Craigslist Cringe Thread

disappointed that there isnt much scat requests in Melbourne

stretch and fist my smooth ass - m4m (St Kilda)
body : athletic height : 5'10" (177cm)status : single

age: 38



Looking for fisting tops to stretch and gape my smooth loose hole
I'm aussie male - 38yo 5'10 tall and fit slim 68kgs ... mostly smooth body
Very experienced at taking it ... looking for genuine catchup ... can travel to you or meet somewhere ... possibly can host - just depends
Anyone real and genuine - no BS ... get back to me and lets do it !
cheers
Hairy chub- west of Melbourne seek man action. January fun! - m4m
age: 30



As title states with some serious man boob action for you to please and tease. I will be available most days 10am-5pm all of Jan and start of Feb. Sorry cant host but can do a car meet, public toilet encounter or come to you. I'm outer western suburbs and prefer if you are too. Mainly bottom but open to most things. Must be clean. After all body types, nationalities and 25+. Hairy guys even better.
  • do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers

Yeah that's right you hear me right, I have a bag of butt plugs and female mannequins parts and a Penis Bondage Face mask.

The mannequins from a store have been disassembled and are laying all over the place, can you come and grab these ladies? We are tired of them the lazy bitches laying around doing nothing when we are all busting our arses working hard all day.

. . . and the bag of butt plugs, yes there is a bag, it's a large Safeway filled to the brim with silicone(?) butt plugs. I would not actually recommend using them for their intended purpose as they have been sitting here for I don't know how long.

They haven't been used and they are still in their plastic bags. They are an assortment of sizes and colors so if you are trying to do some crazy art piece or stick them to a friends car, or make a Halloween costume I would say get your ass down here and get these butt plugs off our hands!

They are mainly Medium size, and many Large ones. I think most of the Small butt plugs were stolen by my mates grandmother (just a guess!) . . . BUT I mean c'mon ... a free bag O' butt plugs!!!

PLEAE NOTE that the Penis Leather Bondage mask has been used for 18 months and has a slippery, slimy feel about it. It also has a slight pong that cannot be washed away. It might not have been stored properly while not is use . . .. OR, it was used on a huge fat arse BBW that didn't wash her ass hole.

Either way, caveat emptor on this Lu Lu.

Maybe you could combine the mannequins and butt plugs to give to a friend for their Christmas, and give the pongy Penis Bondage Face mask to a neighbour you don't like. Or just leave it on the backseat of your next Uber ride ... I know the Indian dude will take it and put an on ad on eBay. Don't stand between an Indian and anything for free! And all fucking Uber drivers are sick weirdos.

Anyways just come get them, we don't want our garbo men to think we are sicko kinky sex freaks.

Have a beautiful Melbz day!
  • do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers
 
whitesubslave need a black master (sweden)

Is there any black master with big cock that need a sexslave. I meen for real not as play. Can you force me to submitt to your wishes and I obey anything you want even if it will bring me much pain till I obey. I am 45 but want any age upp to 100 but need a long cock soft or hard so you can force it deep in my throut, I am ordinary straight man that want to please. I travel much so you can live anywhere maybe you come here or I come to you. Please send a photo and I send mine. Stockholm area
 
whitesubslave need a black master (sweden)

Is there any black master with big cock that need a sexslave. I meen for real not as play. Can you force me to submitt to your wishes and I obey anything you want even if it will bring me much pain till I obey. I am 45 but want any age upp to 100 but need a long cock soft or hard so you can force it deep in my throut, I am ordinary straight man that want to please. I travel much so you can live anywhere maybe you come here or I come to you. Please send a photo and I send mine. Stockholm area
I don't think he understands the meaning of "straight"..
 
or on the internet

or near any form of news

oh wait you're from NZ lol, that explains it
Back on topic.
Apply make up on me and then face fuck me. - m4m (Dunedin)
body : average height : 5'7" (170cm)status : single

age: 19



I want someone to apply make up on me and then make me their sissy bitch by forcing me to suck on their cock and even face fucking me.

A couple things though:
- I can't host
- You need to provide the make up

Very hot cougar looking for pregnancy risk sex with a younger man - w4m (Dunedin


I m a 38 year old white female 5 6 with long brown hair and eyes great bodyI am in a relationship with a great guy and am not looking for anything serious.
 
Hello

I am interested in a LTR with the DD/lg dynamic. If you don't know what that is ... you probably aren't the person for me :p. I am NOT looking for casual sex, or an open relationship / poly relationship. I am looking for ONE Daddy who wants to develop a longterm meaningful monagamous relationship with ONE special lg (me!!)

I have not had a Daddy before .. but I have been submissive in the past. I am finding though I am enjoying letting my little side out to play more and more .. I love being read to, colouring (but only with the GOOD crayons!!), and watching cartoons on occasion. I also like the idea of having a Daddy who is loving and nurturing although he might need to be strict with me sometimes .... I am a bit of a brat from time to time! I am looking to get to know someone slowly and take it from there but at the same time am not looking for endless emails / texting etc. The aim of this is to meet in person for coffee/dinner/drinks within a reasonable time frame and see if there is any connection in real life.

I am 30 years old, caucasian with blue eyes, light brown long hair, about 5 ft 4, and I am curvy/chubby/bbw figured. Please Daddy ..be intelligent ... for me the mental part is at LEAST equal to the physical. Your words and how you use them will be imperative to making me putty in your hands.
Ideally my Daddy is between age 30-40, no older than 45 please. Non smokers / no drug using, but alcohol is ok.. I drink socially myself. I live in the Durham region so I am hoping my Daddy is in Durham or Toronto area.

Please message me and tell me more about yourself. List some of your vanilla interests as well as I am looking for a full relationship and not just a sexual one.

Hope I find my perfect Daddy to love and belong to soon!
 
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Reactions: Uncanny Valley
More from my area...
It rubs the lotion.png
Rainbow.png
Friendzoned.png
J-E-L-L-O.png

I have to admit I laughed at this one
 
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Got some more from my local CL. It's as gross as it always is.

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Totally not a fetish, this is how women are SUPPOSED to act!
 
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