2022 Lolcow Derby - AND DOWN THE STRETCH THEY COME!!!

[irishAzoth]

Keffals is the clear winner this year
Chantal might have to go to the pasture but with her lifestyle she's already been there

 

[MySonDavid]

Patrick might not be ahead of the others yet but he's picked up a blistering amount of speed and momentum.

 

[anliteralidiot]

This is hilarious, and I love everything about this stupid idea.

My money goes to JustinRPG, ole reliable lolcow.

 

[oopsie doodle]

Keffals is in a secret tunnel below the outhouse, via an entrance where you have to fully insert a silicone fire hydrant in order to enter. It takes something away from you, chiefly your anal elasticity, to set foot within. Tread there, and well... stare into the keffals and the keffals stares into you. He's never going to win, both of you will lose.

Contrast this to my boy Fat Rick. Pure milk, baby. Sweet bleating loudly-denying-it-all faggoty milk. He's the fancy-dancy magic-prancy to put your money on.

 

[Sacrarium Spiritus lumine]

a l ate entry for sure, But her legs!!!! (shannyforracing) I know the image is lazy as frick but if any one can do better I will delete this post. @shannyneedstoracebutherlegs!

 

[Vinluv Handesbukia]

this is probably my 4th or 5th favorite schziopost on kf

a strong showing in a crowded field

Gotta step up my game

 

[Velanna]

Byuu or bust

 

[tehpope]

DSP. Always. And where's OPL?

 

[Judgment Boy]

Featuring Vaush as the eager stable master:

(I'm so sorry, Bob Baffert.)

 

[Laidho]

I believe in DSP. He won't let me down. The Horse of Hate has seen many hotshot stallions trying to outrun him, but he outran them all.

 

[John Andrews Stan]

I love knowing how butthurt Vito, Boogie and Mantsu will be to have been omitted from this list.

 

[DabOnJannies]

The only one I disagree with is Ethan Ralph's face on a horse.

He needs to be a truffle pig instead.

No he needs to be shopped onto a pic of an enormous fat fuck riding a horse which is Meigh

 

[Facts Over Feels]

It's definitely between Ralph and Keffals, with Ralph taking it by a nose in a photo finish.

 

[mindlessobserver]

It's definitely between Ralph and Keffals, with Ralph taking it by a nose in a photo finish.

Nah, Ralph will pull an early lead, but he'll trip in the final stretch as always, and probably take another horse down with him.

 

[Vink]

I think KingCobraJFS could be in the running. His birthday stream alone will forever go down in history.

For those who haven't seen it, he had a birthday dinner planned with his family at ~5pm, and decided to pregame with a 750ml of vodka in under an hour on livestream. Was then told by his father he was too drunk to take anywhere and proceeded to drink even more all while saying "I'll show you drunk." It was probably the biggest lolcow shitshow of the year.

 

[DogEatDogFood]

Chris-Chan would be one of those old veteran horses in a stable that won hundreds of trophies in his life and was used to breed a dozen other champions. He already had a fruitful career and it was time to pass the torch to his younger heirs, so he doesn't compete. A true pureblood of autism.

 

[Elbow Greased Strength]

I think KingCobraJFS could be in the running. His birthday stream alone will forever go down in history.

For those who haven't seen it, he had a birthday dinner planned with his family at ~5pm, and decided to pregame with a 750ml of vodka in under an hour on livestream. Was then told by his father he was too drunk to take anywhere and proceeded to drink even more all while saying "I'll show you drunk." It was probably the biggest lolcow shitshow of the year.

I was just about to suggest adding my boy KingCobraJFS to the lineup. That birthday livestream was a lot darker than the broken cigarette video featured here back in August 2021.

 

[redcent]

Is this like the Melbourne cup when every year a horse breaks a leg and it has to be put down ?

 

[Fungible penis]

Surprised Luna Slater didn't make the running, tbh, this kind of long faced parade is her usual stomping grounds.

 

[Unpleasant]

Best thread on the internet.

Keffals leads until Fatrick (who is fat) tumbles on an incline and katamari damacies his way to victory by assimilating the other competitors into a mighty tardblob