Meriasek
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 16, 2020
/edit:
Also, Fatirck owes Quasi 398 years of Twitter checkmark. May he live long and prosper.
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Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter
- Thread starter Caverlock
- Start date
/edit:
Also, Fatirck owes Quasi 398 years of Twitter checkmark. May he live long and prosper.
- Joined
- Jan 29, 2022
That’s vile. Did he try to rhyme or do something else pretentious, or is his writing simply that bad?
- Joined
- Jan 30, 2021
This is shit. I could write better fanfiction than this, and I am barely literate.
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2015
Personally, I like the snippet from In Duh Black "Jenna" from the other forum posted while discussing his most recent spate of one-star reviews:
"Annihilation Fuel" sounds like something the slob releases after a particularly large helping of barely edible Hooligans meatloaf hooks up with all the other rotten matter in his digestive system and causes "reactant mass".
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- Joined
- Mar 15, 2019
I deeply regret reading that except. I'm pretty sure a part of my soul died from how aggressively terrible it was.
- Joined
- Mar 23, 2022
Rick leaves an elephants foot in the hooligans bathroom every single time.
- Joined
- Feb 2, 2022
I haven’t read his excerpts because I only read things written by human beings, not fat pigs.
It’s remarkable how Fatrick continues being able to type and tweet 10,000 times a day while having pig hooves. I’d imagine not smashing multiple keys with his fat fingers must be quite difficult for the porker.
Is that why Fatrick is always soaked in sweat - because of the intense effort required to tweet and text back stalkers, while using pig hooves, 24 hours a day?
Never mind - he’s so sweaty because he’s really fat.
- Joined
- Aug 23, 2022
"FIRST THINGS FIRST, WHERE'S YOUR SHITTER"
- Joined
- Feb 28, 2020
His attempt to ape cockney speech is embarassing. Let’s take a look at the masterpiece he’s bastardizing.
Here is the opening description of Scrooge. Note the excessive descriptors of his visage and character.
Here is the scene where Scrooge begrudgingly gives Bob Crachet a single day off. Notice that though Bob is poor, he speaks properly, because he’s a classy dude.
This is the scene where the ghost of Christmas past shows him the moment he lost sight of what’s really important- love, and replaces it with love of money. Belle’s vocabulary is precise and proper.
Here is a bit where Tiny Tim is such a good saintly little Christian, he brings his father to tears with his eloquent generosity.
Ah, finally some more sordid characters. The ghost of Christmas future shows Scrooge’s scullery maid and laundress heartlessly selling his few miserly possessions after his death. These are gross, criminal characters. But they STILL don’t have shitty forced phonetic dialect written, because you can tell by their actions and grammar how they speak in a cockney accent. DEW YEW FINK OI KIN GIT A BIT O SPELLENG, MISTAH FATRICK SAH?
Scrooge has awoken from his visions, alive and well, and with true joy and love in his heart. After cackling and dancing like a schoolboy, he giddily exclaims his intent to be different.
And the final passage, we see that he learned the true meaning of Christmas, and lived well for the rest of his days.
At no point is Dickens’ prose anything but spectacular. At no point is his dialogue clunky speak-n-spell noise. The entire point of the story is an old man, seemingly too far gone to redeem, being given a final chance to choose virtue and love, and taking it. Even Marley, a soul in hell, begs Scrooge to change his ways lest he suffer the same fate. The entire point of Fat’s shitty fanfic is for good old Scrooge to encourage saintly Tim to murder in vengeance. Patrick is such a failure.
Here is the opening description of Scrooge. Note the excessive descriptors of his visage and character.
Here is the scene where Scrooge begrudgingly gives Bob Crachet a single day off. Notice that though Bob is poor, he speaks properly, because he’s a classy dude.
This is the scene where the ghost of Christmas past shows him the moment he lost sight of what’s really important- love, and replaces it with love of money. Belle’s vocabulary is precise and proper.
Here is a bit where Tiny Tim is such a good saintly little Christian, he brings his father to tears with his eloquent generosity.
Ah, finally some more sordid characters. The ghost of Christmas future shows Scrooge’s scullery maid and laundress heartlessly selling his few miserly possessions after his death. These are gross, criminal characters. But they STILL don’t have shitty forced phonetic dialect written, because you can tell by their actions and grammar how they speak in a cockney accent. DEW YEW FINK OI KIN GIT A BIT O SPELLENG, MISTAH FATRICK SAH?
Scrooge has awoken from his visions, alive and well, and with true joy and love in his heart. After cackling and dancing like a schoolboy, he giddily exclaims his intent to be different.
And the final passage, we see that he learned the true meaning of Christmas, and lived well for the rest of his days.
At no point is Dickens’ prose anything but spectacular. At no point is his dialogue clunky speak-n-spell noise. The entire point of the story is an old man, seemingly too far gone to redeem, being given a final chance to choose virtue and love, and taking it. Even Marley, a soul in hell, begs Scrooge to change his ways lest he suffer the same fate. The entire point of Fat’s shitty fanfic is for good old Scrooge to encourage saintly Tim to murder in vengeance. Patrick is such a failure.
- Joined
- Feb 10, 2015
Sonichu is to Sonic/Pokémon as Fatrick Tiny Tim is to A Christmas Carol.
That’s not totally fair. Chris is a better writer and did his own artwork.
That’s not totally fair. Chris is a better writer and did his own artwork.
- Joined
- Dec 27, 2015
it also doesn't help that the dialect can't make up its mind whether it's pseudo-cockney or Irish
in fairness, that's mostly because phonetic reproduction generally wasn't a thing until the early 20th century modernist era; one exception is "Wuthering Heights", which has a few characters who speak rural Yorkshire dialect
but yeah, Rick's writing is still a big pile of shit
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BScCollateral
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 28, 2018
Also, when Twain did it, he felt the need to defend his choice.
- Joined
- Jul 8, 2020
It's time for Fat Rick E-mail like every day I hope that it's from a female. Aw, man, not a female.
Dear Fat Rick
Do you take off your pig hooves and sweaty fat face when you go to bed?
Sincerely
Dan Mullen, Tekken.
Well that's a stupid question Dan child.
Do you take off your face and hands before you go to bed, child?
And if so are you some kind of robot?
-Fat Pig
BScCollateral
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- May 28, 2018
I love Dick Van Dyke to death. I understand he springs for elaborate spooky Halloween displays every year, so elaborate people come from miles around.
That said, why the FUCK they didn't just have his chimney sweep talk in his normal voice and say "I'm Canadian" when asked...
Reactant mass is usually called "reaction mass" or "propellant", and I'm actually surprised he knows the difference between it and "fuel." Fuel is consumed to accelerate propellant to produce thrust.
- Joined
- Dec 28, 2014
Van Dyke actually apologized for that accent. More than Pat would ever do about anything.
- Joined
- Jun 15, 2020
Is this Fat Rick’s worst own goal ever? That writing is so dogshit that I’m getting second-hand cringe all the way from here. How can he take so long to do such a crap job of this?
- Joined
- Feb 8, 2021
Can't spend much time writing when you're busy getting the last word in on the stalker children all day long.
- Joined
- May 31, 2021
For those familiar with Peep Show, how many of you agree that Fatrick’s life, if described, could be mistaken for a character from that show?
It’s just impossible levels of fail after fail, yet he still doesn’t kill himself.
Jez and Mark at least had each other, even if they were often the reason for each other’s misfortunes and humiliation.
Perhaps Nikki also has a tragically comic life of fail, but because she has marginally more dignity than to tweet constantly about it, we know much less.
Perhaps Nikki is Mark to Patrick’s Jez.
It’s just impossible levels of fail after fail, yet he still doesn’t kill himself.
Jez and Mark at least had each other, even if they were often the reason for each other’s misfortunes and humiliation.
Perhaps Nikki also has a tragically comic life of fail, but because she has marginally more dignity than to tweet constantly about it, we know much less.
Perhaps Nikki is Mark to Patrick’s Jez.
TheGuntinator
kiwifarms.net
- Joined
- Oct 30, 2021
Mark my words, Patrick is going to release the full book days before Christmas, and everyone will be able to tell the last few chapters were rushed. It will flop because everyone already had their cozy holiday stories picked out by then and the Kiwifarms will win again.
- Joined
- May 31, 2021
Sounds like a present you would buy someone for a joke.