Watamelon]

Which is funny because if you know anything about fightsticks you know all that matters is the stick and buttons, and even cheaper sticks come with Sanwa sticks and buttons that feel great. In fact if I remember right there's something weird about Hori sticks, I think they use an unusual type of button that isn't as good as Sanwa (could be wrong on that, and may only apply to a specific stick but I remember there was some reason I didn't buy a hori).

Horis buttons and levers are perfectly fine. Hell, the stick he had before, the RAP 4 uses a Sanwa.

They use an in house solution called Hayabusa which work perfectly fine but are a touch more sensitive, requiring less force to push them down.

I get it, this is laughing at DSP. But HORI is an amazing brand, at least, stick wise.

Hori's the most marketed brand for fight sticks and as we all know most popular brand = best quality.

It's not the most marketed brand, it's just well liked.

The most marketed brand is probably Razer (which holds the trophy of a grand finals malfunction during EVO) or the now defunct MadCatz, although they were getting back.

What should he buy? An old TE that goes for hundreds? A Panthera that is unreliable? Shell double for a Panzer or a Qanba, if they're even in stock? Import a Korean stick so he's not used to the lever?

 

[Forbidden Math]

I know I bring this up often, but LSB theorized back when he was restreaming, and maybe heard it from some of Phil's mods, that Phil was fine with becoming 'boring', often stopping things that he knew were entertaining, as a means to deter detractors from watching or restreaming him. He may have actually sabotaged his own streams in order to bore us, knowing full well that he could rely on a handful of wheelchairs to support him while he offered them objectively bad content.

That said, watching him try to steal specific cars for the garage collections in Vice City is an interesting window into how Phil operates when he encounters trouble.
He has no knowledge, despite repeatedly playing these games, of what the "Idaho" car looks like. This shows that he pays no attention to the details in these games (this particular car looked the same in every 3D iteration). This is also something that chat can't really help him with, and Phil is too stupid to do something like bring up an image on Google on the laptop he has right next to him. So now we enter into "Phil has to Problem Solve By Himself". What do we get?

Phil starts jacking every vehicle to see their names. When they aren't the right car, he just gets out and runs to another car. This creates significant problems as pedestrians then get angry and will pull him out of other cars. This also creates a huge backlog of empty cars jamming the street. This also attracts police attention. Phil doesn't care because he is on a retarded mission to find what he wants, fuck the game mechanics, and fuck taking it slow or steady.

So even when Phil finds a car he needs, he struggles to drive because there is a graveyard of cars around him and pedestrians ripping him out of it. To make matters worse, he isn't paying attention and retains no information, so he'll jack the same kind of car three times in a row because he didn't process that it wasn't the one he wanted. Then there are so many cars in an area that the game slows the spawn rate, so Phil has no additional cars around him to grab.

And what do we get now? Phil whining that this mission, a staple of the 3D GTA games, is boring. This is entirely the game's fault. It has nothing to do with Phil being lazy, sloppy, ignorant, and refusing to learn or adapt. A glimmer of the old This is How You Don't Play is seen for a fleeting second...

Jesus, only in a DSP playthrough could that specific scenario happen.

 

[NursezillaX]

Currently his chat is kinda losing itself telling Phil that he should look up a guide for Vice City to find the right cars (the Esparanto) for the collection missions, Phil's obviously just trying to brute force his way with these missions by picking as many cars as possible and not thinking about specifically where he should go, Derish gave him this brilliant suggestion.

View attachment 2795487

After 5 minutes just aimlessly driving around, he's still trying to find this damn hotel, he doesn't even know where downtown vice city is. He's just walked into a strip club because clearly he doesn't know what else to do with himself. He has to do a lap dance or something on this stripper to get a costumer, but before that he went to blow his nose because couldn't stand looking at this stoopid character model.

View attachment 2795493

Despite getting a $200 dollar super chat, and receiving $114 in tips, he still said it's unfortunate he couldn't reach the tips goal and wanted to wear the vest if he could. He also lets us know that he's never been to a strip club in real life and that he's always though it's a waste of time and completely stupid. But Phil you've said you've been to casinos and stuff before surely with some other forms of muhture aduhlt entertainment, surely it can't be that different?

And also just towards the end of the stream this particular super chat showed up right as he was clocking off.

View attachment 2795509
And what do you know, Phil already stopped recording, he's already telling his viewers to catch him in the lost judgement stream, then the idiot commented these once Phil was about to leave.

View attachment 2795510
View attachment 2795513
Thanks for the money, dummy, no super chat shout out for you.

At this point, I'm totally fine with seeing him shit on or ignore the pay piglets after they give him literally hundreds of dollars as a reward for a few hours of the laziest, shittiest tier content there is. They're obviously gonna give him money regardless of how much of an ingrate he responds to them as, so might as well get a laugh at what masochistic losers with zero self-respect they are when they come right back and do it again tomorrow.

 

[Mask_de_SMITH]

I was catching up on all the identity fraud shenanigans from today and figured I’d do a little digging after this jogged my memory.

It’s not exactly what you describe, but here is a gem of a tweet from this mature adult with a business degree™

View attachment 2770244
Hydrate with water? As opposed to what, your usual Gin? Baby Burnell gets tired from 2 hours of real work.

While digging I also came across this tweet; just surpassed the one year anniversary.

View attachment 2770327
Shout out to the beautiful, amazing @Nigel of Ukip (fuck Derish) for the distinction as the only KF to feature on DSPs timeline.
If you participate in crimes against DSP, you will go to jail!… unless that crime is identity theft and fraud, of course! Then there is just nothing the police can do!

Also, just to let everyone know, it’s incredibly easy to search DSPs tweets on Twitters mobile apps. I never cared enough to use advanced search on a desktop, but a little while ago Twitter added this search button in the upper right of any profile.

View attachment 2770260

For instance, you can use the search function to search for every time DSP wrote ‘Leanna’ in a tweet.

Spoiler: Leanna tweets example

View attachment 2770270

And lastly, we all know DSP turned off his replies on his Twitter a few months ago; however, it appears all his tweets prior to that point people can still respond. Would be a real shame if some mentally ill detractor lurker were to reply to Phil’s old tweets reminding him of his life before WWE champions, Gin, and DoorDash totally consumed what little humanity he had left.

In all seriousness, it’s helpful to quickly find contradictions or remember something e.g. boasting about winning chargebacks against Tut as was discussed a page ago

Spoiler: Tut chargeback tweet

View attachment 2770386

How the fuck is DSP going to get anyone in trouble for saying mean words when:

• He can't afford to do it because (by his own admission) he's constantly broke.
• When he got caught saying nigger twice.

 

[Sy Sperling]

Question for the KiwiFart community.

How many of you play games on the hardest difficulty?

I havent played anything under the hardest difficulty for over a decade.
Old FPS shooters would slap your bitch ass around if you up the difficulty.

Phil plays Halo on normal "as intended by the developers" and its insane how many shots you takes before actually dying.

It's the only way I play games. I think it's fun to get my dick knocked off in video games.

 

[Forbidden Math]

Horis buttons and levers are perfectly fine. Hell, the stick he had before, the RAP 4 uses a Sanwa.

They use an in house solution called Hayabusa which work perfectly fine but are a touch more sensitive, requiring less force to push them down.

I get it, this is laughing at DSP. But HORI is an amazing brand, at least, stick wise.



It's not the most marketed brand, it's just well liked.

The most marketed brand is probably Razer (which holds the trophy of a grand finals malfunction during EVO) or the now defunct MadCatz, although they were getting back.

What should he buy? An old TE that goes for hundreds? A Panthera that is unreliable? Shell double for a Panzer or a Qanba, if they're even in stock? Import a Korean stick so he's not used to the lever?

Double for Qanba? In what market? The stick a fan allegedly sent him cost $200, the Qanba Obsidian is literally the same price.

 

[EmpGulcasa]

I haven't even watched DSP in forever, but is he even any better with the stick than he is with a controller? Does he claim to like it more? Personally I am way better with a stick and enjoy it infinitely more, and during the one or two hours a month I play vidya I use it for everything I possibly can, including non fighters. But I know a lot of folks are the opposite or just don't feel comfortable using them.

I am legitimately curious now to know if he is noticeably any better with one, if he actually enjoys it over the pad, or if he is just being a poser and using it because he has seen that it is what all the actual "professional" fighting gamers use. I guess I'll have an answer if he starts shilling a Hitbox.

He's just as bad with every type of controller.

 

[DZoomer]

if Caller didn't tip me $50 we'd have a very slow day stream, and I can't afford it after already having one of my slowest stream last night, okay?

I always wonder what would happen if people called this pig's bluff and decided to see what is his point exactly. What do you mean with "you can't afford it", Phil? What would happen if you had 7 consecutive days of sub-50 streams, for example?

Sadly, we'll probably never actually see this happening because there'll always be some retarded whale around. But that's one of the things that I'd love to watch.

"Can't afford it", lol. The nerve of this pig, as if people have some responsibility to bankroll him.