Cultcow Evangelist Dr. Robert McKim, Sr. - Carrollton, Ohio: crazy preacher, "doxing is illegal!!!" Apocalypse bacon. BISEXUAL. Downs Syndrome, wears PAJAMAS to church

Silvana Rosechu said:
Both of these posts talk about the rapture. Is that diagram something he did himself?
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Here's what the actual rapture is going to be for Bob:

He's sitting there in the middle of the night, screaming toothlessly into his webcam and shitposting on facebook.

Suddenly, all of the lights in Pastor Bob's Trailer of Righteous Bacon go out.

The stacks of bibles and religious books in Bob's trailer all combust spontaneously.

Sirius by the Alan Parsons Project starts playing from Bob's computer speakers.

Bob is terrified and confused, surrounded by flaming bibles and prog rock.

There are three bangs on the door, followed by the door being blown off it's hinges.

Standing there, surrounded by billowing smoke and fully decked out in his biker leathers and sunglasses, is John Andrews.

All he does is say
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before dragging Bob, kicking and screaming, out of his trailer by the ear to force him to buy some healthy food and get a real job.

Renee sits there and drools the whole time.
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I rate this post 100% :autism:
 
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re: the glasses. The good Reverend Doctor would likely have tormented the people running the store forever if they'd decided to do him any form of favour. If they'd repaired the glasses, he would have been back the next day saying it wasn't good enough and have them fix it again. After that he'd 'find' scratches on the lenses that could have only come from the people fixing them, and then jump up and down until they replaced the lenses. On and on it'd go until Robert was scamming a new pair of glasses off of them every second week. And at no time would he be happy. The more they pandered to him, the more he terrorised them both in person and online, the worse he got. No relief from him until the owner gave up and sold the business, and upped and moved 1000km away.

Don't get me wrong, I feel for the man. I'm legally blind without corrective lenses, and the lenses alone sitting on my nose right now were $700. I walk around with nearly $1000 of kit perched on the end of my nose. It gets nerve wracking when I stop and think about it. But the people who make these things do some insanely painstaking work and they've a living to own. And Reverend Bob would take active pleasure in running them out of town because they could do nothing right. It's pretty foul. I wouldn't even have taped the glasses were I in their place. I'd just tell him to fuck off.
 
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Silvana Rosechu said:
Just to add to what was already said, he posted on Facebook about the glasses as well. All they did was tape them. He TOLD them he was an ordained minister. How dare they not care.
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He's posted on Facebook a couple of times about different prophecies. The first one was I believe was the exact same post from his ministry page, but he also posted about receiving an email from Jim Bakker. He apparently e-mailed him with a whole bunch of his "prophecies". My favorite is when he dreamt that something was happening on the news and something was actually happening on the news. HOLY SHIT.
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I also quite enjoyed his post about how God is a jealous God who kills people to get our attention and make a point.
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Hey, @BOLDYSPICY! - since you're the Christian authority in our group, can you make any sense out of this stuff? Both of these posts talk about the rapture. Is that diagram something he did himself? Does it make any sense?
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(Edited because I apparently can't type today)
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Literally do not take anything as gospel (heh) regarding Revelations. Ask five pastors (actual pastors with training) for their take on Revelations and you'll get seven different answers. It's weird prophetic shit that was written by a crazy person going through the first century equivalent of an acid trip while writing, basically what amounts to a coded anti-Roman screed.

They'll mostly agree that there's a timeline of events that happens before the end of the world, though they won't agree on the order. The picture is basically a timeline of some of the prophesied events. There's supposed to be things like the creation of a one-world government (which most nutters take to be the UN), the "great falling away" is people leaving the church (which most nutters believe is evidenced in trends in the west of declining religious participation). Both of these are things that he's ranted about. Other Christian groups believe that the Rapture comes first (all saved souls go straight to heaven) while he seems to think that the tribulations start before the Rapture happens.

Really precise nitpicking, like he does there, is also not very well regarded among people who actually study this stuff from a historical perspective given that he's reading a translation of a translation of a translation of a translation, etc of the original - which also adds to the unclear understanding of events since concepts in one language don't necessarily translate well to others. Getting lost in the minutiae of one word's use over the other isn't important.
 
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Some really early (16th century) sources for Rapture doctrine state that it will come halfway through the Tribulations, meaning that even those chosen of God will have to live through part of the End Times. When Pentecostalism became an established sect around 1830, though, most Pentecostal theologians ignored those earliest sources and it was generally agreed that the Rapture would occur pre-Tribulation, so that while the rest of humanity suffered here on Earth, the unbelievers would be given seven years to accept the Lord before the Second Coming.

These days most mainstream Pentecostals believe in a pre-Tribulation Rapture, a la the Left Behind series. In fact, the only major religious leader who preaches mid-tribulation Rapture is...Jim Bakker. Who is pretty clearly using it to convince people to buy his Tribulation survival buckets.
 
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The Knife said:
Some really early (16th century) sources for Rapture doctrine state that it will come halfway through the Tribulations, meaning that even those chosen of God will have to live through part of the End Times.
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It is worth noting here that "early" for Rapture doctrine is 16th century, i.e. about 1500 years after the life of Christ and well after most basic tenets of Christian doctrine had been well established. On a related note, it is also worth noting that you won't read anything in the Church Fathers (St. Augustine, St. Thomas Aquinas, St. Jerome, etc.) that sounds anything like modern Rapture dogma.

Basically, I think there is a very strong case to be made that, like Purgatory, the Rapture is little more than Bible fan-fiction based on a completely absurd misreading of Scripture.
 
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The Giver said:
It is worth noting here that "early" for Rapture doctrine is 16th century, i.e. about 1500 years after the life of Christ and well after most basic tenets of Christian doctrine had been well established. On a related note, it is also worth noting that you won't read anything in the Church Fathers (St. Augustine, St. Thomas Aquinas, St. Jerome, etc.) that sounds anything like modern Rapture dogma.

Basically, I think there is a very strong case to be made that, like Purgatory, the Rapture is little more than Bible fan-fiction based on a completely absurd misreading of Scripture.
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It's also worth noting that when the modern pre-tribulation Rapture doctrine was "revealed" (since you can't really say it was based on any scriptural doctrine; most of came out of self-proclaimed prophets whose scriptural semantics pretty closely resemble Brad Watson's), they predicted that the Rapture was going to happen within the next ten years, leading to a religious let-down deliciously named "The Great Disappointment." Pentecostals and Charismatics have been in this Rapture game for a loooooooong time, and they are always convinced that this time, they've got the date right. Yet somehow, here we still are.
 
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The Knife said:
It's also worth noting that when the modern pre-tribulation Rapture doctrine was "revealed" (since you can't really say it was based on any scriptural doctrine; most of came out of self-proclaimed prophets whose scriptural semantics pretty closely resemble Brad Watson's), they predicted that the Rapture was going to happen within the next ten years, leading to a religious let-down deliciously named "The Great Disappointment." Pentecostals and Charismatics have been in this Rapture game for a loooooooong time, and they are always convinced that this time, they've got the date right. Yet somehow, here we still are.
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Yes -- William Miller and the 1844 non-event. The Seventh-Day Adventists emerged out of that mess.
 
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He made a video around this time yesterday, so he might be active about now. I've got my fingers crossed he's got some goodness for us tonight. In the meantime, if this doesn't get you feeling the Holy Spirit, I don't know what will. Aretha Franklin is a living treasure, and this is a really clever cover of an American classic.
If he doesn't drop anything in the next hour or two, I've got some videos I can post/analyze.

EDIT- He's answering Youtube comments, so he's up and about.
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Thought he'd have posted something by now, oh well. Here's a video where he's in a good mood. He actually laughs a couple of times. Also interesting to note that I'm Dead found this video a couple of days before I did, and commented on the video, noticed the same thing I did.

 
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sugoi-chan said:
The highlights are at 1:15 ("lulz of the land") and at 12:15 (where he talks about the vision). Rest of the video isn't worth watching. It's an exceptionally whiney, "stop picking on me" video.
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He has a really interesting definition of hate crime. "Hating someone due to sexual orientation is a crime, and you hate me because I don't accept your sexual orientation, therefore you've committed a hate crime against me."

He also repeats his clever-clever opinion about homosexuality: "They're born that way, all right...IN THE PIT OF HELL" because Satan has power to manipulate people in the womb so that they will be born gay. If that is the case, it seems kind of a dick move to hate the sin of homosexuality, because that would mean that gay people were attacked in the womb by an evil, all-powerful entity they did not choose and couldn't fight off. His hatred becomes akin to hating a baby because of a birth defect. I'm sure this hasn't occurred to him.
 
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