I copied this passage, mistakes and all, onto a writing to IQ algorithm (to the best of my ability, I'm phonefagging atm) and it determined what we already knew, Pat is a midwit:
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The website claims his score is average but how does an IQ of 93 compare to the standard Amerimutt?
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Even with 10 years to hone his craft and six books under his size 58 belt, Rick's writing is markedly below average. He writes like a sassy sheboon/SmarterChild Chimera and can't figure out why his books don't sell. Maybe if he would stop day drinking and attempt to average more than 50 words per day (excluding his twitter oinking), we might notice some improvement. Unfortunately for any prospective publishers, Rick is a true lolcow and will ignore any genuinely good advice. And one more thing 1.2:
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My ghost writing services start at $11,000 per book; $1,000 per every IQ point I have to compensate for.