Orbiter Phil’s Weird Body... - Like, WTF? I’ve never seen anything like it.

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HORRENDOUS posture.
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actually said:
That picture on the left looks like the agent that tricks 18 y/o girls boys into doing weird porn shoots and threatens their "careers" if they don't do what he tells them to, which works until they find out that he's Z-list and doesn't carry enough sway to actually do it.
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Space_Dandy said:
How much actual sunlight does this troglodyte receive? His complexion has always looked sickly and unhealthy, like he's been locked in 24/7 solitary confinement for 10 years like Papillon.

I don't follow Phil super closely, just checking in once every few years hoping to hear of his ban from Twitch one of these days. So for you guys that follow him super close, does he ever actually go outside or even have the windows open?
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Besides Vitamin D supplements he thinks do the job for him no actual sunlight besides the minute it takes to leave and go to the grocery store every weak and whatever sunlight gets though the window in his ahffice if the blinds aren't even drawn on it.

Interesting thing about lack of sunlight, according to some medical site,

When we don't get enough sunlight, our bodies don't create as much serotonin or vitamin D. Low serotonin levels can make us tired and lethargic, and vitamin D deficiency is also known to cause fatigue. This can make it hard to focus or get much done, even if it's a task we want to do.

Sounds like out guy. Hey Phil, if you are reading this you might feel less tired if you go outside and take a walk in between your jahb.
Flavius Anthemius said:
He's even said when asked that the idea of picnics and eating outdoors on the beach or park absolutely terrifies him.
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I will believe this seeing as he concocted a story over refusing to learn to ride a bike because he saw a kid get beat up and his bike stolen once as a child allegedly. He even won a bike at a fair and refused to learn despite his parents encouragement because he refused to get scratched or bruised from falling off it.

Phil is insanely insecure about getting any scrape or bruise, it's amazing he has made it this far in life as he has. It actually wouldn't surprise me if he got burned real bad as a child one summer and decided the Sun was awful and it would give him cancer and make him age super fast and tire him out.
Oliveoil said:
HORRENDOUS posture.
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It's his bACK injury dood! Nothing he can do! You are literally mocking someone with a dislocated herniated triclops disc. Fuck you!
ZehnBoat said:
he's ashamed of growing bald, but he still combs his hair back showing off his growing widow's peak
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The duality of balding, it is either show the massive bald spot(s) on the top of his head or his ever receding hairline.
 
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Corpun said:
Besides Vitamin D supplements he thinks do the job for him no actual sunlight besides the minute it takes to leave and go to the grocery store every weak and whatever sunlight gets though the window in his ahffice if the blinds aren't even drawn on it.
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For the most part the UV-B rays that your skin makes Vitamin D out of do not penatrate through windows.

Also since Phil lives at approximately 48°N latitude there's only about 5 1/2 to 6 months of the year where the sun's angle is high enough in the sky for the UV-B rays to penatrate through the atmosphere in significant enough amounts.
The sun has to be higher than a 45° angle in the sky for UV-B rays to be reaching you. Basically if your shadow is longer than you are tall UV-B rays aren't reaching the ground.
He would have to make a concerted effort to go outside near solar noon with a significant portion of his off-puttingly doughy body exposed to be getting Vitamin D out of it.

I'll end my Vitamin D from the sun autism there since it's a moot point anyway as Phil will never go outside unless he absolutely has to because he refuses to take allergy medication.
I bet you Phil doesn't even open his car door until the garage door is fully shut.
 
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Prince Lotor said:
I bet you Phil doesn't even open his car door until the garage door is fully shut.
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I'm wondering where this trauma came from that he is super paranoid of anything. This fits more the psychology thread but there is something seriously rooted in that mind of his that goes well beyond the trolls will come for him dood!

There is no reason he wouldn't live in a gated community and have extreme agoraphobia to the point he thinks he will get robbed going into Walmart. Maybe he did grow up in a high crime area, although I seriously doubt it, maybe he is just your average New England 'nice guy' who is an asshole to everyone and thinks anyone slightly different from them is a criminal drug addict ready to stab them.
 
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Oliveoil said:
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His arms are thinner then a muscle atrophy victim.
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I know the reason his arms look like that, but I'll always wonder about the posing itself. I mean, it's his social anxiety, but it's such an obvious tic, I would expect him to be afraid to do it. Most who are anti-social and self-conscious, they do little things like tap their feet every so slightly or maybe blink a little too much. That's the kind of thing I would expect from someone who's so uptight that he won't wear his glasses on stream and hid a little scratch on his forehead after someone noticed it.

So what's with the big movements that became a meme years ago? It's so at odds with how insecure the pigroach is, on top of it being so difficult to picture him making peace with the downside of getting his anxiety out while he's interacting with people. He's defined by his inability to make compromises or sacrifices.

Very strange.
 
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