DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Coke Zero]

I particularly enjoyed the way he called the higher ranked lobbies the "tryhard lobbies" and then realized he just indirectly insulted the fan he was playing with, and had to throw him a few compliments. Really funny how he's a "true genuine gamer" when convenient, but when he comes across actually dedicated passionate gamers who climb rankings in competitive games he talks down to them, calls them tryhards, no-life losers etc.

Cry more, DarkysdeBitchtits.

The thing I don't get whenever phil talks about game difficulty or skill or anything like that, is phil literally plays video games all day every day, how are you not any good at them yet??? I don't care what it is, if you spent the tens of thousands of hours that phil has spent on video games, I'd expect you to be pretty good at that thing. He does the whole cope about he's just a casual gamer or whatever but no, he plays way more video games than most people do or ever will.

And I dont care if the specific games change, a lot of skill carries over for games of the same genre. Phil acts like playing a new FPS for example means having to re-learn how to play a FPS completely from scratch.

I just don't understand how he is so bad at something he spends so much time on. It doesn't even make sense. Like at some point he should improve just due to repetition and pattern recognition at the very least but no, he still sucks.

 

[GreySydeDave]

Phil has no relationship and Phil has no family, a bloody russian ma order bride and cat don't count.

Usually, when you buy yourself a Russian Bride, you got to have sex, it's the point of it, besides showing off. I wouldn't bet he does, I mean, the guy is literally rotting day after day, and exhausted after playing Halo for 2 x 3 hours, including a 30 minutes break...

 

[The Penultimate Warrior]

The thing I don't get whenever phil talks about game difficulty or skill or anything like that, is phil literally plays video games all day every day, how are you not any good at them yet??? I don't care what it is, if you spent the tens of thousands of hours that phil has spent on video games, I'd expect you to be pretty good at that thing. He does the whole cope about he's just a casual gamer or whatever but no, he plays way more video games than most people do or ever will.

And I dont care if the specific games change, a lot of skill carries over for games of the same genre. Phil acts like playing a new FPS for example means having to re-learn how to play a FPS completely from scratch.

I just don't understand how he is so bad at something he spends so much time on. It doesn't even make sense. Like at some point he should improve just due to repetition and pattern recognition at the very least but no, he still sucks.

Depends on how you play the games though. If you spent years playing FPS games on easy you'll still struggle as soon as you turn the difficulty up, just as he learns nothing on SF because he only plays people he can easily beat.

 

[Iron Hamster]

View attachment 2799063
"Physically drained" from playing Halo for 6 hours

That is some uber cringe faggotry.

Two things: 1) use pigpiggo and look up "extra money". The number of times it's come up in the last 5 years is something else. 2) Searching "Christmas money" brought up a quiplash stream from Jan 2017 (should be timestamped):

Suggests that it could be from Christmas 2016.

The 'snort money' made me laugh.

 

[Nigel of Ukip]

Usually, when you buy yourself a Russian Bride, you got to have sex, it's the point of it, besides showing off. I wouldn't bet he does, I mean, the guy is literally rotting day after day, and exhausted after playing Halo for 2 x 3 hours, including a 30 minutes break...

I will always find it funny that Phil of all people had a bird that was ten years younger and a nympho, and he used her to cook and clean. Imagine your bird has to tell random people online on some random forum about not getting laid.
Mate I'm positive that even if Phil had stamina and wouldn't get exhausted just from existing he still couldn't give any girl a good dicking. I'm certain he has some form of erectile dysfunction, and has had it for a while. There is no way a bloke can be this insecure about sex, nudity and romance less he can't perform.

 

[Pargon]

imagine simping for someone else for money. LUL

DSP and his community continue to push the limits of Poe’s Law. Even with my natural disdain for fellow human life I’m having difficulty settling on whether or not shit like this is trolling.

 

[Chandler Bing]

Hopefully Halo isn't broken because of lazy developers like CoD was, and you cant simply quit 2-3 matches in a row to get out of random matches with people with bad connection!

I'm in my 30s now and I just dont understand the care about any of this with games. I never cared tbh. Like when people would rage quit or leave games because I've always played casual my entire life. Only competive with irl sports. Games to me have just always seemed, well, like games.

Sorry sorta rambling. I just dont get how and why Phils still going.

One could argue hes stuck. There are over 11 million job openings in the United States right now though. There's no excuse. He could seek a job of sorts. Places are in fact hard up enough to hire even Dave here.

Idk if I'm MATI or just sperging over how he's such a loser at 39/40.

I'm not looking forward to the wave of people like Phil that's coming in the years to come thanks to all the schools being shut down and all that pandemic related stuff that's created an american version of Japan's lost generation aka Future Phils.

 

[NursezillaX]

i had phils halo online stream on while playing chrono trigger. I wanted to listen to the desperation after finding out he whined the whole stream

I cant believe he has found a way to blame metroid dread for low tips. I mean, i dont know how he has made the connection. But apparently because Dread went 2 streams longer than he anticipated, its effecting the halo streams.

Oh well.... I guess no more metroidvania

Also blaming his team mate for giving him harder matches. He wont play with members but he will play with a guy who is a long time halo player.

Phil is so desperate to look good playing this game and all online games, its like the TIHYDP compilations has given him severe PTSD/paranoia.

This is another example of how his ridiculous adherence to a preset schedule fucks him up. He begged and threatened that if his last Halo stream didn't get significantly more support he'd have to drop it. Inexplicably, his piggies actually do pay up and Dave says that the game will stay. Metroid Dread goes longer than he planned and, instead of honoring his commitment to continue to play Halo as a result of the support people gave it, the guy who has complete control of his schedule says there's 'nothing he could do'. Now he's completely mystified why there's no support after people had stepped up to ensure he continued playing it.

It's rare to see someone so completely incapable of thinking in terms of cause and effect when it comes to their own actions. He's so hardwired with the mentality that every failure or challenge in his life is the result of external forces, never a consequence of his own behavior, that logical and entirely predictable responses to his nonsense completely baffle him. The reason he can't figure these things out is because the consideration that it may be due to something that he said or did is never even a consideration. It's wild.

 

[N0thingICanDo]

39 year old man worked too hard yesterday and was SHOT after playing Halo

He deserves all your money and the Santa Hogan for the hard work folks

 

[Pandalee’s Tits]

I will always find it funny that Phil of all people had a bird that was ten years younger and a nympho, and he used her to cook and clean. Imagine your bird has to tell random people online on some random forum about not getting laid.
Mate I'm positive that even if Phil had stamina and wouldn't get exhausted just from existing he still couldn't give any girl a good dicking. I'm certain he has some form of erectile dysfunction, and has had it for a while. There is no way a bloke can be this insecure about sex, nudity and romance less he can't perform.

That and he’s gay

 

[Dennis Rodman]

View attachment 2799063
"Physically drained" from playing Halo for 6 hours

What an absolute waste of human life.

 

[Elescondido]

I will always find it funny that Phil of all people had a bird that was ten years younger and a nympho, and he used her to cook and clean. Imagine your bird has to tell random people online on some random forum about not getting laid.
Mate I'm positive that even if Phil had stamina and wouldn't get exhausted just from existing he still couldn't give any girl a good dicking. I'm certain he has some form of erectile dysfunction, and has had it for a while. There is no way a bloke can be this insecure about sex, nudity and romance less he can't perform.

Like some people had said before, he is 100% gay or maybe he doesnt like men but the clearly thinks women are gross
That being said , whats the source of pandalee talking about his sex life on a forum ? i'd like to read that , sounds funny

 

[Adebisi]

That and he’s gay

We have the gay theory but is he a top or a bottom is the real question

 

[Sparkletor 2.0]

Usually, when you buy yourself a Russian Bride, you got to have sex, it's the point of it, besides showing off. I wouldn't bet he does, I mean, the guy is literally rotting day after day, and exhausted after playing Halo for 2 x 3 hours, including a 30 minutes break...

I will always find it funny that Phil of all people had a bird that was ten years younger and a nympho, and he used her to cook and clean. Imagine your bird has to tell random people online on some random forum about not getting laid.
Mate I'm positive that even if Phil had stamina and wouldn't get exhausted just from existing he still couldn't give any girl a good dicking. I'm certain he has some form of erectile dysfunction, and has had it for a while. There is no way a bloke can be this insecure about sex, nudity and romance less he can't perform.

This dude has to sit down to take a shower. He gets tired from going up 10 stairs. He can said he can't lift more than a milk jug. I doubt he has the stamina or ability to have sex that is in any way satisfying for a woman.

Like some people had said before, he is 100% gay or maybe he doesnt like men but the clearly thinks women are gross
That being said , whats the source of pandalee talking about his sex life on a forum ? i'd like to read that , sounds funny

If I recall correctly, one example is when Panda was making a soap video and one of the scents was called "Better than Sex". She then said, "Yeah, better than sex I'm not having."

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

We have the gay theory but is he a top or a bottom is the real question

Ahahaha you think that's even a question?!?

No you don't. You're trolling.

 

[QwahlityKahntent]

because he is actually happy with the way his life is.

agree with everything you posted except this. phil isn't happy, he hates himself and his life but he's too stubborn/lazy/stupid to realize he's the problem so he'll never change

 

[Super Dilator Duel 3D]

King of Hateful Slurs got reported again

View attachment 2782081

I love how every single time Phil is reported for insulting people (even detractors) on his stream, he bitches about how “but they’re blatantly insulting me to my face, okay? *snort*”

The concept of just staying quiet and being the bigger man has never once crossed Phil’s mind, and his insistence on chastising anyone who he even remotely disagrees with despite nearly losing his only revenue stream several times because of it is some of the most retarded shit I’ve ever seen. He’s absolutely allergic to learning from his mistakes

 

[King Daddy Telomerase]

People work longer hours while making less money yet manage to have better relationships, lives and find time for their hobbies. The only reason Phil refuses to do any of that, and it might shock you, is because he is actually happy with the way his life is. He doesn't want to go out, he doesn't want to have friends and he doesn't want to have a good relationship.

Phil lives his life exactly how he wants it, the only reason he claims otherwise is to pull at heartstrings. Would he want to change it, he could do so in a heartbeat.

Phil does want friends, narcissists usually do. But, they have to be 1) weaker people who are only be subservient to him, and/or 2) people with more resources than Phil who he feels he can use. It's not that Phil ever liked John or Howard or anyone in the FGC, he saw them as useful idiots on his way to the top and once they didn't show full support, he strayed.

The difference now and say 5 years ago is Phil is so paranoid and neurotic due to his current fucked up e-begging hermit lolcow life of his own doing that he can't even begin to socialize. I can't believe Phil actually wants this, but he's making enough money to be comfortable doing it. Hence the split between the vast majority and the tiny sect of denthead loser paypigs that secretly wish they had the life Phil or Pewdiepie or some other immature online personality has... being paid handsomely to play video games and acting like a spoiled child all their lives.

 

[Very Honest Content]

"Now please, please, drink the Kool-Aid alright ? What ? No, you don't have to know what's inside, if you ask those question to derail the sacrifice, you're an absolute complete mahron okay ? F*ck you and your mother alright ? Alright, *snort*, *lip smack*, ok, my little neggers, everyone gets stationary now..."

Flavor-aid. Based Kool-Aid man always takes the blame for this punchline formulation but that fine product cost way too much for a cheap huckster like Jones.

Good. He doesn't deserve to enjoy that amazing fucking band. Not even superficially.

Plus, he couldn't even have named anything as easy as "Heart of Glass" without looking it up if challenged to name just one of their songs.

Get fucked, DSRee. Blondie making you cry only makes me love them even more. Shitheel.

Spoiler: With apologies to queen detractor, Debbie Harry, I call it "Pull Me"

Colour me your wine, baby
Colour me your star
Colour me your gin, darling
Kat knows who you are
Match three off your colour chart
We know where you're pullin' from
Pull me (pull me) on the ap
Pull me, pull me any, anytime
Pull me (pull me) my card
You can pull me any week or month
Pull me

Cover me with tips, baby
Cover me with funds
Roll them off of pull rate sheets
I'll never spend enough
Emotions dulled, must be the gin
Cover up Phil's alibi

Pull me (pull me) on the ap
Pull me, pull me any, anytime
Pull me (Pull me) oh my Hulk
When you're ready you can drop the leg
Pull me

Snort-hack-hiss-ack-ack, he speaks the languages of wheelchairs
Snort-hack-hiss-ack-ack, Hemsley, Rock, Bruno
Snort-hack-hiss-ack-ack, Martel, Goulet, Rougeau
Anytime, anyplace, anywhere, any way
Anyone, any rare, any gold, all day-ay

Pull me (pull me) my Hulk
Pull me, pull me any, any break
Pull me (pull me) for my tips
Pull me, pull me for some Scopley bottom line
Pull me (pull me) my Hulk
Pull me, pull me in a bejeweled clone
Pull me (pull me), pull me for your Kat's Jim's alibi
Pull me (pull me) on your phone
Pull me, pull me any, card
Pull me (pull me)
Oh, pull me, ack-ack-ack
Pull me (pull me) my Hulk
Pull me, pull me any, card
[fade]

 

[fuckshitsnake]

I just don't understand how he is so bad at something he spends so much time on. It doesn't even make sense. Like at some point he should improve just due to repetition and pattern recognition at the very least but no, he still sucks.

Phil has a learning disability. That much is an undeniable fact. A disability caused by laziness, gin, and probably being born a denthead right off the bat.

Only literal wheelchairs can spend hundreds to thousands of hours practicing something and still not get any better at it, because they're wheelchairs.