Trashfire PPP: Pig's Passage to Portugal - Update 1/26 - Ralph got his ass kicked and murse stolen. Turns out, the citizens of Portugal are NOT big fans of the Killstream

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What actually led to Ralph's beating?

  • Official narrative, chased robber to defend his property (Manpurse, €150) and 1 VS 4 epic fight.

    Votes: 80 3.4%

  • Beaten by the pimp of an underaged prostitute.

    Votes: 755 32.0%

  • Tumbled down the steep streets like a loose boulder.

    Votes: 153 6.5%

  • Beaten by a gang of drug dealers.

    Votes: 476 20.2%

  • Uttered something stupid in front of locals.

    Votes: 850 36.0%

  • Tried to put his trotters on Warski's sister.

    Votes: 47 2.0%
  • Total voters
    2,361
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The pig has landed:
1642925854814.png
Tweet | Archive
 
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NickColeman said:
So Ralph fled to Portugal because someone made finger bang gestures outside his house and left diapers on his front door? Talk about mirroring Brianna Wu's Rooftop GamerGate snippers.
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“I’m only scuuurrd for muh boootofule fiancé May! She’s preggzers dint ya know?”

“Ok May have fun, ill be gone for a few days , if anything happens I can literally do nothing as I’ll be in a different country, I’ll try to remember to keep my phone charged”

Product Intervention said:
I hope Ralph tries to speak Spanish to someone while he's there.
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“Olá Manwell, oonooo beeerrrö pourfavor”
 
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Null said:
View attachment 2911367
https://twitter.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1485013048742096903
archive.md

Ethan Ralph on Twitter: "I’m at the airport and I made the flight. I …

archived 22 Jan 2022 22:20:18 UTC
archive.md archive.md

TL;DR for anyone reading this feature:

- Andy Warski is an old friend of Ralph from the glory days of 'Internet Bloodsports'. This song is about him.
- Andy is ethnically Portuguese and has wanted to go back to Portugal for years.
- Andy was in a chatroom with people Ralph hates.
- Ralph now hates Andy.
- Ralph is visiting Portugal to spite Andy. The logic is unclear, but it's probably along the lines of "I have enough donation money from my streams to visit Portugal any time I want, unlike Andy, who cannot afford to move there right now. This will own him."
- Portugal also has decriminalized narcotics, decriminalized prostitution, and a low age of consent.
- Dick Masterson was invited to come but injured his ankle at the last moment so Ralph is going alone.
- May, Ralph's pregnant fiance, is also not coming.
- Andy and PPP (Ralph's Canadian arch-nemesis) did a stream together which was successful and is probably stressing him out. Read more.

You're now caught up. This is probably his flight:
www.planemapper.com

TP232 Flight Tracker-Washington to Lisbon (TAP-Air Portugal TP 232)-PlaneMapper

Flight TP232 from Washington to Lisbon is operated by TAP-Air Portugal. Scheduled time of departure from Washington Dulles Intl is 18:40 EST and scheduled time of arrival in Lisboa is 06:20 WET. The duration of the flight TAP-Air Portugal TP 232 is 6 hours 40 minutes.
www.planemapper.com
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What an asshole!
 
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Birth classes are a waste of time, but it's a little weird that they aren't, idk, buying a crib and stuff.

So Null said that having kids is important and Ralph made two demon babies. Warski said that he'd like to move back to Portugal and Ralph flies to Portugal.

Is it possible for someone Ralph hates to say that they think their peak experience would be standing in traffic?
 
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Portugal may not be as affluent of a country as other European states but that doesn't mean he can just walk in there and start fucking underage prostitutes. Also, if the law is anything like in other EU territories, I think the age of consent being 14 is only applicable in cases where the partner is closer in age (let's say, 18 to 20, for example) and there aren't any obvious signs of coercion or grooming. The law is made like that so that a 17 year old with a 15 year old girlfriend doesn't go to jail for having sex when they're both one year older. I'm pretty sure it doesn't allow middle aged gunted tourists to go hunting for underage pussy.
 
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Grog said:
Portugal may not be as affluent of a country as other European states but that doesn't mean he can just walk in there and start fucking underage prostitutes. Also, if the law is anything like in other EU territories, I think the age of consent being 14 is only applicable in cases where the partner is closer in age (let's say, 18 to 20, for example) and there aren't any obvious signs of coercion or grooming. The law is made like that so that a 17 year old with a 15 year old girlfriend doesn't go to jail for having sex when they're both one year older. I'm pretty sure it doesn't allow middle aged gunted tourists to go hunting for underage pussy.
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You are wrong. It means all the ages. That near age stuff is legal almost everywhere
 
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Fannyscum said:
What advice does the US State Dept have for Americans wanting to travel to Portugal?
View attachment 2912276
Link | Archive

How about the CDC?
View attachment 2912278
Link | Archive

Enjoy your coof piggy.
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Can't wait for Ralph to get the coof. I don't think he's vaccinated at all, and mandated daily tests aren't going to do shit for covid.

Id hate to be the poor schmuck who sat next to Ralph on that flight; fat fuck probably didnt even mask up.

Wonder what he put on his visa. It'd be hilarious if he gets detained for lying he's here in Portugal for business, not leisure.
 
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Grog said:
Portugal may not be as affluent of a country as other European states but that doesn't mean he can just walk in there and start fucking underage prostitutes. Also, if the law is anything like in other EU territories, I think the age of consent being 14 is only applicable in cases where the partner is closer in age (let's say, 18 to 20, for example) and there aren't any obvious signs of coercion or grooming. The law is made like that so that a 17 year old with a 15 year old girlfriend doesn't go to jail for having sex when they're both one year older. I'm pretty sure it doesn't allow middle aged gunted tourists to go hunting for underage pussy.
Click to expand...
Portuguese law only criminalizes 14-15 if she's "inexperienced" which basically translates to if she's already a thot then she's fair game, with 16-17 being completely unrestricted.

This is actually quite common among latin counties where the nominal age of consent is like 12 or 14 but in reality is 18 due to the law pretty much giving grounds for prosecution if you're exploiting a innocent virgin, but precluding prosecution if the girl is a known slut with daddy issues that chases older guys.

For example in Baja California their state law makes this explicit with the unrestricted age of consent being 18 for chaste girls and 15 for unchaste girls.
 
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