Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Quixotic Man]

Note: You're supposed to fucking temper the eggs in eggnog last I checked. So he just drank a holiday themed Amber Moon, aka an Egg Shot.

But yeah, he's an alkie. He once got so drunk he slammed face first into a stop sign and cried buttery tears over losing his hamburger over the amount of injury he did while blindingly drunk.Note he was embarrassed about losing food, not for being so drunk he slammed into an inanimate and brightly colored object.

I've never heard of tempering eggs for eggnog. Though I suppose that would give you a thicker, more custard like consistency. The way I have always done it is to beat the egg whites until they start to form peaks, then fold that in to the yolks and other already combined ingredients.

Of course thats ignoring how bad Jack was at that recipe. Those eggs aren't even fully mixed, let alone frothy. Also boozey eggnog is good. I once accidentally added too much bourbon to mine and my family liked it more than when I make it properly.

 

[RL Steinbeck]

Jack went Sandra Lee with this classic video. Making eggnog is pretty simple and you just put in a bit of booze if youd like (you can use a 5-1 ratio eggnog to brandy if you like. Also this idiot has no ideas pasturized eggs exist and can be used but would it be that big of a pain in the ass to temper your dairy and egg mixture? Almost every recipe calls for slightly heating up your mix but Jack decides to go equal parts dairy, raw eggs and alcohol and figures its fine. ty

Its been speculated that Jack has had issues with alcohol in the past since. He has seemed buzzed in a few early videos and his story of him walking full speed into a stop sign can give you an idea of how drunk he was to do that. Im sure once they made the move to where they are now and ramped up the faux christian attitude Jack traded one vice for another and doubled down on his food intake. He tends to buy alcohol in large quantities for recipes despite the recipe calling for a small amount and him saying he does not drink (like buying a fifth for a dessert or a 6 pack for chili). Hes always been an unhealthy lazy fuck but post move is where he started collection medical issues and not giving an inkling of a shit. Id imagine a drunk Jack now would be the a fucking horrible experience.

POV: Drunk Jack corners you at the eggnog bowl

(edit: formatting)

 

[the khat quaffer]

You guys are acting like he was the world's worst drunk, like he was Boris Yeltsin or something.

Jack was very moderate with his hourly intake of mimosas, Mount Gay, and Five Husbands. And he never drank alone, for the Lord was always in the room with him, helping him wring last night's leftovers from the floor mats at the Stonewall Inn.

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

Wonder how many people he’s harassing now

 

[TheLazyMan]

Attention friends, fans and subscribers of PCTLM.

After consideration, we have decided to remove "The Boys' Club - livestream ep. 37 " video from our Channel in kind consideration for one of the video's participant's wishes.
Though we thoroughly enjoy taking the piss out of whiny ManToddlers, it is never the intention of PC&TLM to hurt anyone, especially someone we consider an old friend of our Channel.

We are not Jack. We like to think we're decent human beings.

We'll be back this Saturday at 2pm with our usual dose of Scaflani Cinematic Universe shenanigans for episode 38 of The Boys' Club.
But this naughty little video is being sent back to the attic and its bucket of Turkey Necks. Sorry, Joe.

 

[Super Hans]

Wonder how many people he’s harassing nowView attachment 2917887

Holy shit, I consider a five minute drive thru too long to bother, what the hell did Jack do for Tammy to have her take him through one that would have lasted hours?

 

[Adamska]

Attention friends, fans and subscribers of PCTLM.

After consideration, we have decided to remove "The Boys' Club - livestream ep. 37 " video from our Channel in kind consideration for one of the video's participant's wishes.
Though we thoroughly enjoy taking the piss out of whiny ManToddlers, it is never the intention of PC&TLM to hurt anyone, especially someone we consider an old friend of our Channel.

We are not Jack. We like to think we're decent human beings.

We'll be back this Saturday at 2pm with our usual dose of Scaflani Cinematic Universe shenanigans for episode 38 of The Boys' Club.
But this naughty little video is being sent back to the attic and its bucket of Turkey Necks. Sorry, Joe.

View attachment 2917930

Don't blame you on that one and kudos for doing a thing Jack never fucking did in the history of ever; listen to a request another human being asked of him.

Can you cut out and keep the Livermush reaction as a shortie or something? I'd recommend that one since your reactions were gold. It'd not be too implausible too, since I've known channels that cut stream segments and turn them into videos.

 

[the khat quaffer]

Attention friends, fans and subscribers of PCTLM.

After consideration, we have decided to remove "The Boys' Club - livestream ep. 37 " video from our Channel in kind consideration for one of the video's participant's wishes.
Though we thoroughly enjoy taking the piss out of whiny ManToddlers, it is never the intention of PC&TLM to hurt anyone, especially someone we consider an old friend of our Channel.

We are not Jack. We like to think we're decent human beings.

We'll be back this Saturday at 2pm with our usual dose of Scaflani Cinematic Universe shenanigans for episode 38 of The Boys' Club.
But this naughty little video is being sent back to the attic and its bucket of Turkey Necks. Sorry, Joe.

View attachment 2917930

And they say all kiwi farmers are heartless and cruel.

 

[The Southwest Strangla]

Holy shit, I consider a five minute drive thru too long to bother, what the hell did Jack do for Tammy to have her take him through one that would have lasted hours?

I think she doesn't fight it anymore. she gave up all hope

 

[Buck Mullet]

Wonder how many people he’s harassing nowView attachment 2917887

Jack feels so inconvenienced by a busy drive thru that they have to go inside, what a fucking fat tool. I get using a phrase like the line was "two miles long" is no big deal, but in Jack's context he stupidly equates a long (whatever that is, 6-10 cars? Not two fucking miles, strokebrain) line to a slow moving one, not thinking logically and understanding that after they park and waddle in, they might have to wait later then had they driven thru to get their meat fix given the place seemed kind of busy inside as well from the pics he took. He'd edit it out, but I'd love to see footage of someone telling him to fuck off filming them or their family, it's so fucking rude.

 

[feral cat #6385]

Attention friends, fans and subscribers of PCTLM.

After consideration, we have decided to remove "The Boys' Club - livestream ep. 37 " video from our Channel in kind consideration for one of the video's participant's wishes.
Though we thoroughly enjoy taking the piss out of whiny ManToddlers, it is never the intention of PC&TLM to hurt anyone, especially someone we consider an old friend of our Channel.

We are not Jack. We like to think we're decent human beings.

We'll be back this Saturday at 2pm with our usual dose of Scaflani Cinematic Universe shenanigans for episode 38 of The Boys' Club.
But this naughty little video is being sent back to the attic and its bucket of Turkey Necks. Sorry, Joe.

View attachment 2917930

It was one of the monkeys wasn't it? They don't have you held hostage do they?

Or Loki didn't want everyone to know about his relationship with the blanket? Don't feel bad. I'm pretty sure my cat fucks my hat. I keep finding it in weird places.

 

[the khat quaffer]

It was one of the monkeys wasn't it? They don't have you held hostage do they?

Or Loki didn't want everyone to know about his relationship with the blanket? Don't feel bad. I'm pretty sure my cat fucks my hat. I keep finding it in weird places.
View attachment 2918519

It's a hell of a lot more than Jack ever did for the victims people in his videos.

How many fucking times have members of the Scalfani clan visibly and clearly demonstrated they don't want to be filmed? Tammy has downright glared at him with eyes full of basilisk horror as he poked questions at her about what sauce she had in the salad she was stabbing. She's told him "don't film me" and he keeps fucking doing it then uploads it all anyways. Junior can barely utter anything more than monosyllabic answers to Jack's questions. Bri was basically close to tears trying to eat her first In-N-Out burger while Jack asked her if it was better than...whatever the fuck, Chik-fil-A?

It's food Jack...get-togethers at a sit-down or even a cheap fast food lobby are supposed to be warm, comfortable experiences. It's not supposed to be a pop quiz that's gonna be uploaded to the internet for everyone to see and mock.

Also that picture you posted looks like the fucking george costanza hat made out of rat hairs. `

 

[feral cat #6385]

It's a hell of a lot more than Jack ever did for the victims people in his videos.

How many fucking times have members of the Scalfani clan visibly and clearly demonstrated they don't want to be filmed? Tammy has downright glared at him with eyes full of basilisk horror as he poked questions at her about what sauce she had in the salad she was stabbing. She's told him "don't film me" and he keeps fucking doing it then uploads it all anyways. Junior can barely utter anything more than monosyllabic answers to Jack's questions. Bri was basically close to tears trying to eat her first In-N-Out burger while Jack asked her if it was better than...whatever the fuck, Chik-fil-A?

It's food Jack...get-togethers at a sit-down or even a cheap fast food lobby are supposed to be warm, comfortable experiences. It's not supposed to be a pop quiz that's gonna be uploaded to the internet for everyone to see and mock.

Also that picture you posted looks like the fucking george costanza hat made out of rat hairs. `

Oh no. It's soft fur. Feels simply delightful on those frigid winter days. The cat *probably* doesn't fuck it. But it does end up in weird places.

Jack is such a scumbag he deserves a son like Chandler Halderson.

 

[Dondeld Dock]

Quick question that I am not sure if it is asked already, but: do anyone know if you can order Jack's sauce from outside the US? Orders made in thebestsauces.com requires Paypal account registered in US to proceed, but yet still calculates all postal fees for the destination nation which is somewhat unclear. Any other places he sells his gunt grease or is there something else I am missing?

 

[Schmuck of Ages]

Maybe you should visualize not quitting your nepotism gig?

 

[Adamska]

Maybe you should visualize not quitting your nepotism gig?

He ditched HVAC work and threatened to quit 7/11 since he thinks he's entitled to shit without work due to retards telling him that Jesus, famous for saying 'rich people fuck off money doesn't come with you' and 'oi asshole, money is pointless', will ensure he never fails so long as he keeps giving money to the man who violently sawed a woman's head off with no remorse or shame.

He also is low key expecting his beard to do all the work since he's a broken person whose useless sperm donor treated as a toy, and he's learned from said waste of space.

 

[GoodFattyDeadFatty]

Sounds kind of like fair use, huh Jack?

 

[captkrisma]

Maybe you should visualize not quitting your nepotism gig?

Jr should visualize buying a PowerBall ticket every paycheck. That'll be more productive than trying to manifest something literally impossible off a paycheck as an assistant manager at a gas station.

EDIT: Jr can buy a Lambo if he saves up his whole salary....for 8-10 years if he wants a Huracan supercar. If he wants an old as shit 1970's Jarama he only has to save up 5!

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

This Impossible/Beyond Meat talk is reminding me of how during the massive meat shortages of 2020, After getting my chicken ration, I'd go look at the Beyond Meat and marvel at how the stock never moved over the course of months. I live near a university, so it's not like everyone is a wendigo meat eating Jack in my area. I've seen more people buying Beyond since at my job, but it's always with a coupon and they are often buying real meat with it anyway. Very rarely do I see a true and honest vegetarian/vegan haul. People will try it. It is a novelty. I just don't know if people will keep buying it.

I will say, I've tried I think Beyond tacos once at Del Taco. Just made me want Red Beans and Rice from Popeyes, because that's exactly what it tasted like. I'll eat Boca occasionally but I don't pretend that it's real beef. If I want beef, I want beef.

As for Jack, vegetarian alternatives are thought of as a girly or gay thing, and he's not either! REAL MEN eat meat! Kinda like how REAL MEN don't watch romance movies with their wives. Gotta make sure he comes across as a REAL MAN! Fragile masculinity is just as pathetic as toxic masculinity.

It's because it's not vegans or vegetarians that are actually buying that stuff. The real hardcore ones are against the whole fake meat thing because they feel this normalizes eating meat. The people that wind up eating Beyond Meat or it's alternatives really fall into three categories.

1. People trying it to see what it tastes like. Most don't go back because why would they?
2. People looking for "healthier" alternatives or have been told they need to cut back on the fat and cholesterol in their diet and this is a good compromise.
3. Vegans and vegetarians who are going to a cookout and want to participate in it and possibly show others how these meatless products taste.

There really is no fourth category. All these fake meats are niche products that until they have similar taste, texture and price points to the real stuff aren't going to gain traction. I mean I've tried some of these plant based fast food burgers and they all taste like cheap burgers. You know the kind you get at some sketchy place at 2am after a night of drinking where it's cheap and all you want is the fat, grease and salt but you would never eat them when you're sober? That's what they taste like. But price wise? They're just as expensive as their regular fare so... what's the point?

And if Mushbrain wasn't such a fragile little bitch he'd be touting them as a viable alternative to normal fast food because he only has two taste buds in his mouth that work.

A little fun fact is that a meal consisting of a large portion of french fries, a big gulp soda, and an impossible burger is just as vegan as a salad with roasted vegetables on the side and some croutons, so this is why obese vegans can and do exist!

Now that's the case but before that it's because people who made the switch to being vegetarians / vegans just overdid it with pasta and rice to round out their meal. I've said it before you can be vegan / vegetarian and be healthy but it needs to be done correctly. Too many people when they start half-ass it and it leads to weight gain and malnutrition.

So don't know if anyone posted this before but I think I found the video that shows why Jack is is the way he is. Basically Jack has a severe drinking problem and that's why whenever he cooks with alcohol he claims he doesn't drink. In this video he puts over 2 cups of hard liquor into the "eggnog" and doesn't bat an eye when he drinks it, he even claims to not taste any alcohol even though the recipe is, lets say 7 cups of liquid total and 2 of those being the booze. Now i am no expert but spent more than enough time at a bar to know when a drink consists of 28ish percent alcohol you are gonna taste it period.

Fucking hell that was bad. The eggs aren't anywhere near done when he just dumps the sugar and cream in. He doesn't even break up the yolks before starting to whisk. He might as well just used a spoon for all the good it did. Whisking doesn't mean just stirring. You're supposed to move that thing around back and forth, up and down and not just round and round.

And yeah. Way too much alcohol not to mention he used E&J brandy. That stuff is absolute shit.

 

[feral cat #6385]

Quick question that I am not sure if it is asked already, but: do anyone know if you can order Jack's sauce from outside the US? Orders made in thebestsauces.com requires Paypal account registered in US to proceed, but yet still calculates all postal fees for the destination nation which is somewhat unclear. Any other places he sells his gunt grease or is there something else I am missing?

I would bet no.