Inactive Richard "Lowtax" Kyanka - Deadbeat (emphasis on "Dead") founder of Something Awful, forced out of his own community, on his second divorce, stuck his dick in crazy, "Birth Giver"

Chan the Wizard said:
I saw an ad for Potbelly cookies today. If only he had cared about his kids he could have lived to see all kinds of mail ordered baked goods.
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But never again afford them which was the sticking point. He'd have to stick with some sort of local supermarket or mid tier bakery cookies for the rest of his life if you could even call that a life.
 
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Pissmaster said:
Lowtax had a very outspoken hatred of memes, yet had that hanging on his wall for around half of his entire life
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He had a bit of a niche sense of humor, he dug shit that seemed low brow but took some thought to be funny. Like what FYAD thinks they're achieving. If he could've avoided the past two decades of unchecked substance abuse and perhaps got therapy to work through the mountains of psychological baggage that you typically find in excessively coddled momma's boys, he might've been able to leverage a lot of the solid media connections he made in the early 00's into a much more successful career. He earned the bullet he inflicted on himself.
 
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RapidUnplannedDisassembly said:
he might've been able to leverage a lot of the solid media connections he made in the early 00's into a much more successful career.
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Like literally everyone else around him? He was always work shy and entitled, should have been in therapy in college. Dude never wanted a career and had no sense, never spent a minute planning for the future outside of his next box of wine.
 
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TurdFondler said:
Like literally everyone else around him? He was always work shy and entitled, should have been in therapy in college. Dude never wanted a career and had no sense, never spent a minute planning for the future outside of his next box of wine.
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I mean that's not as bad as it sounds that would make him qualified to be CEO of youtube still.
 
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Maude Snew said:
I mean that's not as bad as it sounds that would make him qualified to be CEO of youtube still.
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Him trying to be a streamer years after it already got big was just sad.

I m gonna say something rather inflammatory but lowtax's strongest suit was his "comedy writing" and it only worked in the late 1990s and on the internet were the quality was expected to be shit.

Him trying to step into streaming while being both old and pill addict was just stupid.
 
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TurdFondler said:
It's true, his forte was edgelord midwit humor. But he only got big because he was one of the first with a platform. Almost everywhere outclassed SA by the mid 2000s in comedy writing. For lots of kids only ever seeing print media, SA was a treasure trove. So much weird/alt humor.
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SomethingAwful peaked with Humper-Monkey. The fact that the site wasn't archived with the rise of sites like Tumblr and Reddit was Lowtax's biggest mistake.

Had the site been shut down in 2009-2010, I feel like it would have been remembered much more fondly.
 
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2009-2010 would have been the time to take the hint and pivot to video. Archive the web1.0 shit and start again. Don't bother migrating to xenforo, just lock the old forums and start again. With how many goons volunteered their time for shit he could have had loads of content.

Too bad his brand ambassador came along way too late...
 
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full_metal_lowtax_final.png
 
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TurdFondler said:
Like literally everyone else around him? He was always work shy and entitled, should have been in therapy in college. Dude never wanted a career and had no sense, never spent a minute planning for the future outside of his next box of wine.
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It really is amazing how much of a fuckup he was. If he had half a work ethic, there's no reason he couldn't be living in some luxury condo in Thailand, with more ladybois than he could shake his stick at!

But if he didn't want to work, all he had to do was after his first divorce in 2014, he probably could've gotten a nice 3 bedroom ranch for what, $150 to $250k depending on the market. He could've bought some blue chip dividend stocks so he wouldn't be totally destitute when SA went tits up. He could've gotten a vasectomy, to make sure no future financial liabilities would end up popping outta his nutsack. He could've gotten a 350z instead of a GTR to be his midlife crisis-mobile. He could've bought a mixer and a set of measuring cups so he could make his own damn cookies. And if every year, on his birthday or Valentines day he wanted the tranny hooker to come over and shit on his coffee table, whatever. He could've lived happier than a pig in shit! Watching bad movies, drinking cheap wine, popping pills and shoveling food down his face until he gracelessly expired of a stroke at age 53.
northstar747 said:
Him trying to be a streamer years after it already got big was just sad.

I m gonna say something rather inflammatory but lowtax's strongest suit was his "comedy writing" and it only worked in the late 1990s and on the internet were the quality was expected to be shit.

Him trying to step into streaming while being both old and pill addict was just stupid.
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If I wanted to listen to some middle aged alkie bitch about his ex-wife and his back I could just go down to the local tavern.
 
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