Orbiter Isabella Loretta Janke / Maxine Sidero / Bella / Kelly Osborn / @10anon - "The Final Troll of Christory", Animal Abuser, Discord Wannabe Cult Leader, Crusty Suicide Goblin, Estrogen Dispenser

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Wait, what? All she has to do is change it to generic name #2 and it gets buried. No one is maintaining a lolcow facial recognition database for the sole purpose of weeding out lolcows
Unless she's in a shallow grave she's so stupid she'll manage to self-dox even if you completely replaced her ugly ass face somehow.
 
i dissagree. i think he probably could pay for it if he wanted to.

Again, he's not that rich. He can afford to retire well at 65, but not if he's bankrolling his waste of space daughter so she can retire at 20. Nor will he want to soon enough.

she can probably survive on her own as well,

Doing what?
 
Again, he's not that rich. He can afford to retire well at 65, but not if he's bankrolling his waste of space daughter so she can retire at 20. Nor will he want to soon enough.



Doing what?

He's rich enough to buy a hovel somewhere, and put in a trust fund that pays for basic groceries and keeps the power on. He's not rich enough to pay for the lifestyle she's used to.
 
He's rich enough to buy a hovel somewhere, and put in a trust fund that pays for basic groceries and keeps the power on. He's not rich enough to pay for the lifestyle she's used to.
do we have an actual idea as to the real Micheal Jankes net worth?
I watch a few interviews with him and he was a founding member of several different Information security companies.
he mentioned multi billion dollar contracts, as a founding member he probably got a pretty decent piece of those pies.
i dont think he'll be on the forbes list or anything, but the dude is likely in the upper 10's of millions in my estimation.

you are right in that he wont buy his daughter a mansion, especially after this kind of monumental fuck up.
but he could definitly fund her for life if he had no other choice.
Chris chan could survive on way less with a government tugboat. Isabella could probably live a way more comfortable life.

he mentions the billion dollar contracts in this interview somewhere.
 
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Honestly, guys, I think it's much simpler than that. Our Ralph is a simple creature, and I think it boils down to him thinking and saying the opposite of us. I think he genuinely just cannot accept that the Kiwi Farms could be right about anything.
Ying and yang. guess which one of us is more girly.
 
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do we have an actual idea as to the real Micheal Jankes net worth?
I watch a few interviews with him and he was a founding member of several different Information security companies.
he mentioned multi billion dollar contracts, as a founding member he probably got a pretty decent piece of those pies.
i dont think he'll be on the forbes list or anything, but the dude is likely in the upper 10's of millions in my estimation.

you are right in that he wont buy his daughter a mansion, especially after this kind of monumental fuck up.
but he could definitly fund her for life if he had no other choice.
Chris chan could survive on way less with a government tugboat. Isabella could probably live a way more comfortable life.

he mentions the billion dollar contracts in this interview somewhere.

He has a high net worth but most of that is locked up in private startups -- i.e. it is not a liquid asset and most money coming from private investors gets funneled into the company rather than his bank account (though usually a few founder shares get sold as well).

He's rich by normie standards but he won't be actually I-don't-have-to-work rich until he gets an exit to convert a big chunk of his startup equity into other assets, or if the startups are so successful that the shares are as good as cash.

Basically he could afford to give Bella a modest non-productive life, but unless he gets a lot of liquidity he couldn't fund an upper-middle-class one for her remaining 60ish years of life.
 
He has a high net worth but most of that is locked up in private startups

This. He's "land rich cash poor".

He might be able to sleaze Bella into some zero productivity, zero responsibility bullshit job in one of his startups, but outright giving her cash that's heavily embedded with other investors' money would not look good come audit time.

Basically he could afford to give Bella a modest non-productive life,

And only then if he makes certain she never gets control of the finances.

Is Bella an only child? If so, then his last years are going to be miserable.
 
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That sounds like a hilarious plan, for fun and profit!

Phase one: make database.

Phase two: sell to employers.

Phase three: profit

Phase four: laugh at cows taking to YouTube to complain about being asked to leave interviews before they even sit down.
Hire The Corral®™ all your employment security needs.
"We take reputation as serious business."
 
This. He's "land rich cash poor".

Yeah, a lot of people don't understand this. If the startups fail, 95%+ of his net worth goes up in smoke. Like all the well-off farmers who were made homeless by the Dust Bowl.

There was a point in time not terribly long ago when I had more actual spendable money than Elon Musk. Of course I wasn't actually wealthier than Musk, but he stood on a precipice where all of his assets could be destroyed and he gambled to make it past that.

People don't understand that being wealthy on paper is different than being actually, securely wealthy. Most of the top billionaires in the world sit on paper wealth, they can't actually just go and spend a billion dollars on a whim.
 
He has a high net worth but most of that is locked up in private startups -- i.e. it is not a liquid asset and most money coming from private investors gets funneled into the company rather than his bank account (though usually a few founder shares get sold as well).
he did mention leaving a few companies to start others, dude partly founded a lot of these.
when you do that, usually your share is bought out.
i guess he could pull a Bezos or a Gates and divorce his wife so the court forces him to sell his shares. getting access to tons of cash.
 
he did mention leaving a few companies to start others, dude partly founded a lot of these.
when you do that, usually your share is bought out.
i guess he could pull a Bezos or a Gates and divorce his wife so the court forces him to sell his shares. getting access to tons of cash.

That's a careful balance though. You're limited in how much you can cash out without destroying its value in the process. Bezos is rich AF but if he tried to sell all his shares tomorrow, it would tank Amazon's price. He'd still get a lot of money and he'd still easily be in the top 100 richest people in the world, since Amazon is a solid business now, but his net worth would drop by a LOT.

With a startup however, you can't just sell your shares on the market. You have to engineer a private sale, and the founder dumping his stock can reduce the value of his company to next to nothing, unless it's in a carefully engineered buyout. Even then, most buyers will raise their eyebrows if the founder doesn't want to hold on to at least a substantial portion of their stock.

Valuation of a private startup is based on hope for the future, not actual money. You can take an extreme example like Theranos, where Elizabeth Holmes went from billionaire to barely a millionaire overnight (and those remaining assets are going to be stripped in lawsuits).
 
unless it's in a carefully engineered buyout. Even then, most buyers will raise their eyebrows if the founder doesn't want to hold on to at least a substantial portion of their stock.
on that angle, there's a few factors. i dont think Mike is the sole owner and founder. presumably, he and several other investors own the company. i doubt Mike could tell you anything complicated about cybersecurity.
the real value in startups is a buyout from a bigger company. preferably another security/cybersecurity company. another company buys all the shares and the major shareholders make it out rich.
unless you want to go public, then his net worth could shoot up massively.
 
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Most of the top billionaires in the world sit on paper wealth,

Most of them sit on top of corporations that sit on paper wealth.

they can't actually just go and spend a billion dollars on a whim.

Not without risking the SEC or their shareholders taking critical eye.


the real value in startups is a buyout from a bigger company.

That depends on the business model of the startup. If the business model is shaky, then the value is in conning venture capital into buying it. Just look at all those e-bike sharing companies and the capital that's been dumped down their ratholes - you are never going to make a profit renting a service that's the preferred media for filling local lakes and rivers. Meanwhile, if the business model is sound, then the value is in growing the company. All those bigger companies started out as startups with a solid business model.

Daddy Janke's startups don't look very solid from where I'm sitting.
 
Daddy Janke's startups don't look very solid from where I'm sitting.

There's a lot of potential growth in network security, if they can just get the right contracts. The companies are potentially worth a lot and they've had some good valuations in early investment rounds. I wouldn't say that it's impossible for them to succeed if they get the right people doing the right work.

There's still chances for good exit scenarios that could leave him with lots of actual, diversified, liquid wealth. He could have an office on Sand Hill Road someday if things work out, and could potentially buy Bella a nice house with a comfortable trust fund.

But as long as his equity has poor liquidity it could all disappear very rapidly, and he still has to live like the upper middle class along with the doctors and lawyers of the world for the time being.
 
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