Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

Taxmom, aka Carol Kyanka, died two days ago. At least her son won't show up at the funeral in a drug haze and slurredly deliver half a funeral oration on the subject of "vindication" before passing out.

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My thoughts out to the family members.
Despite him acting like an ass.
The internet would be a different place with out him.
Atleast his fourms showed us Something Awful to laugh at
before becoming it.
 
What I always wonder is how Lowtax was able to have an energy burst enough to fly over to Utah to get some crazy pussy before going back to being a mostly bedbound addict with his spine grinding to dust. Is it just that he could manage manic bursts on copious amounts of drugs to act relatively "normal" for a time?
 
What I always wonder is how Lowtax was able to have an energy burst enough to fly over to Utah to get some crazy pussy before going back to being a mostly bedbound addict with his spine grinding to dust. Is it just that he could manage manic bursts on copious amounts of drugs to act relatively "normal" for a time?
As I said in the OP, Lowtax wasn't "lazy" in the strict sense of not wanting to do anything, unlike, say, Spoony. He instead had a very unhealthy sense of priorities, and he didn't consider anything that wasn't the immediate acquisition of food, drugs, boozy, money or pussy to be unimportant, and he didn't do things he considered unimportant or boring - things like paying his taxes, paying attention to his children, working on SA, that sort of thing. But offer him a big short-term dopamine hit within about 24 hours and he'd move heaven and earth to get it to happen. Someone upthread revealed that he'd regularly do 6-hour round trips to buy pies from some place in St. Louis. A man who is purely lazy doesn't do that, but a very blinkered, self-centred hedonist does. The man was a complete slave to his lizard brain.

Not that I disagree about him using drugs to "help" him stay "motivated" when doing these intense bursts of activity. I'm sure he was high as shit.
 
He never really had anything wrong with his back organically, he just had the "FEED ME MORE PILLS" idiopathic pain that opiate addicts' brains produce. As long as he stayed high he probably didn't notice it.

I thought the whole hospital stay thing was because the doc was saying legit "you've fucked your spine and you'll keep fucking it if you follow this road"...I suppose possible they only said it to excuse giving him the good stuff but he didn't really look healthy towards the end anyway.

In any case both Ashley and Logan reported that once they "settled down" with Lowtax after the exciting whirlwind of dating him, he basically became a bedbound drunk they rarely saw. As I recall the domestic incident MapleWife was triggered because she got shit-tired of it and demanded he make the effort to show up for dinner. Logan because her relative died and she was drunk so she thought waking up Lowtax for comfort was a grand idea until he "slipped" and "accidentally" gave her a right hook.

At least Ashley had the excuse that Richard had her passport and shit so walking would be an issue. Logan really could of just walked out the door whenever she wanted, but she needed that "woe is me" attention.
 
We'll never know for sure without seeing his medical records but in the experience of people who deal with addicts the truisms are:

1) There is no such thing as organic back pain that isn't resolved after one surgery or can't be diagnosed to a physical cause by a competent physician. If you have back pain "for no reason," doctor-shop to get a diagnosis, have multiple surgeries, etc, then what you actually have is opiate addiction. If Richard really had a problem with his spinal cartilage or whatever then it would have been fixed on the first surgery.

2) Addiction is a disease of pathologically disordered motivations. You value getting high over taking care of your family, going to work, staying out of jail, or whatever. You also get extremely motivated to see 50 doctors until you find one who, for one reason or another, will diagnose you with some nonsense and write you a prescription for oxy. There's no explanation for why someone who is so crippled from "back pain" that they can't stand up, sit in a chair, or even do a computer-based job by lying in bed with a laptop, can spend hours on end every day driving to doctors until they find one that's cooperative, other than the obvious one.

3) Addicts ALWAYS lie, and even more so the closer the topic is to their using and its consequences. I trust absolutely nothing Richard ever said about what his diagnosis was or how much medication he was using on a daily basis.
 
We'll never know for sure without seeing his medical records but in the experience of people who deal with addicts the truisms are:

1) There is no such thing as organic back pain that isn't resolved after one surgery or can't be diagnosed to a physical cause by a competent physician. If you have back pain "for no reason," doctor-shop to get a diagnosis, have multiple surgeries, etc, then what you actually have is opiate addiction. If Richard really had a problem with his spinal cartilage or whatever then it would have been fixed on the first surgery.

2) Addiction is a disease of pathologically disordered motivations. You value getting high over taking care of your family, going to work, staying out of jail, or whatever. You also get extremely motivated to see 50 doctors until you find one who, for one reason or another, will diagnose you with some nonsense and write you a prescription for oxy. There's no explanation for why someone who is so crippled from "back pain" that they can't stand up, sit in a chair, or even do a computer-based job by lying in bed with a laptop, can spend hours on end every day driving to doctors until they find one that's cooperative, other than the obvious one.

3) Addicts ALWAYS lie, and even more so the closer the topic is to their using and its consequences. I trust absolutely nothing Richard ever said about what his diagnosis was or how much medication he was using on a daily basis.
The only thing I disagree with is that it's perfectly possible to have moderate to severe back pain and it cannot be fixed with surgery.

For example, one can develop severe arthritis in their spine and the surgery options are extremely limited.

Now in a situation like this, the most important thing for the patient is to maintain a low of a weight as possible and regularly exercising, with a focus on maintaining their core strength, but careful not to cause further issues.

Pretty much all the simple shit that someone like Lowtax would never agree to or even pretend to follow through with.

Someone like Lowtax makes even the simplest surgeries difficult because he was too lazy and stupid to follow through post surgery instructions.

He could have gotten a wisdom tooth pulled and would have turned this into a chronic condition.
 
he'd regularly do 6-hour round trips to buy pies from some place in St. Louis. A man who is purely lazy doesn't do that, but a very blinkered, self-centred hedonist does. The man was a complete slave to his lizard brain.

Not that I disagree about him using drugs to "help" him stay "motivated" when doing these intense bursts of activity. I'm sure he was high as shit.
That post really surprised me because Lowtax was NO WHERE NEAR St. Louis, he was clear cross the state in the suburbs of KC. Guess he really liked those pies.
I thought the whole hospital stay thing was because the doc was saying legit "you've fucked your spine and you'll keep fucking it if you follow this road"...I suppose possible they only said it to excuse giving him the good stuff but he didn't really look healthy towards the end anyway.

In any case both Ashley and Logan reported that once they "settled down" with Lowtax after the exciting whirlwind of dating him, he basically became a bedbound drunk they rarely saw. As I recall the domestic incident MapleWife was triggered because she got shit-tired of it and demanded he make the effort to show up for dinner. Logan because her relative died and she was drunk so she thought waking up Lowtax for comfort was a grand idea until he "slipped" and "accidentally" gave her a right hook.

At least Ashley had the excuse that Richard had her passport and shit so walking would be an issue. Logan really could of just walked out the door whenever she wanted, but she needed that "woe is me" attention.
Yeah one of those big fights with Ashli was over her wanting him to watch some low-brow tv show or something. Clearly something serious enough to result in domestic violence because you can't stand to sit down and watch Law & Order for an hour with your wife.
 
Didn't Ashley claim he and his mom faked hospital pics in his basement?
 
I think he might have had this opiate addict thing where the reception of pain is so fucked up and hyper-sensitive'd that they basically have a lower pain threshold than a one year old gay baby and any ingrown nail or slight back ache you're gonna have as a middle aged computer toucher who never did anything for his health turns into insufferable agony. It's a real thing and people who take pain pills for some permanent pain management because of valid issues get weaned off to lower doses by competent doctors because there's a tendency to up the stakes with the dosage where it goes into crazily unhealthy realms and at the same time, doesn't really help anymore managing the pain.

Not saying Lowtax issues were legit, as I don't think anything was ever truly "legit" about the guy and he was such an unreliable narrator that I err on the side of "he fucking lied about it" because that's what he usually always did.

It'll never be not funny to me though that that crazy BPD woman basically killed him though, without much of an effort I might add. First sunk his battleship that was SA which then basically eventually killed him, because he couldn't stand to live in a world where he couldn't just waste away in a hedonistic void. Don't stick your dick into crazy even once, kids. (It's still usually really funny from a safe distance if somebody does, tho) It is especially satisfying because it has a karmic justice component you don't often get with most lolcows.
 
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