Containment What If?

What if Chris found out ISIS was planning to bomb the US and tried to stop them himself since nobody would believe him since they would just think he's just being his usual autistic self?
 
  • Optimistic
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If Chris starred in his own film what would the title be?
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What if Chris ran a car dealership?
For my 5000th post, I shall honor the memory of the What If subforum by answering this question as honestly as I can.
Chris has no idea how money or haggling works. He tried to sell a 1997 caddy for 7,000$. That car was worth 800 at best, if it was in good condition. The car he tried to sell probably had at least 100k miles and had a cracked engine block. He called it a "great fixer-upper." Even the most skilled Puerto Rican amateur mechanic wouldn't call a cracked engine block a "fixer-upper." That's a real problem that kills the value. Chris also can't negotiate, something a used car salesman must know how to do.
Chris's best bet would be to have a team of salesman who know what they're doing. Even then Chris would have a problem if they tried to sell a car below the original asking price. Eventually he'd have to face the facts and let the people who know what they're doing run the show. So after every deal he'd have to sign it off with a disgruntled "hmmm yeah."
Then he'd just sit in his office all day, shit himself and do nothing.
 
If Chris starred in his own film what would the title be?
Well considering he calls the comic that's clearly all about him Sonichu, I'm pretty sure he would do the same thing and call it Sonichu the movie even if Sonichu isn't mention at all.
What if Chris became Emperor Palpatine's apprentice?
 
Well considering he calls the comic that's clearly all about him Sonichu, I'm pretty sure he would do the same thing and call it Sonichu the movie even if Sonichu isn't mention at all.
What if Chris became Emperor Palpatine's apprentice?
Chris would fail Palpatine, which would piss the old bastard off enough to use Chris as an "experiment", which is a fate worse than death.

What if Chris tried his hand at becoming a bank robber?
 
For my 5000th post, I shall honor the memory of the What If subforum by answering this question as honestly as I can.
Chris has no idea how money or haggling works. He tried to sell a 1997 caddy for 7,000$. That car was worth 800 at best, if it was in good condition. The car he tried to sell probably had at least 100k miles and had a cracked engine block. He called it a "great fixer-upper."

I wouldn't be surprised if that was Barb's completely unrealistic assessment of its value, she was trying to rip someone off, and Chris just went along with it.

Remember Chris is the guy who claimed a doghouse weighed 5-10 tons. He doesn't have a great grasp on reality.
 
I wouldn't be surprised if that was Barb's completely unrealistic assessment of its value, she was trying to rip someone off, and Chris just went along with it.

Remember Chris is the guy who claimed a doghouse weighed 5-10 tons. He doesn't have a great grasp on reality.
Chris was forced into that asking price by Barb. He's not good with numbers but he can be practical on prices (as his merch business testifies to, somewhat to my amazement).
 
  • Agree
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