DarksydePhil / TheyCallMeDSP / Phil Burnell: General Discussion #2

[Gamergirl Cleanup Crew]

Apart from the obvious homoerotic implications, I think his squeamish behavior around female sexuality is a defense mechanism. Nobody believes Phil's lies more than Phil, and he needs to believe his own version of events to stay sane. It's why he uses words like "office", "business", and "family". He's not rolling out of bed, eating a microwave burrito, then playing Halo in his Zelda jammies, no no no, he's headed to his office to work at his business of On-Demand Video Streaming Services. I think Phil isn't getting sex and he's sulky about it.
Not that he wants sex, his constant mistaking Khet with his mother is proof of where his mind is at in regards to marital intimacy. But whenever something threatens to break his carefully constructed fantasy of being a chad matchoor adult running his own business, he tends to overreact and aggressively shut it down. If someone in his chat jokingly asked him when was the last time he got laid, he would probably freak out and snap at them. He's not in a sexless marriage dood, he just doesn't obsess about sex every second like some dumb teenager, he's a matchoor adult and besides it's private tsss *shakes head* uuuggghhh, idiots man...

 

[Pepper Jack]

Blu-rays are one of my guesses for how he manages to spend so goddamn much at Fred Meyer every week. He probably wastes a lot of food, but that alone doesn't seem like it could cover his spend, unless he flushes uneaten wagyu steaks down the toilet.

Why do these Wag-gewww steaks have so much fat? Uuuhhhhh I paid $70 a steak for fat? I can't eat all this fat, I have to throw this out. The steak has too much fat to put down the disposal so I guess I have to flush it like I do other leftover fats. YIKES.

*flush*

 

[Iron Hamster]

Credit Phil Kahllins on Twitter.
View attachment 3337915

But you wouldn't be "looking at boobs all day". You should be playing a video game that people are paying to watch.

He's seething because he missed another 'save the stream' opportunity:

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/i-make...oob-sweat-in-jars.120341/page-2#post-12041458

That is hillarious because people were asking him "hey, are you 1mm" and his immediate defense was "No. Because I can see his e-mail. I can't show you so I don't dox him." I love it when his deboonks are basically "bro trust me" as if it's impossible for him to lie. Such a weak deflection.

I feel like he's been getting more toxic lately. He bends the knee more and more to people who pay him. If a dent tells him to stop begging, he does. He has grown more reliant on dent funds. But in return he is acting more crazy and angry towards regulars. This and the boobs pfp guy for example.

But he didn't stop begging. He just didn't send a tweet that stream. Him even mentioning the chair saying something was a backdoor beg. He shouldn't have said anything at all.

 

[Penix]

Phil will have a heart attack well before he loses his whales, the man has no concept of how to take care of himself and would be too lazy to do anything about it even if he did.

 

[Tom Went To The Mayor]

Credit Phil Kahllins on Twitter.
View attachment 3337915

You can't keep running from your past, Phil.

 

[FamicomGorby]

Dave said he had an "appointment" today, which means it's one of the following options:

1. Dave's Stylist, to try and hide the ever growing bald patch you can see when he turns his head now.
2. Horse Doctor
3. Dentist
4. Mexican restaurant
5. IRS office, Uncle Sam gonna make Dave pay what he owe
6. Divorce Lawyer

 

[Nurse Ratchet]

Regarding the genuine & heartfelt Memorial Day sentiment puked out onto the Twatterz yesterday by the proud & grateful true American DSPatriot, I just wanted to add another historic gem to his treasure trove of momentarily LARPing like he gives a pissfuck about the brutal sacrifices our service men & women make every day for hundreds of years, in the name of his freedom to grown roots out of his fat, crying, entitled, megalomaniacal, perma-menstruating ass into a chair every day, whilst he slapfights a plastic thing, screams at a pane of glass, sobs persecution, & implores other adult men (loosely termed) to pay his own electricity bill every month for him, because he's just too much of a hapless eunuch to keep his lights on himself.

(Credit to @Overdrive MASK_de_SMITH)

And I've seen the obligatory "Happy D-Day throwbacks, but not his banner moment in expressing the deepest feeling of his gratitude to veterans.

I just want to make sure to remind everyone that this shit actually happened, too..

Lest we fucking forget...
(emphasis added)


ENHANCE!!!

Happy Memorial Day, Kiwis. ​

 

[TheGreatWhiteNorth]

You can't keep running from your past, Phil.

Again, didn’t he just say yesterday something about “ignoring the past”? Guess he memory-holed himself.

 

[Cyber Bowling]

I'm sorry, I know I'm always autistic as fuck about clarifying this whenever it comes up, but for some reason it just really kicks sand down my canyon (not you, you're awesome & A+ post as always.)
And I'm not kidding, see? Triggar'd AF.
But:

Spoiler: Can't help it, sorry.

The ProJared horseshit was not a grudge, it was a LARP. And it led directly to the vile & still-infamous Mye Despreshin/Debunk'd Stream.

He had no clue who PJ even was, let alone the synapses to have been able to detect & single out anyone in the sea of the entire internet soblolling at him in the wake of The Fappening.
View attachment 3338380

Until he decided to pretend that he did:
View attachment 3338381

Ergo, compulsive liar & addled retconning faggot, who then used this to exploit actual mental illness to blameshift his trashtier behavior up to that point. It was vomits, even by his standards. Probably his worst up until the Jasper UTI fuckery he pulled last summer. By my metrics. (REEEE.)

I'm sorry. I know this is but a whisper of your overarching point, but, told you. On this one, I get fuckin weird. Gloss over the link up there if you think I'm just self-deprecating. Hyperturboutism.

Carry on, please.

Clarification/corrections are always welcome, especially given the weirdly deep history of the goutsphere. I will point out that Phil isn't exactly the most honest person in the world, and he could be lying about not knowing who Pro Jared is, especially since the next post seems to imply he did know and just forgot. Though the fact it was him responding to someone else and not him making the initial post certainly lends credence to Phil honestly not knowing/remembering who he was. At the very least, it's still an example of Phil smugly lashing out at another creator.

 

[OliverKlozoff]

I wonder if deep down inside he thinks it was the porn watching that cost him Leanna. Now he thinks that if he even glances at another woman Keht is going to storm out.

I wouldn't be surprised by this. Our boy already has an alcohol and gambling addiction. Why not add porn addiction to it. It would explain why Leanna was sex starved, if Phil got the old death grip syndrome. And a nice bonding subject with Derich of course.

 

[RaidenAUndertale]

Whenever DSP talks about ignoring the past he means it in the most literal sense. A week ago? A day ago? One hour ago? It's all gone. Poof! Vanished. Memory holed forever.

"But I just tipped you 3k dollars cause you promised you would stop begging."

Doesn't matter. That was in the past and I am a changed person. I am a new machoor ahdult with new personality and new bills coming up.

 

[Balr0g]

Regarding the genuine & heartfelt Memorial Day sentiment puked out onto the Twatterz yesterday by the proud & grateful true American DSPatriot, I just wanted to add another historic gem to his treasure trove of momentarily LARPing like he gives a pissfuck about the brutal sacrifices our service men & women make every day for hundreds of years, in the name of his freedom to grown roots out of his fat, crying, entitled, megalomaniacal, perma-menstruating ass into a chair every day, whilst he slapfights a plastic thing, screams at a pane of glass, sobs persecution, & implores other adult men (loosely termed) to pay his own electricity bill every month for him, because he's just too much of a hapless eunuch to keep his lights on himself.

View attachment 3338941(Credit to @Overdrive MASK_de_SMITH)

And I've seen the obligatory "Happy D-Day throwbacks, but not his banner moment in expressing the deepest feeling of his gratitude to veterans.

I just want to make sure to remind everyone that this shit actually happened, too..

Lest we fucking forget...
(emphasis added)
View attachment 3338962

ENHANCE!!!
View attachment 3338971

Happy Memorial Day, Kiwis. ​

Also let's not forget how he titled his videos yesterday.

Couldn't capture ther full title for his preshitcast but it says "Happy Meorial Day! A great variety week incoming!" Though what variety? The onlky variety comes on saturday with fisting with the pig and Dipshit reacts

 

[QwahlityKahntent]

It would explain why Leanna was sex starved

Him being gay explains that. He just said he thinks boobs are disgusting

 

[DukeMorty]

I don't think he is gay, maybe bi, but I think he acts like this because Kat is a jealous woman. When he was with Pandalee and before her, he had no issues making sexual jokes. I know some might say he was overcompensating because he is a closeted gay but I don't think that. Subaru Man said Kat was a jealous type and would snap if he looked at any women in a sexual manner. I could remembering what Subaru Man said differently but I am pretty sure he said that about Kat.

Phil acting like this weird eunuch is because Kat probably gave him a stern talk about how she hates her "man" looking at other women or he got caught looking at porn and she reamed his ass which scared him straight to never be attracted to any women, fiction or irl. Pussy whipped Dave is what he is now, a shell of a man. Hence, I think their relationship is odd and super toxic. Kat isn't trapped with Dave, Dave is trapped with Kat.

 

[LostMy1stAccount]

Him being gay explains that. He just said he thinks boobs are disgusting

Don't mistake being a fat slob and having zero sex-drive with being gay.
His whole "oversexualized females and boobs are disgusting"-shtick is just an attempt to paint himself as a "mature adult"

 

[DownwardFowl]

I don't think he is gay, maybe bi, but I think he acts like this because Kat is a jealous woman. When he was with Pandalee and before her, he had no issues making sexual jokes. I know some might say he was overcompensating because he is a closeted gay but I don't think that. Subaru Man said Kat was a jealous type and would snap if he looked at any women in a sexual manner. I could remembering what Subaru Man said differently but I am pretty sure he said that about Kat.

Phil acting like this weird eunuch is because Kat probably gave him a stern talk about how she hates her "man" looking at other women or he got caught looking at porn and she reamed his ass which scared him straight to never be attracted to any women, fiction or irl. Pussy whipped Dave is what he is now, a shell of a man. Hence, I think their relationship is odd and super toxic. Kat isn't trapped with Dave, Dave is trapped with Kat.

I mean, your bar must be lower than the Mariana Trench if you think Phil is worth being jealous over.

Kat isn’t a scorned battle axe. More like a dull rusty prison shiv. Phil is just fat, lazy, alcoholic, etc. There’s no testosterone there.

 

[QwahlityKahntent]

I don't think he is gay, maybe bi, but I think he acts like this because Kat is a jealous woman. When he was with Pandalee and before her, he had no issues making sexual jokes. I know some might say he was overcompensating because he is a closeted gay but I don't think that. Subaru Man said Kat was a jealous type and would snap if he looked at any women in a sexual manner. I could remembering what Subaru Man said differently but I am pretty sure he said that about Kat.

Phil acting like this weird eunuch is because Kat probably gave him a stern talk about how she hates her "man" looking at other women or he got caught looking at porn and she reamed his ass which scared him straight to never be attracted to any women, fiction or irl. Pussy whipped Dave is what he is now, a shell of a man. Hence, I think their relationship is odd and super toxic. Kat isn't trapped with Dave, Dave is trapped with Kat.

Kat isn’t jealous because she doesn’t give a shit about him other than the fact that she gets to live in the snort fort rent free

 

[LieLieFyre]

Personally i think Phils a gay in denial but i shall offer another option. With Phil trying to be SJW friendly his hatred of all these icky things like nudity and dating sims might him be over acting like he always does. Then again he might just be using the SJW as a defense so he won't have to admit he asked Rambo out and got denied and then played it out as a joke and has never gotten over it.

 

[Huggler]

I wonder if deep down inside he thinks it was the porn watching that cost him Leanna. Now he thinks that if he even glances at another woman Keht is going to storm out.

He gotta save whatever libido is left (if any) to Kat

 

[Providence Backing_21]

nice bonding subject with Derich of course.

Not his weird autistic extreme masturbating son.