The Great Gunt Bounty Hunt - Ethan Ralph is on the run like a greased pig telling everyone they will never find him. Inevitably, they will. Post clues and speculation here.

[AntiSchwuletteAktion]

Of course Ralph is going to continue self-destructing if he isn't found, but he's also going to continue self-destructing if he is found. The funnier and therefore superior timeline is the one where the gunt hunt is successful. It's just a fact.

 

[Ratzinger]

how the damn dirty KarenFarms can smuggle a fragmentation grenade into his dog's asshole to kamikaze Ralph when he goes to pet it.

As if Ralph pets dogs. We have to smuggle fragmentation grenades up the asses of local black prostitutes. It's the only way to be sure.

 

[AltisticRight]

Spergs always blow their wad at the first given opportunity. Plus don't we have the no trolling plans rule? Not that I care since it's not my subforum, not my broom so yeah let's all just come up with absurd ways to find out how the damn dirty KarenFarms can smuggle a fragmentation grenade into his dog's asshole to kamikaze Ralph when he goes to pet it.

Retarded shit aside, since his move, what has happened to his pets? Are Tug, Cleo and Smoke accounted for? Is he paying someone to take care of them at the old crackshack? Did May absorb the burden of taking care of them?

Good idea, the doggo will be called Karma and when Ralph microwaves it, his pig pen blows up.

 

[CohenManischewitz]

I dunno man, even when you blew it up by stating it here outright there are a couple of reasons why this is a bad Idea. First off, it could be illegal and not worth the trouble given how Ralph will be doxxed some other way in the end. Second, Ralph doesn't really get fan mail, it's so obvious shit he sends himself to dab on the ayylogs is shit he sends himself, like the Kid Diddler hat. So, a gift made in good faith, even if you hadn't blown it away, would immediately feel off for him.

It'd be funnier if you guys got Ralph to dox himself accidentally by continuing to press him on proving he's got no AIDS. Chances are, in a fit of rage he will forget to censor his address from the negative lab results. I'm not concerned with him reading this because even if he is made aware of this possibility. Nothing triumphs his urge to respond to someone talking shit about him, that's how the world found out about the Memphis micro; he just couldn't withstand Faith's ex talking shit about him, how dared he claimed he hadn't fucked Faith? He needed to be proven wrong right then and there, fuck consequences, he is just that fucking retarded and cannot think farther than his immediate physical urges.

There are laws against stalking people. Back in the day a retired MLB player who was known for illegally corking his bat by the name of Albert Belle did some shit like this. When GPS wasn't like today with the IoT. When flip phones were a thing around the turn of the century. It didn't used to be as easy, and I would imagine the laws have tightened up since. Well Albert was jealous and he put a tracking device on the car of some lady he had romantic ties to... and he got in big trouble for doing it. I don't see this ending well for anyone attempting to fuck with Raph via the United States postal system.

https://www.espn.com/mlb/news/story?id=2334039

 

[deeman]

Because OF COURSE he moved to India...

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

Because OF COURSE he moved to India...

Don't they worship cows in India? Checks out.

 

[HarrySachz]

Bro he probably thinks of himself as Hitler hiding out in his bunker in the final days of world war Jew.

lol, hes not even Anne Frank hiding in the attic, imagine being locked with Ethan Ralph in a bunker

 

[ZeDarkKnight]

lol, hes not even Anne Frank hiding in the attic, imagine being locked with Ethan Ralph in a bunker

I'd call myself a jew and let the nazis kill us

 

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

Ralph in the Hiding From Everything Protection Program should have the Mission: Imppossible theme song but insead of "duh duh duh" it's "Gunt Gunt Gunt" for the low notes.

 

[Christorian X]

So if people can reply with what they have under any of these headings I'd like to update the OP to keep it relevant and timely as a doc people can review to be up to date in current information.

What we know:

Provable dates, times, facts. Things such when he arrived in Fl, current motivating circumstances such as his financials being overdue to be delivered to the court, photos of him in his new studio space with breakers on the wall, etc.

Information from the Pig:

Things like him saying he has to go downstairs for groceries, the changing of time zones on his phone posts, Fedex deliveries.

Regional connections:
Ralph has family who owns property in West Memphis, AR, and Tennessee. Ralph owns a bog in Louisiana, Ralph has Cozy/AF connections in Florida and Chicago. May has family in New York State and Pennsylvania. Things such as this.

Clues & Questions: Obviously in any investigation there will be things that come up that are part of the puzzle that don't make sense at the time but paint a more full picture once we realize what we are looking at. Things like May continuing to be in New York, why Ralph would change his response so quickly from telling people to come to his house and fight him to being on the run, are there other legal events we are unaware of, where is the truck, why are people saying Nick kept him out of Vegas, etc.


Anything pertaining to these categories, please tag them somehow and i'll compile and add to the OP at the end of the week.

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

So if people can reply with what they have under any of these headings I'd like to update the OP to keep it relevant and timely as a doc people can review to be up to date in current information.

What we know:

Provable dates, times, facts. Things such when he arrived in Fl, current motivating circumstances such as his financials being overdue to be delivered to the court, photos of him in his new studio space with breakers on the wall, etc.

Information from the Pig:

Things like him saying he has to go downstairs for groceries, the changing of time zones on his phone posts, Fedex deliveries.

Regional connections:
Ralph has family who owns property in West Memphis, AR, and Tennessee. Ralph owns a bog in Louisiana, Ralph has Cozy/AF connections in Florida and Chicago. May has family in New York State and Pennsylvania. Things such as this.

Clues & Questions: Obviously in any investigation there will be things that come up that are part of the puzzle that don't make sense at the time but paint a more full picture once we realize what we are looking at. Things like May continuing to be in New York, why Ralph would change his response so quickly from telling people to come to his house and fight him to being on the run, are there other legal events we are unaware of, where is the truck, why are people saying Nick kept him out of Vegas, etc.


Anything pertaining to these categories, please tag them somehow and i'll compile and add to the OP at the end of the week.

After weeks of investigation we’ve determined he’s in a place with at least 2 walls.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

After weeks of investigation we’ve determined he’s in a place with at least 2 walls.

Lol. We also know May and Rozy aren’t there.

I think half the reason Ralph has to live in fear is because he rented a place that obviously has no room for May and baby. Hell he’s probably hiding from May so she doesn’t know where to serve him papers for child support.

Gunt is probably subletting trap house basement apartment a few blocks from his old crack shack.

 

[Procrastinhater]

After weeks of investigation we’ve determined he’s in a place with at least 2 walls.

It has a ceiling so we can ascertain the existence of at least one more too.

 

[Don'tAnalizeMeBro!]

Regional connections:
Ralph has family who owns property in West Memphis, AR, and Tennessee. Ralph owns a bog in Louisiana, Ralph has Cozy/AF connections in Florida and Chicago. May has family in New York State and Pennsylvania. Things such as this.

Doesn't May's mom live in Richmond even if they aren't on the best of terms IIRC.

 

[Rodeo Roadrunner]

After weeks of investigation we’ve determined he’s in a place with at least 2 walls.

So we can't rule out a shed-like structure, such as lean-to.

 

[Kramer on the phone]

this whole thread is insane, having said that i love it and i love that it caused Ethan to become so paranoid he trapped himself in his basement. its obvious the address will leak because of how many bills he has, the money from streaming has to go somewhere.

but most likely he'll do some dumb shit that will find him out, like hold up a box he got with the address showing or something dumb like that.

 

[RollerGator]

Has anyone tried remote viewing/astral projecting in attempt to find the Gunt? Maybe we could all chip in on a fundraiser to reward anyone who provides information leading to the Gunt.

 

[Anal birth]

Has anyone tried remote viewing/astral projecting in attempt to find the Gunt?

I believe there's an inmate at the Central Virginia Regional Jail who might be of some use to you

 

[ManBearHog]

Has anyone tried remote viewing/astral projecting in attempt to find the Gunt? Maybe we could all chip in on a fundraiser to reward anyone who provides information leading to the Gunt.

AP2Gunt doesn’t work, too much fat infetterence clogging up the void - you can go near but you will not be able to report back.

 

[Got Milk!]

AP2Gunt doesn’t work, too much fat infetterence clogging up the void - you can go near but you will not be able to report back.

I'm imagining a black hole with Ralph's lower half hanging out and dangling because he plugged it up.