Artcow WogglebugLoveProductions / Cynthia Hanson / Cherie Anne Hapney - One Womanchild's Fruitless Quest to Make Her Cockroach Husbando a Household Name

[WogglebugLover]

Cynthia do you intend to do anything unrelated to Wogglebug as a creative pursuit?

Nothing anywhere near as big as him at least. Wogglebug is my life.

 

[Jeff Gerstmann]

Wogglebug is my life.

Jesus Christ that's fucking sad.

 

[Smegma Gaming]

Wogglebug is my life.

You will die alone, sad and insane. All you've ever cared about is a minor character from a children's book, and it absorbs your entire fucking life... you've burned countless bridges defending this sad obsession of yours, so many possible friends and opportunities all gone. Even your own family has caged you into your room because they think you're a fucking kook, no amount of anything will ever help you. People on this forum have spent 8 years trying to talk sense into you.

You're practically 40 and knowing your vegetative lifestyle, you haven't got many years left I can promise you. Will you ever abandon the Wogglebug? No matter how vapid your existence will become? Soon no one will be left to talk to you, no mom, no family and no KiwiFarms. You better start saving yourself before it's too late, perhaps go to writing groups or talk to people about other subjects than Wogglebug and maybe people will start to value you instead of seeing you as some egomaniac bitch.

When was last time you left the house?

 

[Bojack Horsekin]

5. Tip gets understandably pissed at this and tells him his joke was in poor taste: Wogglebug responds by more or less saying he’s wrong and that his jokes are amazing and flawless because he has a superior IQ, and that only smart people are capable of understanding and making good jokes.

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand the Wogglebug's jokes. The humour is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of atheism most of the jokes will go over a typical reader's head. There's also the Wogglebug's heterosexual outlook, which is deftly woven into his characterisation-

 

[Spastic Cologne]

So as you can see…the characters were nothing but courteous to Woggie until he started actively insulting them and deflecting when criticized.

Life imitating art again hey Cherie...

I mean as in ones that are actually meant to be alive like he is and have actual real hearts and brains and not fake ones bestowed on them by conman, or otherwise none at all.

Without using a search engine, @WogglebugLover tell the class the definition of allegory...
My God, if you were to pay someone a million bucks to purposely misinterpret/understand a book blindfolded, a book written for children, they wouldn't have missed the mark nearly as far and hard as you have! It's almost, commendable?

Which is why I took him out of Oz and put him into Genoma. And because I love him so much that I don't wish for him to be burdened by all of his bad memories of Oz I made it like he wasn't in Oz to begin with. His origins now take place in this new non-Oz fantasy land I created just for him. In Genoma science and education are considered the best things above magic, and Professor Knowitall is as big a celebrity there as the Wizard became in Oz, if not bigger. And Genoma is also in a dimension closer to our world than Oz ever was which makes it easier for him to become a hero in both worlds.

I'll have you know nobody fucking asked...

In case you didn't see my previous question addressed to you Cherie I'll ask again...
When was the last time you did anything for someone other than yourself?
Bonus points if you did it out of the goodness of your heart without expecting any sort of payment or boon.
Oh and giving out free copies of your DVDs doesn't count as that is in itself self promotion/serving.
Bet you can't think of a single instance.
I'll continue to wait...

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

I'll have you know I have read that book, and listened to an audiobook version of it because I loved Sheila Donald's performance as the Wogglebug, countless times and each time I was always confirmed in my opinions of him and everyone else. He was absolutely never rude to any of them at all. But throughout the story/journey they were nothing but not only rude but at times downright cruel to him. And it certainly was never his fault, either.

Notice Cynthia doesn’t actually rebut any of Trashtaur’s points, but instead just insists Wogglebug is an ultimate gentlemen. Holocaust deniers have better constructed arguments than this nitwit. I am genuinely curious what Cynthia “hears“ when she listens to that audiobook. I don’t think she’s full on delusional in the sense of literally perceiving events differently as they happen, to the point of hallucination, but you never know.

I mean as in ones that are actually meant to be alive like he is and have actual real hearts and brains and not fake ones bestowed on them by conman, or otherwise none at all.

I love that Cynthia managed to miss the basic fucking point of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Yes, the Wizard didn’t actually give the Tin Man and the Scarecrow a heart and a brain, because they already had the qualities they represented. The Tin Man was always tender hearted and kind, the Scarecrow always had a good hessian bag on his shoulders. How hyper-literal can you be? Also, “meant to be alive.” Man, if we ever invent human equivalent AI or genetic engineering, keep the results far away from Cynthia. Also, the Tin Man started off as a regular Munchkin dude, what the fuck is she talking about?

Which is why I took him out of Oz and put him into Genoma. And because I love him so much that I don't wish for him to be burdened by all of his bad memories of Oz I made it like he wasn't in Oz to begin with.

There’s a good SCP concept in a fictional character that forces an author to do their evil bidding.

In Genoma science and education are considered the best things above magic, and Professor Knowitall is as big a celebrity there as the Wizard became in Oz, if not bigger.

What’s wrong with magic? In most stories at least, it’s still a craft that takes study and practise and shit.

And Genoma is also in a dimension closer to our world than Oz ever was which makes it easier for him to become a hero in both worlds.

Oh yeah, Genoma is like the world outside my window. I can’t go outside without being accosted by snarky trees or tit-mermaids. And every night on the news, like clockwork, some scientist has cummed on yet another lab specimen.

Eh, Cynthia probably means Genoma is geographically closer to Earth than Oz, because all this shit is clearly very real to her.

Nothing anywhere near as big as him at least. Wogglebug is my life.

I can’t believe I’m saying this, but Wogglebug doesn’t deserve you. I’ve heard of Snapewives, but I’ve never heard of being in an abusive relationship with a fictional character.

 

[WogglebugLover]

Notice Cynthia doesn’t actually rebut any of Trashtaur’s points, but instead just insists Wogglebug is an ultimate gentlemen. Holocaust deniers have better constructed arguments than this nitwit. I am genuinely curious what Cynthia “hears“ when she listens to that audiobook. I don’t think she’s full on delusional in the sense of literally perceiving events differently as they happen, to the point of hallucination, but you never know.

I actually do rebut all of @Trashtaur 's "points" in my book "The Wogglebug's Hidden Truth Behind the History of Oz" in at least one specific chapter, which I highly recommend you guys read as it's available on Amazon at the lowest price I could make it for a 300-page book.

I love that Cynthia managed to miss the basic fucking point of The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Yes, the Wizard didn’t actually give the Tin Man and the Scarecrow a heart and a brain, because they already had the qualities they represented. The Tin Man was always tender hearted and kind, the Scarecrow always had a good hessian bag on his shoulders. How hyper-literal can you be? Also, “meant to be alive.” Man, if we ever invent human equivalent AI or genetic engineering, keep the results far away from Cynthia. Also, the Tin Man started off as a regular Munchkin dude, what the fuck is she talking about?

That is what other people have told me. But the fact is I was well aware that was meant to be the point of the first book all along. But then the fact is then why would the wizard pretend to give them those fake trinkets of a heart and brain? And especially because all it served was to make them into the most utterly arrogant and delusional bastards. I mean the Scarecrow really is never all that smart in the books as he actually often does things that most average ten-year-olds would know better than to do. And the Tin Woodman really just seems far more obsessed with seeking out ways to glorify himself in his tin body and tin castle and surrounding tin everything than he ever was for seeking out those in need. And yes, I am aware also he once was a human-being, and according to his backstory he should be dead and not alive. So therefore no one knows what it is like to be a disembodied and corrupted soul of a bastard than him. So, what I've always figured is that the wizard had practiced magic he didn't understand in a magic land on magical constructs and thus had unintentionally used some kind of bad magic to put some of his own inner demons of arrogance and self-absorption into those two.

What’s wrong with magic? In most stories at least, it’s still a craft that takes study and practise and shit.

I never said anything was really wrong with magic. At least as long as it is practiced by those who know what they are doing with it, and it's also used for useful and good purposes. I just don't think it can ever replace the actual value of real science and learning the old fashioned way.

Oh yeah, Genoma is like the world outside my window. I can’t go outside without being accosted by snarky trees or tit-mermaids. And every night on the news, like clockwork, some scientist has cummed on yet another lab specimen.

Eh, Cynthia probably means Genoma is geographically closer to Earth than Oz, because all this shit is clearly very real to her.

I really meant Genoma is closer to our world both geographically AND spiritually. And what I mean will be revealed when Mr. Wogglebug goes to Sylvie's world for his second visit and saves it from ending by discovering where all the "golden links" lie between the two worlds.

 

[Spastic Cologne]

That is what other people have told me. But the fact is I was well aware that was meant to be the point of the first book all along. But then the fact is then why would the wizard pretend to give them those fake trinkets of a heart and brain? And especially because all it served was to make them into the most utterly arrogant and delusional bastards. I mean the Scarecrow really is never all that smart in the books as he actually often does things that most average ten-year-olds would know better than to do. And the Tin Woodman really just seems far more obsessed with seeking out ways to glorify himself in his tin body and tin castle and surrounding tin everything than he ever was for seeking out those in need. And yes, I am aware also he once was a human-being, and according to his backstory he should be dead and not alive. So therefore no one knows what it is like to be a disembodied and corrupted soul of a bastard than him. So, what I've always figured is that the wizard had practiced magic he didn't understand in a magic land on magical constructs and thus had unintentionally used some kind of bad magic to put some of his own inner demons of arrogance and self-absorption into those two.

Too dumb to Oz...

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

Cynthia quoted me, great honour to family!

I actually do rebut all of @Trashtaur 's "points" in my book "The Wogglebug's Hidden Truth Behind the History of Oz" in at least one specific chapter, which I highly recommend you guys read as it's available on Amazon at the lowest price I could make it for a 300-page book.

Kay, how about you summarise for us?

That is what other people have told me. But the fact is I was well aware that was meant to be the point of the first book all along. But then the fact is then why would the wizard pretend to give them those fake trinkets of a heart and brain?

You never heard of the placebo effect?

And yes, I am aware also he once was a human-being, and according to his backstory he should be dead and not alive.

I mean, the whole reason he became a tin man is because he was cursed by a witch, so I think the rules of reality are out the window.

So, what I've always figured is that the wizard had practiced magic he didn't understand in a magic land on magical constructs and thus had unintentionally used some kind of bad magic to put some of his own inner demons of arrogance and self-absorption into those two.

I mean, you had Wogglebug declare that killing kittens that hadn’t done anything wrong was Good, Actually, so forgive me if I don’t regard you as an authority on human virtue.

You know, I promised myself I wouldn’t actually engage with Cynthia given she’s the best evidence that human sapience can atrophy, but here I am.

 

[WogglebugLover]

You never heard of the placebo effect?

Of course I have heard of it. That is what made the Wizard's actions so bogus and wrong.

I mean, the whole reason he became a tin man is because he was cursed by a witch, so I think the rules of reality are out the window.

Yes, I know. And that is what I mean. And that is another one of the reasons why Genoma is closer to our world than Oz. Because something like that could never happen there.

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

Yes, I know. And that is what I mean. And that is another one of the reasons why Genoma is closer to our world than Oz. Because something like that could never happen there.

So you’re bragging that your fantasy world is… less fantastical? That’s a very odd selling point for a fantasy franchise aimed at small children. And again, I’m not going to pay for your three hundred page fanfic, could you summarise in a couple of sentences why Wogglebug wasn’t being rude or callous in The Marvelous Land of Oz?

(Yes, I know she won’t answer properly)

Of course I have heard of it. That is what made the Wizard's actions so bogus and wrong.

I mean, they clearly helped.

I really meant Genoma is closer to our world both geographically AND spiritually. And what I mean will be revealed when Mr. Wogglebug goes to Sylvie's world for his second visit and saves it from ending by discovering where all the "golden links" lie between the two worlds.

What the fuck does it mean for another dimension to be “closer” to our world than any other? And what does it matter if Oz doesn’t even exist in your franchise? And as has been pointed out, Oz as depicted in the novels isn’t in another dimension from Earth, it’s on an unknown continent in our world. I normally wouldn’t care, but you clearly think your reading of the Oz books is more accurate, not that you’re making fanfic.

 

[Bloitzhole]

Have you considered selling your books in digital formats on amazon so that they can be read on e-readers? Shipping overseas is rather expensive and this way, an international audience has an easier time ordering your material

ALSO this is what I imagine Cynthia looks like when she reads the thread most of the time:

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

I am amused by Sylvia trying to be cunning. “Heh heh heh, maybe they’ll buy my book!”

 

[WogglebugLover]

1. The minute he shows up he immediately presents his card to everyone, and then gets snippy at the scarecrow after he politely asks him what his initials/titles mean.

No, he doesn't.

2. Although the characters are polite about it, it’s more or less implied that he basically just interrupts their progress so he can tell them his backstory.

It's NOT as if he could possibly have done that on purpose though.

3. The group is never disrespectful towards him in his introduction and even invite him to come along.

How could it possibly have NOT been disrespectful of them to not just tell him why they were on their way to the Emerald City in the first place (regardless of whether or not he had asked). After all he deserved to know it.

4. Then he proceeds to insult Sawhorse and call him useless in a not so subtle play on words, all because he broke his leg.

The sawhorse is not like a real horse and so I don't see much, if anything at all, wrong about that.

5. Tip gets understandably pissed at this and tells him his joke was in poor taste: Wogglebug responds by more or less saying he’s wrong and that his jokes are amazing and flawless because he has a superior IQ, and that only smart people are capable of understanding and making good jokes.

6. He then proceeds to brag about his “great intelligence”, and when Tip criticizes him, Wogglebug basically just calls him retarded for not being “intelligent and educated” enough to understand his obviously superior sense of humor, and that he’s in no place to question him. And finally after that he insults Sawhorse with another shitty pun again.

To be honest I think Tip IS really retarded to rather hang out with and actually defend creatures that are like living toys instead of actual creatures that are meant to be alive like Wogglebug and have real hearts and brains like he does.

And to be honest again, I LIKE the Wogglebug's puns. Always have. And so does my co-writer apparently.

 

[Spastic Cologne]

No, he doesn't.

Good point bro...

Dammit @WogglebugLover!
When the hell was the last time you did anything for anyone besides yourself or the bug?!
Selflessly and without ulterior motive.
Last chance or it never and I mean never happened.
Dear God how is it so difficult for you to think and type up a single instance of you showing generosity?!
Oh yeah, your Cynthia Hanson...

To be honest I think Tip IS really retarded to rather hang out with and actually defend creatures that are like living toys instead of actual creatures that are meant to be alive like Wogglebug and have real hearts and brains like he does.

and a fucking sociopath apparently...

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

The sawhorse is not like a real horse and so I don't see much, if anything at all, wrong about that.

…You do recall that the Sawhorse is a being with a mind and emotions? You know, a person?

To be honest I think Tip IS really retarded to rather hang out with and actually defend creatures that are like living toys instead of actual creatures that are meant to be alive like Wogglebug and have real hearts and brains like he does.

Apparently Cynthia is the real life version of the baddies in films like A.I or X-Men. Obviously it’s pretty harmless in the grand scheme of things (even if Cynthia was bigoted towards groups that actually exist, she never fucking goes outside) but it is kind of unsettling how readily she dismisses a character’s personhood for being a bit different.… while championing a giant fucking bug monster. People call Kiwis racist and shit, and here’s Cynthia declaring that people with artifical limbs don’t deserve to live.

So, next movie night at Cynthia’s place, Pinocchio or Bicentennial Man?

 

[Bubble Ba'ath]

I didnt think it was possible for this thread's interactions with Cherie to get even more autistic but the past two days have blown right by those expectations.

God, this is so the best thread on the farms lol.

 

[Andrew Neiman]

@WogglebugLover Obviously we've established that Dorothy, the Scarecrow, the Tin Man, etc., are disgusting losers and dumb idiot bastards who fail to support and venerate the Wogglebug, but what about Toto? Do you think Toto was fair toward the Wogglebug? Or does he deserve condemnation too?

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

I didnt think it was possible for this thread's interactions with Cherie to get even more autistic but the past two days have blown right by those expectations.

Autism begets autism. That and fathering children in your sixties.

 

[Trashtaur]

The sawhorse is not like a real horse and so I don't see much, if anything at all, wrong about that.

and what is your point here? So what if he isn’t a real horse? He’s still a sapient being with a soul and a mind. He has emotions and thoughts like all the other characters cuz you know…he’s sapient and very much alive.

To be honest I think Tip IS really retarded to rather hang out with and actually defend creatures that are like living toys instead of actual creatures that are meant to be alive like Wogglebug and have real hearts and brains like he does.

And to be honest again, I LIKE the Wogglebug's puns. Always have. And so does my co-writer apparently.

Wtf, I don’t even know where to begin here.

First of all, these “living toys” you speak of are still very much living beings like I said. Just because they’re not flesh and blood doesn’t make them any less alive than the rest of the cast. Fuck man, they’re literally brought to life via magic, and said magic is LITERALLY called the Powder of Life. The fact that you can’t even seem to process the fact that magic is a thing in this world astounds me.

Oh yeah, and how dare Tip stick up for his friends, what an unspeakable thing to do. And never mind the fact that both Sawhorse and Jack are technically his adopted kids (he did bring both of them to life, and Jack even refers to him as his father), so of course he has good reason to care about and defend them.

Also, unironically calling a literal 12-year old retarded. I know this is the Farms and all, but hearing that coming from you of all people…wow.

I can’t say I didn‘t expect it, but considering that children are your main audience regarding your movies and projects…just wow.