The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

[Prolego]

The Tranch has completed yet another successful grift trip! Penny posted about it first: [A]
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Isn't that the same selfie that he posted last time? So with any luck, in a few months time we'll be able to put together an animated gif showing the decay of his teeth to go with the one showing Kevin's retreating hairline.

I've been thinking about how quantitatively bad their operation is for their alpacas. You can obviously see how shit it is with all the sagebrush but it's always nice to have numbers. In Colorado it seems that pastures, on average, support 0.04 AUM per acre. That seems low to me but maybe Colorado sucks for grazing, with rocky soil and a short growing season. I'm going to go with 0.1 AUM per acre.

It's lost somewhere in the preceding pages, but I found something from a local saying that the recommended stocking density for the area they live in is one head of cattle per 50 acres. The land really is that shitty.

60 lb hay per month is 0.71 tons of hay per animal per year, 71 tons overall (the land shaves off 1 ton).

Of course, when you overstock to the extent they have, it is but a rounding error. And don't forget that on top of that they are housing, feeding and providing weed for 10-12 grown adults who have no other obvious source of income (apart from Kevin's mysterious inheritance).

 

[S.C.U.D.]

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Am I being tarded or is he wearing a tactical vest or something?

Well... I guess he's gotta stay strapped in case someone goes Little Big Horn mode on him

If that's Jarrod, the answer is yes, because he's a retarded tacticool LARPer to the extreme. He's that guy you went to high school with who had a copy of Guns & Ammo (or, for the older crowd, Soldier of Fortune) in his backpack and was always pulling it out not to actually read, but to let other people know he had it.

 

[A Grey Cat]

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Am I being tarded or is he wearing a tactical vest or something?

Well... I guess he's gotta stay strapped in case someone goes Little Big Horn mode on him

Somehow little big horn was less a tragedy than the tranch.

 

[AnOminous]

I wonder how many alpacas they have now. Their photos of them have fewer and fewer every time.

I wonder if they now have a mass grave somewhere on the property as Alpacaschwitz rapidly approaches end of World War II bunker Hitler time.

 

[notafederalagent]

I'm no super tranny who fights the righteous fight against Earl, but isn't it terrible OPSEC to post exterior photos of a vulnerable minority's home?

 

[The Elusive Earl]

I'm no super tranny who fights the righteous fight against Earl, but isn't it terrible OPSEC to post exterior photos of a vulnerable minority's home?

Nah, it's totally fine, trust me

 

[Ghjkl63]

A couple more tweets, they’re back on the tranch. [A],
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Here you go, car spergs. [1], [2]
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Spoiler: pics

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sorry this is late but A FUCKING RIDGELINE???

 

[AprilRains]

sorry this is late but A FUCKING RIDGELINE???

What's the issue?

 

[Ghjkl63]

What's the issue?

the ridgeline is a cope pickup, literally just an SUV with part of the roof cut off. Don't they have an actual pickup they could use to haul all that shit or have I missed something that happened during my hiatus?

 

[The Elusive Earl]

the ridgeline is a cope pickup, literally just an SUV with part of the roof cut off. Don't they have an actual pickup they could use to haul all that shit or have I missed something that happened during my hiatus?

They do, but the f-250 is broken
I might be responsible, who knows

 

[Ghjkl63]

They do, but the f-250 is broken
I might be responsible, who knows

thank you, Earl. You're a real human bean.

 

[BoobWhiskers]

I'm no super tranny who fights the righteous fight against Earl, but isn't it terrible OPSEC to post exterior photos of a vulnerable minority's home?

I was thinking that the moment I saw it, that if anyone was feeling enterprising/was more curious about who exactly is on the receiving end of this grift, that looks like it'd be really easily identifiable via GoogleMaps if there's coverage of the rez.

Lord knows if it was anyone ELSE Tranch-related the address would have been posted by seven people already. I think the only reason it hasn't happened is because watching one of the locals looking SUPREMELY unimpressed by Phil's white savior photo-OP was funny as hell so the thread kinda digs the Oglala. Not very considerate of the Tranchers though, knowing full well that we go over all the inane shit they post.

 

[Meiwaku]

Other half of my Valentines I couldn't post during the DDOS

I plan on continuing this trend.

 

[break these cuffs]

Paul's return, or perhaps divorce, arc may be just beginning in Kindness' thread. All credit to @Oxyjen, @Rustycup, and @AssignedEva in that thread starting here. The quick takeaways are that Paul's shriveled cock cannot satisfy Kindness so she is searching for a fuck buddy. This fuck buddy is supposed to be her daytime bang friend because Paul has a job and can't be around to fuck her when she needs it and can't stay up all night to do it. And oh yeah, Paul is fucking her while she sleeps. It's worth reading all the tweets.





Her burning Paul's life to the ground with rape and abuse accusations, he didn't have to actually do it, were predicted a long time ago and it looks like it has begun even if Kindness' BPD crazy brain isn't consciously pursuing that line right now.

 

[stupid frog]

Skye has been liking a bunch of Alyssa's creepy sex tweets.

 

[Flour]

Skye has been liking a bunch of Alyssa's creepy sex tweets.

Sky should cuck Bonnie by giving Alyssa the dick she craves. This is the arc that the Tranch Extended Universe needs and deserves.

 

[one_time_user]

And the only way she knows that his dick is significantly bigger than Bonnie's is... Bonnie had to have told her. crazy

 

[Miss Misery]

That garage looks like it's still got all the crap from the last grift trip.

Also for those not yet reading the Kindness thread? She may or may not be trying to get with Sky.

 

[rusty shackleford 1]

It has to be sky. They were both rejected- sky by his own husband and kindness’s blind alter by sky. It makes sense that the prospect of hate fucking is driving all these horny posts. Kindness is definitely batshit enough to need that kind of validation. If I’m not mistaken I think the initial plan was for them to form a polycule anyway until it all blew up.

Ol’ Troon Bon is an absolute madman if he pulls this off, assumes his throne back at the tranch, and overthrows the reigning polycule. Penny can’t really say shit at that point since his name isn’t on the property.

If there’s a Jesus, it’s totally sky that kindness is thirsting over.

 

[Oxyjen]

The Tranch has completed yet another successful grift trip! Penny posted about it first: [A]
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Josie did too: [A]
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Conclusion: [A]
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So they’ve done the monthly trip to South Dakota, for whatever reason the actually need to do it (it sure as hell wasn’t worth it to deliver some knitwear).
That raises the question about the other half of the grift, the hard cash, which we’ve got some suspicion just gets recycled back to the tranch.

The January 5k has come and gone, and they noticeably stopped hammering for donations after that, but it has still slowly crept up, since it was pinned.

Definitely failing to meet the target for Feb, and there’s been no word about where that money is ostensibly going, which does kind of support the suspicion that the first one was a scam and they’re having trouble coming up with a convincing story for this month.

Certainly was confusing, Penny.

Next up, truck grifts. I am sure penny had a “fix my Ford” gofundme, for £3k and then reduced to £1.5k if memory serves, but I can’t see those on GFM now.

However, the truck is still broken in a mysterious way and requires more money, this time direct to Penny’s PayPal so that we can’t keep track of it.

And last but not least: