Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

[Blasterisk]

Sorry to flashback to this yet again but I've been thinking this over today.. He will pick on a defenseless puppy and his own son. But he hasn't fought an actual, real opponent yet.. I'm not SAYING we should send his address to an MMA fighter, but.. I'm also not saying we can't.

I'm just gonna say it: Jack, meet me at 4210 Wolfetown Road Henderson TN at a time of your choosing. I'd say bring as many friends as you want, but you'd need to have some.

Try not to end up in the morgue before you arrive.

 

[James done did it]

Jack's chewing sounds are uniquely awful, idk how he has his sound set up that it captures them almost as loudly as him speaking. I can only imagine how loud they are in person.

 

[Tiresome]

My god. I see a absolutely massive bag of diamond crystal salt. Cases and cases of likely old, expired jack sauce on the right hand side up against the wall. Bottles of tea and energy drinks on the metal shelf. An igloo cooler you could hide a body in lol.

Good eye. I imagine Rob is super happy he got to ingest heat-stored garage sauce. Also love the box full of dozens of clothes hangers, because between him and the Battleship PaTamkin I doubt they have anything small enough to fit on those things.

 

[abobe]

The silicone gasket on his stainless steel lid is covered in coffee grounds, or whatever it is, so it isn't able to get a proper seal. There are video guides online showing you how to disassemble the OXO containers to clean them. I believe they even come with a pamphlet that shows you how to do it. He could also get a replacement as his problem falls under their Limited Lifetime Warranty. But that's too much work for Jack.

 

[Fatafata v2]

That's quite a few boxes of his sauces he has in the garage. I estimate ~600 bottles

There is some branded Doug Jeffords boxes which must be where he gets the Best Seasoning from.

 

[rubytintedchix]

I wonder if poor man’s burnt ends = turkey necks?

 

[10 Sheep]

Jack's chewing sounds are uniquely awful, idk how he has his sound set up that it captures them almost as loudly as him speaking. I can only imagine how loud they are in person.

with his setup, he should become an "ASMR" mukbang streamer- perfectly fits him methinks

 

[Kosher Salt]

I wonder if poor man’s burnt ends = turkey necks?

View attachment 3222349

Jesus. Those are drowning in grease.

Burnt ends are already a "poor man's" thing anyway, they're the leftover part of a beef brisket. The middle slices up nice, and the ends get chopped up and put into beans or something. Slathering them in BBQ sauce and calling them burnt ends works great also -- they're delicious.

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Not to beat (smoke) a dead horse but Jack cooks his meats at too high a temperature for too short a duration, so the outside gets incinerated while the inside doesn't have enough time for the fat and connective tissues to soften (that's why his ribs are always "crunchy"). Compare it to for example Malcolm Reed, who usually cooks a brisket overnight + 3 - 4 hours in the morning and a rack of ribs for 7 - 8 hours, and always at a lower temperature 200-250.

Ideally when you smoke you want it as close to the temperature of boiling water. Smoking at 300 is just crazy because it doesn't allow the collagen to really break down resulting in, as you said, crunchy ribs.

My god. I see a absolutely massive bag of diamond crystal salt.

Probably for the water softener they have. If Mushbrain is correct and they have very hard water you can go through a 40 pound bag of that in a month. Although that doesn't explain why only he's getting the kidney stones and seemingly nobody else in Hendersonville. But because it's Mushbrain we know he's all about the lying.

 

[Bassomatic]

These wings make me think Jack is turning into fellow lolcow shoenice. He puts anything in his stomach, dumb as a rock, bigot, pretends to be famous and viewers all laugh at him.

Hey, it's not like jack EVER ripped anyone else off before.

 

[Dead Air]

I wonder if poor man’s burnt ends = turkey necks?

View attachment 3222349

I think technically poor man's burnt ends are usually chuck roast.

Edit: Malcom Reed again.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

I think technically poor man's burnt ends are usually chuck roast.

Edit: Malcom Reed again.

Malcolm has at least four videos on burnt ends, so I'm wondering which one Jack will rip off/fuck up.

 

[EvilDroid64]

Mushbrain has ordered a bunch more crap that he saw on TikTok. Tammy implies she's not happy with how much he got.

 

[FatJacksFatAssTongue]

Tammy implies she's not happy with how much he got.

Jagoff’s skating on thin ice.

 

[Kermit Jizz]

Mushbrain has ordered a bunch more crap that he saw on TikTok. Tammy implies she's not happy with how much he got.
View attachment 3223747

That's over $200 worth of product right there. His spending habits are starting to disgust me more than his cooking.

 

[EvilDroid64]

View attachment 3223838
That's over $200 worth of product right there. His spending habits are starting to disgust me more than his cooking.

The also have a KETOOOOOO variety pack that he did not purchase.

https://kosmosq.com/collections/barbecue-rubs/products/paleo-keto-clean-eating-seasonings-variety-pack

 

[Pig Cups]

That clip is from the Bonfire Grill video, which I believe was his first JotG after the most recent stroke. I don't understand why he even bothered to film this, he was in a really bad state. He couldn't even spell the name of his own city correctly.

the first couple fat on the go videos fatty did after his stroke are like something out of a dark comedy. this one especially

Those videos are bleak yet golden, and always deserve the occasional repost. Here’s one of my favorites. It’s from the infamous “want some salad with your Russian dressing?” video taken 4 months after his stroke. 4:55 minutes in.

“I just wanna let you know, that after we’re done, we get complimentary [if you want] ice cream cones, with ice cream on it…”


Then Tammy butts in to correct him that the ice cream comes free with every meal, not exclusively the salad bar, as Jack originally said. Free ice cream/dessert btw is a pretty good indicator to avoid that restaurant like the plague. It’s desperate as fuck to have to draw rubes like Jack in with that kind of promotion, when you could be profiting instead. It’s probably the shit-tier soft serve that you encounter in college dining halls.

Evidently, this fat faggot didn’t see a need to take a break to focus on his convalescence (this is *really* clear in the Bonfire Grill JOTG). Gee, why am I not surprised?

Jagoff’s skating on thin ice.

Nah. At this point, the Tambeast is resigned to her fate. She can’t divorce him, because she would then be saddled with alimony. I have no sympathy- she fucking deserves it.

 

[Hungry Homeless Handjob]

Mushbrain has ordered a bunch more crap that he saw on TikTok. Tammy implies she's not happy with how much he got.
View attachment 3223747

To be exact it's $224.89 with free shipping to Hendersonville, but I want to pretend he added the $130.28 UPS Next Day option because mommy mommy mommy I need sauce now.

 

[GoodFattyDeadFatty]

It’s interesting that out of all the things you could hoard one of the things he chooses is seasoning bottles. I guess he’s on a quest for something he can taste? Your tastebuds are gone forever, Jack,

 

[Aaway]

Those videos are bleak yet golden, and always deserve the occasional repost. Here’s one of my favorites. It’s from the infamous “want some salad with your Russian dressing?” video taken 4 months after his stroke. 4:55 minutes in.

“I just wanna let you know, that after we’re done, we get complimentary [if you want] ice cream cones, with ice cream on it…”
View attachment 3223762
View attachment 3223768
Then Tammy butts in to correct him that the ice cream comes free with every meal, not exclusively the salad bar, as Jack originally said. Free ice cream/dessert btw is a pretty good indicator to avoid that restaurant like the plague. It’s desperate as fuck to have to draw rubes like Jack in with that kind of promotion, when you could be profiting instead. It’s probably the shit-tier soft serve that you encounter in college dining halls.

Evidently, this fat faggot didn’t see a need to take a break to focus on his convalescence (this is *really* clear in the Bonfire Grill JOTG). Gee, why am I not surprised?



Nah. At this point, the Tambeast is resigned to her fate. She can’t divorce him, because she would then be saddled with alimony. I have no sympathy- she fucking deserves it.

"complimentary ice cream cones.....with ice cream on them" is my all time favorite jack quote