Artcow WogglebugLoveProductions / Cynthia Hanson / Cherie Anne Hapney - One Womanchild's Fruitless Quest to Make Her Cockroach Husbando a Household Name

[WogglebugLover]

Nah, better idea - we'll have a party in Cherie's empty apartment while she's gone!

I was speaking with her mom Edith, she's down to join us.

You weren't speaking with my mom. You don't even know her name obviously.

And just everyone knows, I am not a racist. I just feel the Frogman himself would prefer to marry a lady frog and also I've thought of a story about how to make that happen which I won't spoil many details of here.

In case you think this is an isolated experience I have shared your work with numerous Wogglebug appreciators that I am acquainted with, and while all of them praise your artwork and are overjoyed that you have decided to help expand his severely lacking and underappreciated world, they all share the same disbelief and disgust when they come to the constant showings of their homosexuality. I actually had to ban my Niece from viewing anymore content about your movie because of it, and she's a HUGE Wogglebag enjoyer. In fact it made her cry if you must know, but I value her safety and purity first and foremost above your homosexual quest, even at the expense of Wogglebug unfortunately.

I really don't know if you are in fact telling the truth here. But in case you are could you please just tell all those people that I am so sorry if I may have misled them in any way and that I have since edited as many possible implications of homosexuality as I could find in the third movie? And that there really is going to be a Wogglebug and Beetle Princess movie. And you and them can either purchase the movies from my website or watch them on YouTube in case they are unable to play DVDs.

 

[Bloitzhole]

She's asexual in the sense that she's too ugly to get a real partner. So it's easier to say "I'm asexual" than to say, "I look like the Groke from the Moomin books".

Uncanny:

Kiwis observing Cynthia in her discord "relationship", 1955, colorized

 

[Spastic Cologne]

Richard had said about why I shouldn't keep my plan to have Wogglebug be in Genoma like he wasn't in Oz to begin with.

What did ol voice guy say specifically to upset you so much that you sabotaged your relationship with him?

 

[For The Internet]

I don't have to do anything you want me to do that I don't want to do. And you can be sure I will stick completely to my vision of them just being friends and the Wogglebug marrying the Beetle Princess and having children with her and then living happily ever after as the end of the series as I had planned from before the beginning. Just like I didn't give into anything you or Richard had said about why I shouldn't keep my plan to have Wogglebug be in Genoma like he wasn't in Oz to begin with. Because it was something I had planned on ever since I was 12 years old. Even though I had written (and at one point published) Oz fanfiction that made it look like he was happy in Oz I have since thrown that concept into the fantasy rubbish bin. Which is exactly what everyone is going to eventually have to do with the idea of Wogglebug and Frogman being gay.

I don't believe that. And even if there has ever been any truth to that there won't be for long.

Just curious as a long-time reader and participant in this thread: Why is Wogglebug married to a beetle princess if Frogman won't marry a toad?
Beetles are from the order Coleoptera (with some exceptions, biology is complex) and Wogglebug, while being his own creature, is still based on a cockroach. Cockroaches are from the order Blattodea. They're not compatible.
Frogman, being based on a frog, would be from the order Anura. Toads are from the order Anura too, i.e. they are from the same order and are extremely similar. In fact, toads and frogs can interbreed in some circumstances, although mating doesn't really produce viable offspring.


I know you probably will dismiss this as 'just fantasy' so these things don't matter but I really don't understand your reasoning given the scientific background. The thing is, you claim you like to include actual scientific research in your stories to some degree so I'm trying to help out. I've offered help many times before and you usually ignore it, but I thought I'd try again since it's been a few years.

My best guess is that you associate toads with being warty and ugly and gross, whereas frogs are cute and smooth and come in pretty colours (if they're something like a tree frog, with their impressive array of shifting camouflage) To simplify the somewhat complicated classification of the tree frog, you can consider it Hylidae. Tree toads are a thing that occur sometimes in nature when the toad tries to mate with a tree frog (usually producing incompatible with life offspring).

Wogglebug getting it on with a beetle makes zero sense, especially if they mate. Species that cross-breed with cockroaches are a short list if they implant at all. Your best success at doing so is to decide what breed Wogglebug's cockroach side is and research cockroaches that are potentially compatible. Professor Google informs me that crossbreeding has exceedingly poor results but you might get lucky if you mate Blaberus fucus with Blaberus. sp, and even then there are zero guarantees that they'll be fertile and produce live offspring.

I feel a bit gross typing this but you obviously want your characters to settle down with "attractive" insets. but you're going about it all wrong in terms of science and particularly biology.


It's been a years since I covered this in university biology so please sciencefags feel free to correct me if I'm wrong (which could definitely happen after so long, I very much welcome constructive feedback from feel bio-nerds since this sort of insect stuff wasn't my focus). It just seems to be that you could have found "prettier" bugs/amphibians for your characters to settle down with.

Because I'm already this far down the rabbit hole here are some alternatives you could uses where the "mates" are at least in the same ballpark as far as genus and type. Here are some examples very similar to a cockroach that are kind of cute with prettier exoskeletons and colouration:

Melyroidea magnifica

Polyzosteria mitchelli

Elliptorhina javanica

Eucorydia sp.

As for frogs and toads, it's a massive misconception that they're gross and nasty and spread warts to people. In fact, toads don't have warts at all, they're simply bumpy glands. Apart from a lack of research because you want him to have an "attractive" (in relative terms) spouse there is no reason for him to 'settle' for a different species due to your misconceptions. Here are some cute examples of toads you could draw from. I promise they are all wart- and contageon-free:

Brachycephalus ephippium (Pumpkin Toad)

Bufo japonica
Also some pretty and interesting markings.

Bufo viridis (the American Green Toad)

Incilius periglenes (The Golden Toad)
Absolutely stunning golden colour

Bombina bombina (Fire-Belly Toad)
Fascinating and beautiful markings

Those are just a handful of examples. Cynthia, stop trying to make your frog/toad/bug characters attractive. We get that Wogglebug is your ideal partner but this is supposed to be focused on kids. Maybe make it kid friendly? Like maybe give little short science lessons about the different species involved. Kid-appropriate lessons, like preferred habitat, what makes them unique, why they have the colours and markings they do. It would go a long way towards making the books truly education and for their intention (hooking up single characters) less obvious. I've been following you for years (pretty much since page one) and my biggest overall critique is that none of it is concise or age-appropriate. Childrens' fiction needs to have a fun story, yes, but it also needs morals and lessons the child can take to heart and apply to their every day life.

Focus less on finding an "attractive" mate for your characters and focus more on Wogglebug's adventures and the lessons he learns while he's traveling. Worry less about how attractive the mates of him and Frogman are for you personally. I assure you none of the kids care.

I'm not just being mean. Think back to when you read as a kid. Did it matter to you if the prince married a physically beautiful princess, or was what happened important because they had a good heart? If your focus was their appearance then you completely missed the mark and I guess that's something you have to unlearn on your own. No amount of Kiwi help will help you break free of that, you need to work it out yourself.

 

[WogglebugLover]

The Wogglebug is NOT based on cockroaches. He is in fact descended from rare Genoman beetles that Professor Knowitall created. So, he is compatible with the Beetle Princess. And if he wasn't I would have used one of those other insects you described and showed pictures of.

As for the Frogman. I want him to have viable offspring, so I want him to marry a female frog.

And I am trying my best to focus on the morals and lessons of the stories above other things.

 

[Bloitzhole]

Somewhat off-topic here: How's your sleep schedule doing? You seem to be up really late judging from your posting times recently, you feeling okay?

 

[The Man With No Name]

I've read the last 100 pages or so in one evening and the thing that stands out to me is how amazing our world is. A mentally impaired individual can pay money to someone across the world and get made-to-order plushes of their favorite book character created in bulk.

That's an incredible type of luxury to have in the modern era. Imagine explaining that to someone who lived 100 years ago. This whole franchising charade is afforded to someone the vast majority of us would consider tp be in poverty. Incredible.

 

[TapewormSalesman]

Could Cherie's beloved be a genderswapped version of herself? There is something incredibly uncanny about that picture, and there's some odd resemblence between the two of them. Could it be that it's her own face meshed with someone else or just run through a gender swapping app? I tried to test this on faceapp since it's the only one I have, but it recognized her as a male from the start so it was a no go

 

[Phil Ken Sebben]

Ok, whoa, not even totally joking here: so you not only hate the idea of Frogman being gay (which he definitely seems to be, especially given the evidence you've shown us), but you hate the idea of him finding love with another type of amphibian?

I guess I could kind of understand the fact you dislike gays, but are you racist too? What's wrong with toad women? I personally like toads.

You know if Wogglebug ever gained popularity they'd cancel you for that, right?

Cherie's a racist as well I guess. She's against gays because she's not allowing Woggie and Froggie to be happy. She's racist against toads who are like cousins to frogs sure had she said newts then it would be understandable as they're the scum of the salamander family but no. She's racist against toads.

It's been nearly a decade since this thread started and two decades since your obsession with the wogglebug started, and how many sales per month do you get?

Not enough to make this worthwhile, that's for sure.

Nah, better idea - we'll have a party in Cherie's empty apartment while she's gone!

I was speaking with her mom Edith, she's down to join us.

Awesome. The last one was so much fun even if Cherie spent it locked and passed out in her room. The guy that does the Wogglebug's voice was taking suggestions from the crowd to do say in his Wogglebug voice which was hilarious. Especially when we had him propose to Froggie. It's a shame I couldn't get it recorded properly but with all the laughter it wouldn't have been clear. We'll have to invite him back and this time get the guy who voiced Froggy. Maybe we can whip up a video of them getting married on Cherie's computer and use it as evidence that they want this.

Uncanny:
View attachment 3598546
Kiwis observing Cynthia in her discord "relationship", 1955, colorized

I like how you spliced Cherie into the picture. It's really astounding how much she resembles the Groke.

He is in fact descended from rare Genoman beetles that Professor Knowitall created. So, he is compatible with the Beetle Princess. And if he wasn't I would have used one of those other insects you described and showed pictures of.

They're still different species. We've gone over this before Cynthia that unless the Beetle Princess is also a Wogglebug then they can't have kids. And considering that Prof. Knowitall mixed human DNA with whatever the Wogglebug's DNA is then he's no longer really a Wogglebug unless he was something different and Prof. Knowitall created a Wogglebug and he's the only one of his kind.

So unless magic is involved... there's no possible way Woggie can the Princess can have kids.

 

[Overcast]

Sad to say Cherie, but I think they’re right. Wogglebug and his lady friend can’t have physical children.

They could always adopt though! Perhaps something like those living toys like Sawhorse or whatever. Would prove to be great character development for Woggy! Going from making fun of living toys to raising and loving them as his own!

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

I guess I could kind of understand the fact you dislike gays, but are you racist too? What's wrong with toad women? I personally like toads.

Are you really surprised? Her second and third movie are filled with racist and antisemitic stereotypes that would make Klansmen blush. I believe I pointed them all out in my reviews somewhere in the thread.

And just everyone knows, I am not a racist.

Then why do you include so many racist and antisemitic stereotypes and conspiracy theories in your works?

Elliptorhina javanica

Now this looks like Woggy, including the stripes. So, Woggy being a cockroach confirmed.

(Fire-Belly Toad)
Fascinating and beautiful markings

Or bombina variegata

The Wogglebug is NOT based on cockroaches. He is in fact descended from rare Genoman beetles that Professor Knowitall created. So, he is compatible with the Beetle Princess.

This is very incorrect.
First, Woggy is not an insects. Insect have very specific body structure. Every insect in its imago (mature) form has three pairs of legs and three-part body (head, thorax and abdomen). Woggy lacks those features.
Second, beetles pretty much always have wings and very few species that lack wings still have elytra (wing casings) covering their abdomens. Wogglebug does not have them.
So, either he's still in his larval stage or he's not a beetle.

 

[Pedophobe]

I've read the last 100 pages or so in one evening and the thing that stands out to me is how amazing our world is. A mentally impaired individual can pay money to someone across the world and get made-to-order plushes of their favorite book character created in bulk.

WogglebugLove Productions has taught me that anybody who can't get their multimedia project off the ground today has no one to blame but themselves.

 

[WogglebugLover]

Not enough to make this worthwhile, that's for sure.

As far as I'm concerned, it's enough to make it worthwhile.

Awesome. The last one was so much fun even if Cherie spent it locked and passed out in her room. The guy that does the Wogglebug's voice was taking suggestions from the crowd to do say in his Wogglebug voice which was hilarious. Especially when we had him propose to Froggie. It's a shame I couldn't get it recorded properly but with all the laughter it wouldn't have been clear. We'll have to invite him back and this time get the guy who voiced Froggy. Maybe we can whip up a video of them getting married on Cherie's computer and use it as evidence that they want this.

Even if suppose you did do this you still would never get to make the Wogglebug marry the Frogman instead of the Beetle Princesss.

They're still different species. We've gone over this before Cynthia that unless the Beetle Princess is also a Wogglebug then they can't have kids. And considering that Prof. Knowitall mixed human DNA with whatever the Wogglebug's DNA is then he's no longer really a Wogglebug unless he was something different and Prof. Knowitall created a Wogglebug and he's the only one of his kind.

So unless magic is involved... there's no possible way Woggie can the Princess can have kids.

And I've told you before, I am literally just going to act like you had never even said these things and do what I want to do.

Sad to say Cherie, but I think they’re right. Wogglebug and his lady friend can’t have physical children.

They could always adopt though! Perhaps something like those living toys like Sawhorse or whatever. Would prove to be great character development for Woggy! Going from making fun of living toys to raising and loving them as his own!

I took Wogglebug out of Oz and put him into Genoma for the purpose that he wouldn't be burdened with such things personally ever again.

 

[Pedophobe]

The infertile and passionless royal couple could definitely adopt an orphan to be their heir. But who??

 

[ASeabear8952]

Going off-topic here, but if I may. Cherie, why didn’t you move on from this thread years ago? Your current predicament wouldn’t be nearly as bad if you ignored the Farms. Just curious as I’m someone that just started following this story.

 

[Trombonista]

As for the Frogman. I want him to have viable offspring, so I want him to marry a female frog.

But he's not a frog, he's a frogman. And this is fiction, so marrying a toadwoman could still result in viable offspring if you wanted it to.

 

[Overcast]

I took Wogglebug out of Oz and put him into Genoma for the purpose that he wouldn't be burdened with such things personally ever again.

Running from your past never leads to good things, Cherie. Haven't you ever seen The Lion King? Eventually, Wogglebug will have to come to terms with how he was back then and accept it. It's the only way he can truly find peace and become the kind of person you see him as.

Part of being educated and wise is remembering how you once were and how far you came and using that knowledge to better teach those who want to learn from you. How can Wogglebug prove to be a good character for children to look up to if he can't get over his past?

 

[Picklechu]

The Wogglebug is NOT based on cockroaches. He is in fact descended from rare Genoman beetles that Professor Knowitall created. So, he is compatible with the Beetle Princess. And if he wasn't I would have used one of those other insects you described and showed pictures of.

As for the Frogman. I want him to have viable offspring, so I want him to marry a female frog.

You completely pulled both of those statements out of your ass. You had never even thought of either of those things until you read the post you're replying to.

More proof that you're a liar-liar-pants-on-fire.

Somewhat off-topic here: How's your sleep schedule doing? You seem to be up really late judging from your posting times recently, you feeling okay?

Cherie has zero obligations. She spends her entire day watching TV and fantasizing about the Wogglebug. She hasn't had a need to go to bed or to wake up at a normal time since she dropped out of high school.

 

[Woggie's child bride]

The infertile and passionless royal couple could definitely adopt an orphan to be their heir. But who??

Well since WBL seems to have no issue with endless retcons and conflicting origin stories there's no reason it can't be Sylvie even though she was already adopted or better yet some sort of living toy children like @Overcast mentioned. Of course she won't do that because that would almost be a good idea and she hates good ideas and story elements beyond "obvious problem which is fixed with deus ex machina", "everyone praises woggie", and absolutely excessive amounts of sneezing and crying.

If by some miracle she ever reached the point of writing on a level you'd expect from a high school student all it would take to drag her back down would be for us to provide good helpful advice which she will deliberately ignore. The only time she's ever actually listened to us are when there are clear consequences presented if she doesn't do so for example the exposed tree and mermaid tits, and the character models blatantly based on other IPs.

 

[White-Kettle Shufflepunk]

I must say, this actually took me by suprise as well. I can totally understand not wanting to have Wogglebug be gay ( but still respectful of gays, of course) but to not date/marry someone simply due to race/species? Thats so hurtful at face value that Id have to hopefully wait and first see what Cynthia says on the matter. Perhabs she simply mispoke. Surly she will clarify what she means when she has time.

This is the chick who thinks the Tin Man and Scarecrow are evil because they aren’t made of meat, and that Tip was retarded because he didn’t recognise his and the Wogglebug’s natural superiority over non-organic Ozians. She’s the Storm Thurmond of Oz. Actually, Strom Thurmond is a name I’d expect a tinpot dictator in a middle of the road Oz chapter to have.