Artcow WogglebugLoveProductions / Cynthia Hanson / Cherie Anne Hapney - One Womanchild's Fruitless Quest to Make Her Cockroach Husbando a Household Name

[Illuminati Order Official]

That's not her tactic though, her initial price barely cutting a profit before shipping costs and then she sells at half off of that.

That's because she's the kind of person who sees a big sign with "50% OFF!!!!!" and she believes it's really half of the original price. In other words, a retard.

 

[Falcon Sebben]

It's absolute lunacy to launch a product and mark them at 50% or 75% off during a first run, even if it's still making a profit.

That's because she's a retard who doesn't understand how money, or anything, works.

She gets disability but Mommy is the one that controls the purse strings. If she wants something she asks her mother for it and she either gets the money or her Mommy buys it for her. She's never had to work for it and doesn't understand the value of a dollar.

 

[Woggly Wand Wizard]

That's because she's a retard who doesn't understand how money, or anything, works.

She gets disability but Mommy is the one that controls the purse strings. If she wants something she asks her mother for it and she either gets the money or her Mommy buys it for her. She's never had to work for it and doesn't understand the value of a dollar.

I wonder how much her mother knows about the innerworkings of the Woggleconomy....

Would also be interesting to hear the conversation with her mother about why she needs $1000 for Woggleplushies (+$300-500 shipping and handling).

 

[NerdShamer]

Guys, the Woggleconomy doesn't runs off of money; it thrives on the false hope that it provides Cynthia Hanson so she'll continue preaching about how the fabulous Wogglebug is certainly not gay.

 

[Woggly Wand Wizard]

She has just released Woggle-Vlog 89 for the third time. This time it's about pre-ordering her upcoming book adaptations of her movies.

Apparently she has an illustrator who is "willing to give her another chance" even though he is "a little costly but he's worth it."
I wonder how many Woggle-bucks she's shelling out for this..... Does her mom know?!

Edit: how much so you guys think the first book adaptation will cost?
Im betting theres gonna be 12 pages at $50 a pop for a total of $600 for book one.

 

[CiaphasCain]

Apparently she has an illustrator who is "willing to give her another chance" even though he is "a little costly but he's worth it."

Basically he said "fine, pay me a ton of money and I'll do your dumb shit"

 

[Juhlonduss]

What's the consensus on her teeth? It looks like she's missing quite a few up top, but it's hard to tell through the inability to emote and the pull of gravity on her facial fat.

 

[Picklechu]

What's the consensus on her teeth? It looks like she's missing quite a few up top, but it's hard to tell through the inability to emote and the pull of gravity on her facial fat.

She has dentures. She chugged soda and shoveled pie down her throat until her teeth rotted out of her skull.

 

[Spastic Cologne]

I wonder how much her mother knows about the innerworkings of the Woggleconomy....

I wonder how many Woggle-bucks she's shelling out for this..... Does her mom know?!

Without question the most effort Cynthia has ever put into anything is consistently and very purposely concealing from/ being dishonest with her family regarding what she spends their hard earned Wogglebucks on, for at least a decade now.

She realizes very consciously that if they ever found out the true extent of her sinking thousands of their Wogglmoolah into obvious scams and catastrophic investments, such as this latest Wogglplush debacle, they'd cut down the internet and take control of her Wogglfinances, even more so than they already have.

@WogglebugLover mentioned a while back how she can't get a bank account/card in her own name anymore because she fucked up bad and massively overdrew from her now closed account by a significant amount that she's yet to disclose.

What she spent this exorbitant amount on exactly is anyone's guess but my moneys on somthing/things Woggle related.
Me thinks the time might just line up with her meeting her ex husband to be, the legitimate business man known publicly as Simeon...

Now Wogglmom refuses to let her open another account with a different bank for fear that dear stupid Cherie will no doubt with 100% certainty repeat the exact same action over and over again till the Hapney family is rendered Wogglbankrupt...
Now every financial decision is made under the watchful eye of Wogglmom, well almost...

By systematically lying to her loved ones, for years now, sweet idiot Cynthia has been able to fund her Woggladdiction by siphoning her allowance intended for various bills, groceries, clothes, dog ear medicine into the perpetually lit furnace that is WogglebugLoveProductions...

In fact @WogglebugLover's greatest fear is Wogglmother being shown this very site and learning to her absolute horror what her idiot daughter is slowly putting her family into debt over, scammers and plushies and Woggle oh my!
Anyone got her number by chance?

 

[Woggly Wand Wizard]

She has dentures. She chugged soda and shoveled pie down her throat until her teeth rotted out of her skull.

oh shit. does she really? no foolin?

Without question the most effort Cynthia has ever put into anything is consistently and very purposely being dishonest with her family about what she spends there hard earned Wogglebucks on, for at least a decade now.

She realizes very consciously that if they ever found out the true extent of her sinking thousands of their Wogglmoolah into obvious scams and catastrophic investments like this latest Wogglplush debacle they'd cut down the internet and take control of her Wogglfinances even more than they already have.

That all makes sense, thanks for posting and thanks especially for the use of Wogglewords. Half the reason I come to this thread is the shitty Wogglepuns. I love it.

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

oh shit. does she really? no foolin?

True and Honest truth, straight from the horse's toothless mouth:

https://kiwifarms.st/threads/woggle...a-hanson-cherie-anne-hapney.4351/post-7361950

 

[lightswitchdoll]

oh shit. does she really? no foolin?

She doesn't always wear them - you'd think she'd put them in for her videos but no.

In fact... I don't think she wears them at all anymore. I just tried to find a video with them in and I gave up (admittedly I'm half asleep and not THAT enthusiastic). Maybe they hurt her mouth.

She's wearing dentures in the first ever wogglevlog but I don't know if these are her current ones.

WogglebugLover has just posted her first vlog. It's somehow creepier than I expected.
(Bonus: Can you find the Wogglebug plush in the background?)

 

[Schwarzwald]

True and Honest truth, straight from the horse's toothless mouth:

I want to see Wogglebug do a series of PSA's on the importance of taking care of one's teeth by brushing and flossing, education and staying in school, not talking to and believing strangers over the internet at face value, self-reliance and not taking advantage of those close to you, being good stewards of money by making good financial decisions, living a healthy lifestyle through exercise and monitoring food intake while not taking shortcuts from using unproven and dangerous scam pills, being tolerant of others with differences in viewpoints (for example, Christians and atheists), and listening to and taking advice from others.

No particular reason I chose those categories, but yes it has to be those categories in particular.

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

No particular reason I chose those categories, but yes it has to be those categories in particular.

It's not outside the realm of possibility. After all he already talks a lot about being intelligent and funny.

 

[Woggly Wand Wizard]

Cherie's been hard at work burning that midnight oil. She uploaded this one at about 3am PST.
Also I think we might have hit a wall here, this is the FORTH time she has released Woggle-Vlog 89.

Woggle-Vlog 89 - Pre-Order Movie Novelization of "Sylvie and the Wogglebug."​

The first two chapters are done! This will give us whole new great and valuable insight into the hearts and minds of the two main characters. ​

 

[Picklechu]

Cherie confirmed for not being able to count past 89. She must have dropped out of school right before they learned 90.

 

[Starbuxxx]

It's a coded message, if she uploads another "Vlog 89" it means she's being held captive by the guy who takes selfies in home depot bathrooms, and needs help. #FreeCynthia

 

[Budgie]

This is one of those threads that's just maddening to read. Cows don't normally frustrate the shit out of me but reading Cynthia's spergery makes me feel like I'm experiencing Groundhog Day except if Groundhog Day lasted nearly nine years.

Edit because I do have to say it's nice seeing a thread geared towards someone who's more just a classic example of a cow and not some tranny nonce. There are too many of those.

 

[Illuminati Order Official]

Edit because I do have to say it's nice seeing a thread geared towards someone who's more just a classic example of a cow and not some tranny nonce. There are too many of those.

Yes, it's really refreshing to see a classic lolcow. Add some thirst \ sexual deviancy, maybe a bit of family drama and she's just like a female version of early Chris.

 

[Unabomber Eleven]

Might just hang back for a bit as my last couple posts feel a tad A-loggy...

Woggle-loggy



My absolute favorite scene in the movie series so far (I believe in “The Wogglebug and Sylvia and the Enchanted Forest and and and” - seriously Cynthia, commas exist for a very practical and non-autistic reason) is when Sylvia and Wogglebug first enter the palace/castle of King Ethano et al and the following (paraphrased) exchange occurs:

Sylvia: “are there more giant Wogglebugs like you Mr Wogglebug?”

Wogglebug: “No”

(Several seconds of awkward silence ensures as they walk off screen….this would not happen with a real child as it would be followed by about 65,000 more questions…I know this and I don’t even have kids or want to cater content to them!)

Fucking PLATINUM

Edited to add my 2 cents thus far. One of the best threads on the Farms by far!