Ever since he dumped me and trooned out, I've had constant nightmares and can barely sleep. It's all genuinely fucking with my head, makes me want to neck rope, fuck. I guess the troon 41% rubbed off on me instead of the actual tranny. I probably sound dramatic/autistic but I've been distressed almost non-stop. Anyone else felt something like this during a similar situation or am I just a deranged mentally unstable autist? Sorry for probable major PL, I feel like I have nowhere else to turn without being called a "transphobe".
This happened to me after a childhood friend trooned out. I was super paranoid about how far back it stretched, whether they were jealous of me as kids, how do I react, how much of everything was genuine, etc. I can only bet it's even worse when it's a former partner.
Hang in there! You'll be okay. Stick to your guns and play the waiting game. Gtfo as far away from them as possible once the dust settles and move on. Troons stem from genuinely unhappy, off people. You have an extremely high chance of dodging the bullet the next go around, now that you know the red flags.
Ever since he dumped me and trooned out, I've had constant nightmares and can barely sleep. It's all genuinely fucking with my head, makes me want to neck rope, fuck. I guess the troon 41% rubbed off on me instead of the actual tranny. I probably sound dramatic/autistic but I've been distressed almost non-stop. Anyone else felt something like this during a similar situation or am I just a deranged mentally unstable autist? Sorry for probable major PL, I feel like I have nowhere else to turn without being called a "transphobe".
Any long-term relationship ending is gonna be difficult. In your case it's an even bigger adjustment.
The person you loved, who you were intimate with, isn't who you thought he was. It's hard not to take it personally even if it has nothing to do with you.
Be kind to yourself. Seek friends you can trust, maybe a therapist if you can afford it. Start a diary, to let your feelings out. It's hard to make sense of things right now but things will settle.
Maybe a new hobby to keep your mind busy.
Your feelings are valid, don't judge yourself for being in distress, feeling betrayed... this is perfectly normal. This is hard now, but this will pass eventually.
No...it is fine...I think that I certain level of powerleveling is somewhat expected for a thread like this...and it is ridiculous in terms of the excuses that people make for troons. I would say that he needs to get help, but the problem is that the way that troonery is handled, the mental help professions are compelled to steer people deep into troonery.
Just how far down the troon abyss has he gone? Is it just crossdressing and using feminine pronouns, or has he started the hormonal treatments yet? Is surgery also likely to follow?
He was already interested in the cross-dressing shit beforehand so probably, and yeah the feminine pronouns. I have no idea if he would ever go for the hormone treatment stuff, because of his phobia of needles. He told me he wasn't going to get the cock and ball chop but I know his troon loving parent would probably love for that to happen. I think I'm more scared of him trying to copy how I look or something.. a few years back he talked about some body swap fetish, I don't even know.
This happened to me after a childhood friend trooned out. I was super paranoid about how far back it stretched, whether they were jealous of me as kids, how do I react, how much of everything was genuine, etc. I can only bet it's even worse when it's a former partner.
Hang in there! You'll be okay. Stick to your guns and play the waiting game. Gtfo as far away from them as possible once the dust settles and move on. Troons stem from genuinely unhappy, off people. You have an extremely high chance of dodging the bullet the next go around, now that you know the red flags.
Any long-term relationship ending is gonna be difficult. In your case it's an even bigger adjustment.
The person you loved, who you were intimate with, isn't who you thought he was. It's hard not to take it personally even if it has nothing to do with you.
Be kind to yourself. Seek friends you can trust, maybe a therapist if you can afford it. Start a diary, to let your feelings out. It's hard to make sense of things right now but things will settle.
Maybe a new hobby to keep your mind busy.
Your feelings are valid, don't judge yourself for being in distress, feeling betrayed... this is perfectly normal. This is hard now, but this will pass eventually.
Thank you, I couldn't put it into words before but that's exactly how it is. I've already upped my existing psychologist sessions to once a week, and I try to do stuff I enjoy but it's hard to get motivated sometimes. Thank you so much, I really appreciate the kind words.
Ever since he dumped me and trooned out, I've had constant nightmares and can barely sleep. It's all genuinely fucking with my head, makes me want to neck rope, fuck. I guess the troon 41% rubbed off on me instead of the actual tranny. I probably sound dramatic/autistic but I've been distressed almost non-stop. Anyone else felt something like this during a similar situation or am I just a deranged mentally unstable autist? Sorry for probable major PL, I feel like I have nowhere else to turn without being called a "transphobe".
There's the question of who "gets" which friends when a breakup isn't friendly, except now there's the wrinkle that he has troon armor and people have to put in all the extra effort to disclaimer themselves, so they can't be unpersoned for transphobia. It has a chilling effect on friend groups; people may feel it's easier to just step back than to reach out to you, even though you're still the same person.
It's my turn i guess. I knew it was coming sooner or latee. Can't put it anywhere else so putting it here.
My friend has announced they are non binary. My friend who presents as a super feminine hippie chick, who sports sparkly long skirts and long dreads, whose entire identity hinges around being a mother and nurturing. Who's interests are art and gardening and spiritual woo and obsessing over boys. (But she's totally bi u guize she totally slept with a woman that one time in her 20s)
I gently suggested that perhaps the issue she has identified is not that she is genderspecial and not like the other girls but that social expectations of gender are bullshit and this why so many people are rejecting them and have been doing so since the suffragettes.
I'm sat here like...I dress like a fella, i work in two male dominated fields, I hate wearing makeup and girly clothes. Im a muscle mary with a deep obsession for cars and PCs. I have been called gay all my life but I'm not. But I'm still obviously fucking female i have tits and had babies and have horrible periods and married a big smelly engine oil covered man.
Declaring myself not a woman would change absolutely zero of the ways in which I am disadvantaged socially by being female, because those things are linked to biological sex.
But it's all about those super special gender feels. I even explained to her autist to autist that all us autists are a bit genderspecial and its totally normal. Nobody wakes up thinking "wow sure do feel like a man today".
And the kicker. She's just sure her 9 y o daughter is also going to be an enby too. I mean yeah if you start the indoctrination now I dare say she will be. And I dare say I'll end up fostering her in her teens like i did when you fucked up your sons head with your obsessive chasing of toxic men.
I'm betting now she's going to get herself a true and honest girlfriend at this rate.
Ever since he dumped me and trooned out, I've had constant nightmares and can barely sleep. It's all genuinely fucking with my head, makes me want to neck rope, fuck. I guess the troon 41% rubbed off on me instead of the actual tranny. I probably sound dramatic/autistic but I've been distressed almost non-stop. Anyone else felt something like this during a similar situation or am I just a deranged mentally unstable autist? Sorry for probable major PL, I feel like I have nowhere else to turn without being called a "transphobe".
Late to the party but I understand how you feel. When I got trashed to the curb by my fuckass ex tranny, shit felt so fucking weird? I felt nervous as hell, unsure, and when I had the realization why I got dropped I had a break down and it made me feel like shit for the longest time.
I think my biggest tip really is to cut that fucker off any and all social media and DO NOT SEEK THEM OUT. I had my ex's tumblr and checked for weeks to make sure I wasn't mentioned by her whatsoever, but it honestly made my mental state WORSE and I eventually found out she was stalking ME and trying to bait me to interact with her or some shit (I didn't give in obviously). I also think she was trying to copy me? But that's a talk for another day. Thankfully I stopped checking her socials and my life has genuinely improved, but the seasonal trauma hits pretty bad in the winter-spring months (Dec-April) which takes time to get over.
The trauma I don't think it'll go anywhere, it will flare up from time to time depending how bad it was in your case, but as long as you have close friends to help get you out of the rut it'll be ok cause there's always someone to help you cause they care deeply bout you and your well being. It'll take time to heal, but everything will be ok!
I was confused on undertale then realized how often I see troons starting slapfights about the MC of Undertale or Deltarune being "genderless' or trans despite the whole reason for it not being specified to let you project your own identity onto the character you play. Just how bad has it gotten?
Inevitably posting here. Childhood friend has a son that they're claiming is MTF right now. The kid is 16. He's gay, he's just a gay kid. He's not even that feminine.
The kid's got a TikTok and posts about his parents not wanting him to be gay. Now, I'm a fag, (not slang, am a man who fucks men) most of my friends are LGB. Most of this kid's parent's friends are gay community. You'd think they wouldn't be homophobic, yet they are.
Luckily their kid is old enough to resist it and complain about it and isn't really into the kind of media that would encourage him to go along with the stuff. Childhood friend has been posting about "my daughter's gender" and all the usual trans-rights things online.
I've stayed out of it, mostly, the kid did post about coming out as gay on coming-out day and I replied to that with a congratulations and wish for their safety and happiness. I haven't replied to my friend's posts and I'm not sure I'll be remaining friends with the family going forward, not every old friend needs be kept.
I know of 5 transsexuals personally. None of them are what I would call balanced mentally stable people. Oddly, all of them had androgynous names that stayed the same before and after transition. Although one crackhead decided to change 'her' name to something ridiculous years later.
First is a guy I went to middle and high school with. He honestly seemed like one of the last people I'd expect to become transsexual. Very much a man's man in high school, a gothic heavy metal fanatic and anarchist. However, he is on the autism spectrum, asperger's I think, but seemed functional enough at the time. I catch up with him on social media years later and find out he's a she now, and I must say one of the least convincing transwomen I know (at least she's more convincing than Chris). However, this is the least of her problems. Basically he/she's never had a real job and is currently living at home with elderly mom in her 30s, both living off of social security. Complete social isolation and nonstop internet use has turned her into a complete troglodyte who can't even pretend to act socially normal anymore and is completely off the deep in, steeped in conspiracy theories. She rants on social media all day to all of 2 followers about politics and how she hates everyone.
Second is a guy I met in college, for a couple of years we were decent friends and went to many parties together. Unrelated to the transsexualism, but the last time we hung out he got thrown out of a club. His ex-gf was there and he kept trying to talk to her, the bouncer asked him to leave, seeing how she was getting uncomfortable. He refused and the bouncer dragged him outside. My boy grabbed the door handle and wouldn't let go until the bouncer threw him off so hard that the door came off the hinges. They called the police for destruction of property and I had to get him out of jail. We stopped being friends because he asked me to testify in court on his behalf but I didn't.
Anyway, a few years later on social media I find out that he is now a she. Like I said, we're not friends anymore so I don't know the details, but he definitely cleans up fairly well and looked halfway convincing. Back when I knew him, he was a red blooded male who basically would screw any female that he could, which is why his girlfriend left him.
Third I met at my old work, she had already transitioned by this point but some other coworkers told me about him back when she was a he. This is easily the most insane person on my list. She talked to the ghost of her grandma, used tarot cards and other means to talk to spirits. She's from a gypsy family and really embraced the whole Romany thing. This was a call center and she sounded completely nuts on the phone, like a caricature. She would just say these bizarre things all the time about her love life. She went for guys and basically was experiencing constant drama, stalkers, etc. I invited her to a party once with my friends and she become absolutely bonkers with a few drinks. We suspect she's on some kind of medication that doesn't mix with alcohol. I had to call one of our mutual friends to come get her because she was freaking us out and we didn't know what to do with her.
Reconnecting with her years later I find out her 'name' changed to something completely ridiculous and borderline unpronounceable. I re-friended her just to ask about it and she said it was a name she invented that reflects both her gypsy and Germanic roots combined into one name.
Fourth is another person from that same call center, this time a f2m who I first knew as a she. I am good friends with her boss at the time. He told me that she was really abusing leave of absence and just taking off constantly after her transition because she didn't feel like going into work. Really bitchy both before and after transition, really unpleasant person. I don't think I ever saw her/him smile. I refused to call her a he and just chose my words carefully, usually using their name instead of any pronoun.
Fifth is just a sad story, I'm not going to go into too much detail. Basically someone I know who's a lesbian got into a relationship with a woman who turned out to really mistreat her, possibly abusive. She decided to transition to a man, which this lesbian acquaintance of mine didn't like. They broke up over it because she wanted to be with a woman, and s/he didn't seem to respect that. She ended up committing suicide shortly after that breakup. Not blaming her death on this transsexual entirely, I don't know everything that was going on in her life, but I know her family really has a low opinion of 'him' and do blame him at at least partially.
Very much a man's man in high school, a gothic heavy metal fanatic and anarchist. However, he is on the autism spectrum, asperger's I think, but seemed functional enough at the time. I catch up with him on social media years later and find out he's a she now, and I must say one of the least convincing transwomen I know (at least she's more convincing than Chris). saw her/him smile. I refused to call her a he and just chose my words carefully, usually using their name instead of any pronoun.
Luckily their kid is old enough to resist it and complain about it and isn't really into the kind of media that would encourage him to go along with the stuff. Childhood friend has been posting about "my daughter's gender" and all the usual trans-rights things online.
Your friend sounds like they're trying to take the Iranian solution.
Growing up in the age of social media sounds hellish. Your parents telling the entire world that they intend to troon you out, and you're still having to eat at the same table with them.
Haha I think I might be run off the site immediately, but I suppose I could try.
He was already interested in the cross-dressing shit beforehand so probably, and yeah the feminine pronouns. I have no idea if he would ever go for the hormone treatment stuff, because of his phobia of needles. He told me he wasn't going to get the cock and ball chop but I know his troon loving parent would probably love for that to happen. I think I'm more scared of him trying to copy how I look or something.. a few years back he talked about some body swap fetish, I don't even know.
I'm glad I'm not the only one, thank you. I've already blocked him on most social medias. That's true, I guess that's something.
Thank you, I couldn't put it into words before but that's exactly how it is. I've already upped my existing psychologist sessions to once a week, and I try to do stuff I enjoy but it's hard to get motivated sometimes. Thank you so much, I really appreciate the kind words.
Ever since he dumped me and trooned out, I've had constant nightmares and can barely sleep. It's all genuinely fucking with my head, makes me want to neck rope, fuck. I guess the troon 41% rubbed off on me instead of the actual tranny. I probably sound dramatic/autistic but I've been distressed almost non-stop. Anyone else felt something like this during a similar situation or am I just a deranged mentally unstable autist? Sorry for probable major PL, I feel like I have nowhere else to turn without being called a "transphobe".
Think of it this way: you got out, free and clear, before mortgages or kids were involved. Really a best case scenario. You dodged a bullet on the sunk-cost fallacy that keeps a number of partners tied to their trans spouse, even as they destroy the shared finacials.
Inevitably posting here. Childhood friend has a son that they're claiming is MTF right now. The kid is 16. He's gay, he's just a gay kid. He's not even that feminine.
The kid's got a TikTok and posts about his parents not wanting him to be gay. Now, I'm a fag, (not slang, am a man who fucks men) most of my friends are LGB. Most of this kid's parent's friends are gay community. You'd think they wouldn't be homophobic, yet they are.
Luckily their kid is old enough to resist it and complain about it and isn't really into the kind of media that would encourage him to go along with the stuff. Childhood friend has been posting about "my daughter's gender" and all the usual trans-rights things online.
I've stayed out of it, mostly, the kid did post about coming out as gay on coming-out day and I replied to that with a congratulations and wish for their safety and happiness. I haven't replied to my friend's posts and I'm not sure I'll be remaining friends with the family going forward, not every old friend needs be kept.
I've got 2 friends right now grooming their kids to be enbies. The one mentioned above and another one who once said to me "my kids aren't gay, I didn't get lucky". Now the 9 year old girl is declaring herself "aromantic" and mum has chopped all her hair off for the second time.
Kiddo, we were all aromantic at 9. Boys are smelly and girls are incomprehensible and you're not supposed to fancy anyone until your hormones kick in.
Why yes they are stereotypical privileged non working leftists. And I say that as a leftist myself.
I still want wealth disturbutuon and equality of opportunities but I don't want all this....whatever the fuck this is.
And I say that as a leftist myself.
I still want wealth disturbutuon and equality of opportunities but I don't want all this....whatever the fuck this is.
So, this is not directly related to me, but I have a coworker who is in a similar situation to some of you here, in which she is loosing her friend to the obsession to become an FTM at 45. She does not know what to make of it, as her friend has never said anything like this before, so this might be some sort of midlife crisis.
My coworker is getting really creeped out over the fact that her friend will not stop talking about surgical options for a "neopenis" or an inflatable rod implant to get erections.
For all of the women in this thread, FTM surgery sounds just as mutilating and pathetic as MTF surgery...and apparently, these "neopenises" are very prone to complications such as gangrene or urinary issues. The idea that you have to press a button for the implant in your "scrotum" to pump air into your frankendick to get an erection sounds horrible.
Congratulations, FTMs, you are making sex into a perverse episode of MacGyver crossed with the Strogg from Quake.
So, this is not directly related to me, but I have a coworker who is in a similar situation to some of you here, in which she is loosing her friend to the obsession to become an FTM at 45. She does not know what to make of it, as her friend has never said anything like this before, so this might be some sort of midlife crisis.
My coworker is getting really creeped out over the fact that her friend will not stop talking about surgical options for a "neopenis" or an inflatable rod implant to get erections.
For all of the women in this thread, FTM surgery sounds just as mutilating and pathetic as MTF surgery...and apparently, these "neopenises" are very prone to complications such as gangrene or urinary issues. The idea that you have to press a button for the implant in your "scrotum" to pump air into your frankendick to get an erection sounds horrible.
Congratulations, FTMs, you are making sex into a perverse episode of MacGyver crossed with the Strogg from Quake.
I explained what the gender reassignment surgeries actually are to a normie family member of mine recently and they were horrified and actually severely nauseous for quite a while. I don't think most people really know what their "allyship" is going towards. I'm glad there's at least one place where we can collectively try to overcome the trauma of watching perfectly good humans hurt themselves in such a horrifying way. I'm tired of being told I have no right to feel the empathy I feel and that nobody sees it (yet) as the mental health and public health crisis that it is.
My first serious relationship which lasted for 4 years was with a MtF (pre-transition) who I imagine ranks pretty high on the cringe scale.
We met online, and during the LDR stage of the relationship he presented himself as being fully male - I had absolutely no idea that he wanted to transition until he moved in with me months later, at which point he finally decided to tell me. He revealed that he had intentionally kept this information secret and had done his best to come off as a "straight male" (speaking in a masculine way, making male characters when playing MMORPGs together, etc.) so that he wouldn't "scare me away." According to him, he really liked me and he was afraid that if he revealed his desire to become a woman, I would be turned off and not give him a chance.
Honestly, I was just confused as fuck at first. This was early 2014, and despite practically living on the internet, I had never heard of any of this trans shit.
He did his best to educate me: he went into great, passionate detail about what it meant to be trans and have gender dysphoria, and did his damndest to defend his need to transition when I questioned whether going to such extremes as to irreversibly mutilate one's body was really the only solution.
Even despite his fervent attempts to get me to understand what it meant to be trans, I just didn't get it. It was the most confusing, convoluted bullshit I had ever heard in my life.
I soon broke it to him that I was straight, so this wasn't going to work. He then proceeded to guilt trip me and say that "he wouldn't change on the inside, he'd still be the same person I knew and loved no matter what" and, admittedly being in a dark place mentally and not wanting to go back to being alone, I just gave up and decided to give it a chance, silently hoping he'd grow out of this bizarre "phase."
It got worse. For him, he didn't merely just have a desire to become a woman... he wanted to be a woman with gigantic bazongas - like, M-cup as a bare minimum requirement. "Though really," he would remind me nearly every other damn day, "I'd like to have tits so big they cover my entire stomach."
You see, he had a breast inflation fetish... and like most other troons, he confused fantasy with reality and got it in his head that liking something as a fetish means that it's only logical to become your fetish. Why be content to stare at pics of overly-inflated tits when you could just get them on yourself and have full and constant access to the real thing?
I tried to point this shit out so many times, but he was absolutely convinced that no, it wasn't just a fetish - he himself wanted to become what he fetishized because that's who he genuinely is on the inside.
He was seriously obsessive about the big boob shit... all of his favorite female characters were simply the ones with the biggest tits, and as a writer and artist his stories and drawings were 90% females with M-cup or larger bazongas. He had dozens of female characters, and I can count on less than 1 hand the number of those who had normal breasts. He would whine all the time about not being able to create girl characters with fetish-level tits on MMORPGs, and thus being sadly forced to play women with actual realistic breast size. This guy seriously bitched all the time about gigantic-tittied women not having enough "representation" in fiction.
He literally told me that he couldn't transition to become a woman without the M-cup tits - without unrealistically gigantic boobs, his femininity was "incomplete." Fucking insanity, and clear proof that it was all just a fetish for him. He had a fetish for breast inflation, and a fetish of being a woman, and was autistic enough to equate those fetishes with his identity.
As you might imagine, it was a shitty relationship. Once the troon & breast inflation crap came up, it became more or less the sole focus of his entire life.
We lived with his fundamentalist Christian mother for over a year at one point, and it was a fucking mess when he decided to intentionally be a dumbass and reveal his inner transness to her. I only put up with all the crazy shit for 4 years because that's just how deep in depression I was. As soon as I started pulling myself back together again, I got the fuck out. Right in time - he was starting to become manipulative, jealous, and insanely clingy - according to him, these were "attractive feminine traits" and he wished I'd be that way, too.
And the most damning part of it all, the epic conclusion... he actually did get those fetish boob implants. Before even starting HRT. And now he's a big titty model on Twitter/Patreon with over 50k followers. I think plenty of them don't even know he's trans, because he goes to great lengths to crop out his face or wear a mask since he's got a very masculine face shape, as seen in this rarer pic where he does reveal his face:
Before he got the implants, back when we were together, he swore that he'd never want to use his boobs to become a model - he had only "pure intentions" for his future body, and just wanted to be a "cool girl with big tits." But alas, the truth always reveals itself. This was his greatest fetishistic dream, after all: getting unrealistically huge breast implants and LARPing as a woman, earning free rent doing it because people are surprisingly desperate for this kind of content.
And don't worry, I'm not about to end this text wall post without providing his twitter and deviantart. Some might look down on me for sharing his links on a forum like this, but I don't give a fuck - this guy deserves to be laughed at, and I don't feel a shred of guilt considering the shit he put me through.
![LinkinParkxNaruto[AMV]](http://uploads.kiwifarms.st/data/avatars/l/61/61177.jpg?1699571951){kind=avatar}
