Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

[Spunt]

Lol, meat stream. What a buffoon. I had thought it was a bit odd that I couldn't remember LowT making the typical "worst case, I gargle lead" jokes, which would be somewhat expected and can do a little to soften up a person's psychological resistance to making the attempt. But for a dude whose entire identity was edgelord humor and who had been going hard to shit for quite awhile, it's almost weird he didn't 'joke' about it more.

My take is that he was probably too egotistical to appear vulnerable in public. The wacky, zany personal was a 24/7 ego defence operation to avoid having to grapple with anything that might dent his self-image. There was also a wall of denial of literally anything no matter how obvious. He denied Bogan was his girlfriend, he denied ever taking drugs and he claimed (a few months before his death) that he hadn't been drunk "since 1995" despite being obviously trashed every stream. Someone that obstinately dedicated to such a ludicrous kayfabe would never ask for help or ever admit they were in trouble.

 

[yourdadscumdumpster]

My take is that he was probably too egotistical to appear vulnerable in public. The wacky, zany personal was a 24/7 ego defence operation to avoid having to grapple with anything that might dent his self-image. There was also a wall of denial of literally anything no matter how obvious. He denied Bogan was his girlfriend, he denied ever taking drugs and he claimed (a few months before his death) that he hadn't been drunk "since 1995" despite being obviously trashed every stream. Someone that obstinately dedicated to such a ludicrous kayfabe would never ask for help or ever admit they were in trouble.

The never taking drugs thing was such a joke to anyone who ever saw Richard in the Saint Louis suburbs. He was once eating at Annie Gunns (Chesterfield area) two tables over from us and the dude could barely separate his words and was falling asleep repeatedly mid sentence. He was definitely on percs or some other painkillers. Our waiter said Richard never came in sober.

(I'm not shocked he was a fan of Annie Gunns. Prior to his Goldbelly obsession, that would have been the best place to get overpriced whole pies and other expensive take home meals from their market next door to the main restaurant.)

 

[George Floyd Sneed]

The never taking drugs thing was such a joke to anyone who ever saw Richard in the Saint Louis suburbs. He was once eating at Annie Gunns (Chesterfield area) two tables over from us and the dude could barely separate his words and was falling asleep repeatedly mid sentence. He was definitely on percs or some other painkillers. Our waiter said Richard never came in sober.

(I'm not shocked he was a fan of Annie Gunns. Prior to his Goldbelly obsession, that would have been the best place to get overpriced whole pies and other expensive take home meals from their market next door to the main restaurant.)

Did Lowtax travel a lot to St. Louis? He lived in the Kansas City area.

 

[yourdadscumdumpster]

Did Lowtax travel a lot to St. Louis? He lived in the Kansas City area.

I don't know other than I heard from Missouri SA members that he went to AG's semi-regularly and I didn't really believe it until we saw him there with our own eyes. My guess would be he probably drove over to stock up on the pies and other goodies at the market and ate there before/after. I would be shocked if he went there much at all once he realized he could pay twice the price for his indulgences on Goldbelly and not have to leave the house.

I get the feeling otherwise that you're right he rarely traveled outside KC as I do know he bitched about how long of a trek it was for him to Country Club Plaza in downtown KC for a friend's birthday party there at Blanc Burger before that local chain shut down. Given that is probably a half hour drive from his former place - in bad traffic - I can't see him going to Saint Louis super frequently.

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

That's what absolutely confuses me. The dude was pulling in healthy amounts of cash and could have hired people and built a goddamn business but he was too cheap, zany, vindictive, and lazy to bother. Like, you could have gone on auto-pilot and hired people to do it all for you and it would have been easy even, spend some money to make money and just show up and get your ass kissed every now and then while collecting cheques.

LowT always had a bug up his ass about bringing in outsiders. I used to think that he just didn't want anyone fucking up his digital fiefdom, but now I know the real reason is the only two things he expected out of his "employees" was to kiss his ass, and work for peanuts (or free). Although I do know he was paying radium $42k a year in 2007, and although I don't know the going rate of a PHP coder, it seems like a pretty generous salary considering radium's programming acumen.

My take is that he was probably too egotistical to appear vulnerable in public. The wacky, zany personal was a 24/7 ego defence operation to avoid having to grapple with anything that might dent his self-image. There was also a wall of denial of literally anything no matter how obvious. He denied Bogan was his girlfriend, he denied ever taking drugs and he claimed (a few months before his death) that he hadn't been drunk "since 1995" despite being obviously trashed every stream. Someone that obstinately dedicated to such a ludicrous kayfabe would never ask for help or ever admit they were in trouble.

And I think LowT was just a genuinely unhappy person. He never seemed cheerful, not even from the euphoria brought on from being drunk / high. In the 22 years I've been following SA, he was never once grateful, or happy, or positive, or thankful, at least as far as I can remember. I don't know why he was the way he was. Did he have a bad upbringing? Did he suffer some childhood trauma? Did his breakup with Integral fuck him up? Or was he just born wrong? I guess we'll never know.

The never taking drugs thing was such a joke to anyone who ever saw Richard in the Saint Louis suburbs. He was once eating at Annie Gunns (Chesterfield area) two tables over from us and the dude could barely separate his words and was falling asleep repeatedly mid sentence. He was definitely on percs or some other painkillers. Our waiter said Richard never came in sober.

(I'm not shocked he was a fan of Annie Gunns. Prior to his Goldbelly obsession, that would have been the best place to get overpriced whole pies and other expensive take home meals from their market next door to the main restaurant.)

Was he alone, or did he come in with Ashli?

Edit: Jesus, I just looked it up and that's a 3 1/2 hour drive, one way! I'm surprised he never got a DUI or killed someone.

 

[Spunt]

Edit: Jesus, I just looked it up and that's a 3 1/2 hour drive, one way! I'm surprised he never got a DUI or killed someone.

This is what I was talking about in the OP when I said that just calling him lazy doesn't tell the whole story. He could make huge effort, but only if it resulted in an immediate payoff that got him food, booze, drugs or pussy. Anything else just wasn't important to him.

 

[yourdadscumdumpster]

LowT always had a bug up his ass about bringing in outsiders. I used to think that he just didn't want anyone fucking up his digital fiefdom, but now I know the real reason is the only two things he expected out of his "employees" was to kiss his ass, and work for peanuts (or free). Although I do know he was paying radium $42k a year in 2007, and although I don't know the going rate of a PHP coder, it seems like a pretty generous salary considering radium's programming acumen.

And I think LowT was just a genuinely unhappy person. He never seemed cheerful, not even from the euphoria brought on from being drunk / high. In the 22 years I've been following SA, he was never once grateful, or happy, or positive, or thankful, at least as far as I can remember. I don't know why he was the way he was. Did he have a bad upbringing? Did he suffer some childhood trauma? Did his breakup with Integral fuck him up? Or was he just born wrong? I guess we'll never know.

Was he alone, or did he come in with Ashli?

Edit: Jesus, I just looked it up and that's a 3 1/2 hour drive, one way! I'm surprised he never got a DUI or killed someone.

I just called my ex and she corroborated my memory that he was there with a group of 5 or 6. I showed her a pic of Lady Ambien and we both agreed she was there. Given this was mid-2010s it would have been not long after they started dating/just before or just after their marriage, so still prior to him turning her into his McMansion captive. I assume the rest of the dinner group were KC/StL goons, one or more of whom I assumed may have driven him to avoid the aforementioned DUI problem. I also texted someone I knew who worked at Annie Gunn's during this era and will find out how often he actually went there.

 

[Muskcarpone]

Say what you want about Lowtax but if he hadn't used one of the few instances he actually posted on Something Awful to tell everybody who'd listen that KiwiFarms is THE place he wishes Something Awful would be, I (and I suppose many other ex-goons) would have never found the place. So, while he was horrible in every other single aspect, there is at least that.

 

[BALLZ-BROKEN]

I started posting here because Hangly banned me from The New Effort, and I don't ingest enough snickerdoodle combat powder to poast on My Posting Career.

I can't talk for the rest of the SASS diaspora.

 

[Sabrina]

LowT always had a bug up his ass about bringing in outsiders. I used to think that he just didn't want anyone fucking up his digital fiefdom, but now I know the real reason is the only two things he expected out of his "employees" was to kiss his ass, and work for peanuts (or free). Although I do know he was paying radium $42k a year in 2007, and although I don't know the going rate of a PHP coder, it seems like a pretty generous salary considering radium's programming acumen.

Lowtax would complain about radium never doing anything and not responding ever (shocking!) so that was probably his rationale for not paying or paying very little afterwards

 

[Jan Ciągwa]

How ironic that the only thing dude would put any effort in was being as big of a pain in the ass to everyone as possible.

And what is he even on about "brainwashing his kids against him"? That's some incel-tier crap.

 

[Hot Dog]

How ironic that the only thing dude would put any effort in was being as big of a pain in the ass to everyone as possible.

And what is he even on about "brainwashing his kids against him"? That's some incel-tier crap.

The brainwashing bit is a normal card for shitheads who don't like getting called out for their actions. It's normal to see with messy divorces and such. Normally the kid will pick up on the bad parent and their lack of responsibility and Rich didn't like what he saw in the mirror so he deflected and denied.

 

[Sabrina]

That's true and it's actually the kids that expose the behavior as we saw in that famous nasty text message exchange. His daughter caught him chatting up other women while married, not the wife or the ex-wife. Kids are able to recognize shitty behavior for what it is from a surprisingly young age, around 8-11 years, and they are the ones that tattle on their parents. No brainwashing necessary.

 

[AnOminous]

That's true and it's actually the kids that expose the behavior as we saw in that famous nasty text message exchange. His daughter caught him chatting up other women while married, not the wife or the ex-wife. Kids are able to recognize shitty behavior for what it is from a surprisingly young age, around 8-11 years, and they are the ones that tattle on their parents. No brainwashing necessary.

His first daughter basically called him the fuck out at an early age when he was cheating on her mom and he completely chimped.

 

[Sabrina]

That's what I'm referencing but in the timeline at that point Lowtax was married to Ashli and Lauren was calling him out for emotionally cheating on her

 

[Canned Ham]

Edit: Jesus, I just looked it up and that's a 3 1/2 hour drive, one way! I'm surprised he never got a DUI or killed someone.

Maybe he got a ride in exchange for a blowjob. He's sucked enough tranny cock, and even deep throated at the very end of his life.

 

[Hollywood Hulk Hogan]

Was the $450k after taxes or is that a lol question that he even paid taxes on it? Either way, Unisonian kiwis can help me but half a mil would probably go a long long way where Richard was living, right? Couldn't he have basically just transferred his digital fiefdom into real life and bought up a dozen rental properties and become a slumlord?

With down payments in a shitty area, you could probably buy, at most, 10 properties with that. Most mortgages require a 20% down payment and assuming ~$200k house values, that'd be about $45k per.

However, the problem is that to get a mortgage, you either need a net worth that would cover the total cost (minus debts) OR have a job that the bank expects you to be able to pay it (plus other debts) back. Since Lowtax didn't have a job, no bank would give him a mortgage. He may have been able to get 2 just based on the fact he had the cash, but that's a big maybe. He could've just paid cash for the two houses, though.

However, even with the properties, it's no guarantee you will make money from it. With even a $2k/month rent, that is $48k per year total. That's assuming you have tenants all year, too, and minus expenses and property taxes. Landlords must pay for any house maintenance and can be up shit creek if they can't find tenants. That's why people who say to invest in rental properties with everything you have and be willing to go high into debt to do it are generally retards who suck at finance. It can pan out, but also can fuck you over hard.

 

[Ruin]

Dude was 41 and looked 75 when he ate chrome.

Don't do drugs kids.

 

[deepFriedBaka]

Dude was 41 and looked 75 when he ate chrome.

Don't do drugs kids.

Yep. He died when he was 45. 45 when he shot himself, and in that last image he looked like he was 70 (or 65 at the very least).

So since he's dead, how long do you expect the bitter fight on his estate to continue?

 

[Ghostse]

That's why people who say to invest in rental properties with everything you have and be willing to go high into debt to do it are generally retards who suck at finance. It can pan out, but also can fuck you over hard.

It can fuck you over or make you financially independent in 10-20 years. The problem is that you need a lot of money to get started, and this high barrier to entry keeps the normies out, but the market is only getting tighter, especially as Cali-style "Luxury Apartments" take over the mid-range that only large Investment firms can afford to purchase.

tl;dr: The correct way to do it is buy in with other people and spread the risk with a large number of properties. Going solo, especially with a low number of properties, is a ticket to sad, sad times if one of them goes belly up or vacant on you. This is also risky because you need to make sure no one is skimming or trying to do straight up fraud.
Depending on where you buy, historically property values have outpaced inflation (or more accurately, real estate has been used to subtly absorb inflation) or even the prime rate so even if you go into eye watering debt your equity should keep you afloat, but you'll have put in a lot of time and have not much to show for it.

The other problem with the advice is that the videos always show people who have like 20 houses and 10 apartment buildings chilling on the beach because they have enough built in pricing to farm everything out to a management company. Until you're making enough to give some profit to someone else, you need to do that. That usually means working two jobs for 5 years or more - your normal one and then the one where you deal with your tenants slowly destroying your house.