Trashfire 5/23/2022 Gunt Goes to Portugal 2 - The Double Pounder

[urr13 account]

The ride never ends

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His concept of self is so strange, "they'll have to kill me to stop me" as if he's Malcom X or something, as if he's challenging the system and people want to stop him for it.

In reality, he's just a fat idiot that people like to laugh at, and all that happened was some people went to laugh at him IRL and his mad cow disease kicked in resulting in him huffin and hollerin only for him to be knocked down with ease. Embarassing.

 

[The Demon]

If this is true, and he’s short of breath while stationary, it could be one or more blood clots in his lungs. If so he’ll be dead within hours.

BTW I just noticed that it looks like he has some smashed or missing teeth on the upper left of his mouth. Between that and the nose, no wonder he’s keeping that side of his face off-camera.

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could also be arteries that require some kind of quadruple bypass to fix. happened to someone i knew

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

The ride never ends

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I’m going to continue to do whatever the fuck I want out in public after I’ve confirmed the dude who beat the shit out of me is no longer in the same country as me.

 

[Meriasek]

The ride never ends

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If it happens on stream, will it be the real Killstream?

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

I’m going to continue to do whatever the fuck I want out in public after I’ve confirmed the dude who beat the shit out of me is no longer in the same country as me.

"YOU'LL HAVE TO KILL ME TO STOP ME FROM BEING A RETARD, IF I DIE OUT HERE IN THE STREETZ ROLLING AROUND THE GROUND LIKE A CHINK BABY I'LL HAVE LIVED AND MADE MY DEAD WHORE MOM PROUD, I LOVE MY KIDS SO MUCH I DON'T KNOW ONE AND AVOID THE OTHER DO YA UNDERSTAND?"

 

[Aramis]

Wish Dan would've turned this retard into a braindead vegetable.

But he already is a braindead vegetable.

 

[DumbDude42]

someone should make a betting site about ralph
will he survive madrid unmolested? will he return to portugal a third time? will he get beaten a third time? will he fall for another nigerian prince scam? will we get more raw footage of his exposed gunt flapping about in public? etc.

 

[Fools Idol]

The ride never ends

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And to think I was worried that the demon that transferred from Chris Chan to Ralph might have moved on and possessed Dan after the "fight".

 

[RockHawk]

someone should make a betting site about ralph
will he survive madrid unmolested? will he return to portugal a third time? will he get beaten a third time? will he fall for another nigerian prince scam? will we get more raw footage of his exposed gunt flapping about in public? etc.

Ronnie made certain Ralph cant do anything in life unmolested.

 

[Got Milk!]

Ralph greenlighting an international gunt hunt would actually be hilarious content, like he gives you carte blanche to rough him up a bit, like professional wrestling levels of kayfabe violence IF you can find him based off playing geoguesser with his live stream. When the gunt is succesfully hunted he flies off to another mysterious destination.

I unironically believe that he could fund a lifestyle of international travel this way, I'm not even saying that to coax him into doing something retarded, if he could do that and stay just a tiny bit humble he would make bank and it would be top content. When the gunt's hunters are closing in, users can superchat advantages and handicaps to Ralph or the hunters. $10+local price of a pint, ralph has to fight with a beer in his hand without spilling, $100 he gets a can of pepper spray with two squirts left, $25 his exact GPS location is pinged to the hunters, $5 his phone plays a loud noise to help them close in. He wouldn't even have to call it the gunt hunt, the killstream is actually a pretty good name for this concept.

Ralph ip2 arc planned. Now we just need to implement. Or you know, wait 3 weeks before he's booted off Cozy and it'll fall into place naturally

*Jawsh hears that the gunt is inbound to Madrid come Wednesday*
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Gonna be a satellite uplink tracking him from orbit, several wings of the Pentagon keeping tabs on his communications, and every mercenary not yet employed in the Ukraine war being flown out to patrol the streets of Madrid, all paid for by the A-lawg consortium to ensure we get a third chapter of the gunt-punt trilogy

So I heard some former bounty hunter from AF showed up in Portugal. It was being touted like he was there to bust heads on Ralph's behalf but I've seen nothing else since a tweet screenshot. Anyone have an update on that?

 

[Blue Miaplacidus]

So I heard some former bounty hunter from AF showed up in Portugal. It was being touted like he was there to bust heads on Ralph's behalf but I've seen nothing else since a tweet screenshot. Anyone have an update on that?

He never went and I recently saw a screenshot of a tweet or superchat of him saying "he'd love to go with ralph next time"

 

[semiurgent]

It'll be like the HWNDU Capture the Flag with Shia Laboeuf, except people are kicking the flag's teeth in.

Call it Capture the Fag.

 

[Pork Packer]

New oinking hot off the twinkie rack

https://twitter.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1531000605556228099?cxt=HHwWhoCy0Y28mr8qAAAA

 

[Honka Honka Burning Love]

But he already is a braindead vegetable.

Pigs are considered Vegetables now?

 

[Retink]

I honestly feel like the gunt wants to die but doesn't wanna do it by suicide...or at least his own hands. He wants someone else to do the dirty work, especially in a spectacle that he thinks gonna make him look cool but it won't.

Suicide by cop is always an option, though really I think it's Ralph that wants out but the Gunt is in control so all he can do is make allusions to it in hopes that someone hears the message and puts him out of his misery so that he no longer has to be piloted like a blubber mech by that front ass.

 

[DoctorJimmyRay]

I don't get it. Why didn't Ralph throw that meat apron of a gunt over his adversary? It would be like covering his opponent in a heavy, sweaty, hot blanket. Every move his foe would try to make would be smothered by this fleshy front-butt cape, holding him down securely while Ralph brings the 5-star days thunder. It was the obvious play.

 

[Pork Packer]

I don't get it. Why didn't Ralph throw that meat apron of a gunt over his adversary? It would be like covering his opponent in a heavy, sweaty, hot blanket. Every move his foe would try to make would be smothered by this fleshy front-butt cape, holding him down securely while Ralph brings the 5-star days thunder. It was the obvious play.

Ya know now that you mention it a meat apron would objectively be a good fashion choice for him as it would mostly cover up the bare gunt lobes that unironically horrify so many people

 

[FuckedOffToff]

"YOU'LL HAVE TO KILL ME TO STOP ME FROM BEING A RETARD, IF I DIE OUT HERE IN THE STREETZ ROLLING AROUND THE GROUND LIKE A CHINK BABY I'LL HAVE LIVED AND MADE MY DEAD WHORE MOM PROUD, I LOVE MY KIDS SO MUCH I DON'T KNOW ONE AND AVOID THE OTHER DO YA UNDERSTAND?"
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Strong "Of Mice and Men" parallels here.

 

[peepooman]

The ride never ends

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I thought that Gunt's apparent lack of any self-preservation instincts was actually a defensive strategy, similar to a possum playing dead. That by removing any sort of challenge or satisfaction from the fight, Gunt's hoping to dissuade the attackers by basically boring them out of the fighting mood. Turns out he just wants to die. And no, getting beaten to death while lying on your back and squealing like a stuck hog is not an outlaw's death, Ralph.

 

[Yuri Normus]

Something I just thought of. Does Ralph say "Five Star days" to tie it to like a hotel rating, or is it just a cheap shot against Metokur's 4/5 stars?