Crossover The Battle of Jim's Driveway (2022?) - A very real event that's totally happening

[There Is Light At The End]

Gym likes anime. So beating be like one in JoJo, where two guys beating one and third joins

 

[Ol' Slag]

If Ralph legit goes to Jim's house, it will be worse than Portugal.

A bunch of austistic neet samurai will descend upon him and fuck him up.

 

[I fucking love Cocaine]

He's going to get shot by Jim and his neighbours Alex Murphy-style.

And then, he'll become RoboGunt.

 

[BibiLivesMatter]

GOD, if we get footage of Jim gunning down Ralph with Frank Sinatra “That’s Life” playing in the background, I won’t think any other lowcow could top that climatic end to their story. True Lowcow KINO shit.

 

[Natogf]

I think he's going to go and participate in the battle of Jim's driveway. But one thing I've been thinking about I how long until ralph completely snaps? How long until he rage pigs a Tops? He's got to be on the verge and I think one of his paypigs is stupid enough to arm him so he can "defend himself" felon or not.. He's isolated lost all his real friends and support network. There's no way things are good at home with the horse if he's back in Portugal. Calling it now in the next year Ralph will shoot some place up or himself.

 

[Edilg]

The maintenance of both armies is gonna go through the roof. The supply lines of Maker's Mark and Uber Eats to Jim's driveway will be thin.

 

[Emperor Julian]

A couple of things occur

-nobody knows what Jim looks like, theirs a lot of comedy potential in Jim sending someone else in his place. Like a big black dude or a midget dressed as a leprechaun or somesuch.

-if he's there for an extended period some a logs will show up to fight him.

-the gunts such a hateful piece of shit I'm a 100% if he somehow gets in front of Jim he'll deliberately cough and spit in his face since metokur is immune compromised.

 

[Nightmare Friends]

Because this worked out SO well for the troll that did it to Boogie...

It absolutely did go well for frank hassle. Boogie sperged out and faced charges, frank just laughed and then put the video out

 

[Braphamut]

I'm pretty damn sure Jim and Jade likely moved recently. Why else would Jim post the picture of his weeb dungeon that basically confirms the address dox on his thread? He's not as sharp as he was in the past, but he's nowhere near that stupid.

If so, I pity the poor folks who live in that condo now.

Moving is probably what spurred Jim into reactivating online, but this isn't critical thinking time. Everyone wants to fanfic.
_________

Bushes are parted discretely as Ralph shutters a few pictures of Jim's sumptuous bride working the field. This was his moment, all the intel had finally paid off. Ethan swallows the hard lump of excitement to compose his Tweet when suddenly he feels a strong hand rest upon his shoulder. Ralph doesn't jump, he doesn't squeal, he doesn't even question this manifestation. Despite the coarse appearance of oil stained denim coveralls his presence is calming and immediately recognized. Ethan knew before turning this was the based black farmer that saved him from the blizzard.

"Ya.. ya came ta help me?" Ethan meekly stammered.

The proud black farmer shook his kindly head, weary and wise. "Oh son. Don't you see? It's me, Jim. I was with you this entire time."

 

[Idiot Asshole]

I'm imagining Ralph showing up to Jim's place on stream, hollering and oinking as he usually does. Jade yelling racial epithets out at him and throwing shuriken blades out the window in his direction. Jim is nowhere to be seen, but is presumably calling the cops because they soon arrive at the scene. Ralph charges them and runs out of breath five steps in, but his gunt continues on its trajectory and hits the fattest one, whose gut also spills out and the two bellies wobble unnervingly against one another. Ralph is immedately tackled and handcuffed, and while he's on the ground he screams in the house's direction that you're a coward Jim, why don't you come out and fight me like a man or are you a bitch, I fucked Jade behind your back etc. The usual wigger shit. Donations are pouring in, livestream records are being broken, Twitch's servers are overheating due to the unprecedented traffic.

Then suddenly everyone stops. The cops loosen their grip on Ralph, and they help him stand up. Ralph turns to face the camera, and a few seconds pass before he opens his maw.
"Well, chat, I guess that was my best 24 hour op yet." It's Jim's voice. "Ethan Ralph was never real! I had you all fooled for years and you people never caught on!" He pulls a zip from the top of his head down to his pelvis and steps out of the rubber fat man costume. He is a small black man. He then pulls out a Camel cigar, lights it and starts reading superchats, except now the audience has increased to about two million viewers so it takes him three days to get through them all. Once he finishes the last one, a shaft of light peers through the clouds and descends on him. "Well chat, it has been a fun ten years, but I'm afraid I finally lost my fight with cancer. I couldn't kick the habit, you see!" Jade runs out of the house and they embrace as they start ascending into the sky. Eventually they disappear into the clouds, to play video games and watch anime for ever.

 

[Wyzzerd]

Jade will walk out, beat his ass, and hold him down until he squeals out that he's a soy filled bitch while jim streams from Ralph's own phone.

 

[Stoneheart]

Jade will hunt the gun with her Cathunting BB gun.

 

[Bryan Dunn]

Tfw I show up to the Driveway to battle for the true Jim Fanboy Title

 

[Laquisha Guntermensch]

This is the only canonical ending for IBS. Don't disappoint, Ralphamale!

Ralph shows up, gets tackled to the ground by Jade and then hollers for the police to ARREST HER! Jim walks out and says "I love you Son." Ralph cries and his heart can't take the wild emotion so he has a heart attack and dies toppled over on Jim's driveway. Rekeita, Jim, Warski and PPP do a memorial stream and use the proceeds to taxidermy the Gunt.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

Here's my prediction with Ralph going to Jim's Driveway, which is the same as my prediction for Ralph doing any of the outlandish things he says he'll do: he ain't gonna do shit but be fat and cry about it on the internet.

 

[MelloYello]

we are going to get a case study of the castle doctrine gunt edition aren’t we…

Yup, pretty sure Jim could put Ralph's lard-ass down for good, and walk away scot-free.

A convicted felon, revenge-pornographer, belligerent internet asshole, crossing all the statelines to harass a cancer-patient and his small asian waifu?
"Your honor, that guy needed killin'. I rest my case."

 

[Chiridion]

I really hope he actually does go up North, but there is almost 100% chance he bitches out. He couldn't take one Anglo juice-let, how is he going to be able to live with himself when PPP holds him down and truffle hunts him to an audience of 1 billion aylawgs?

 

[AncientPhosphur]

Ralph being Ralph will end up harassing and get beaten up by the first Asian lady he sees because he can’t tell Asians apart, because he’s retarded.

I’d like to see Metokur shoot and kill Ralph and turn his gunt into a souvenir. However that will ruin my enjoyment of laughing at Ralph plus I’m not sure you’ll ever be able to get the gunt smell to go away.

 

[Bryan Dunn]

Has ralph updated anyone on his Metokur driveway plans yet on air?

 

[draggs]

The US will send 50 billion dollars of cutting edge weapons to help Jim repel the gunt invasion