🐷 Ethan Ralph's Twitter / Tweets - A collection of thoughts, insights and musings from the internet's favorite gunted hobbit

[FiveStarAce]

If Ralph wasn't as feeble as a baby GIRL, I would too be concerned for May.

Fact is, May is documented as physically stronger than Ralph when they did some arm wrestling, Ralph later did some coping on that, and she's also got at least 6 inches reach on Ralph, he can just hold him at bay with arm stretched out like a cartoon.

If Ralph ever lays a hand on May, it'll only prove that May is a masochist.

Ralph does a mean "too pathetic to beat" routine with women. He even has suicide-baiting tech!

 

[Mango Cobra]

I think you're right about how there would have been a pillstream as a result of the Chiefs losing, but I must point out that the Chiefs have meme magic behind them as one of their primary players is named L'Jarius Sneed.

Shit, now I don't want them to loose just because of his name.

 

[MirnaMinkoff]

Ralph let his horse talk him out of betting on the Bengals, big missed opportunity for some easy money. Everyone knew the Bills were going to blow it. I made some decent money betting on Cincinnati yesterday. Sucks you weren't able to do the same, Ralph!
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If Meigh wasn't a pedophile, I'd be concerned for her well-being. Ralph is eventually gonna come down from his xannie/alcohol bender and realize Meigh talked him out of making a safe bet that would've netted him a healthy profit. Good thing she is a pedophile and I don't care what happens to her, whether it's a hoof to the face or something worse.

Now it’s totally Pantsu’s fault he can’t cover the Feb rent and buy diapers. Got to pillstream an extra 25 hours because of a dumb whore. If it wasn’t for her they’d be eating DoorDash and Rozy would have baby food. Good going Pantsu. No bottle water for you this week!

 

[AnOminous]

Ralph let his horse talk him out of betting on the Bengals, big missed opportunity for some easy money. Everyone knew the Bills were going to blow it. I made some decent money betting on Cincinnati yesterday. Sucks you weren't able to do the same, Ralph!

It's still generally a negative expectation wager. Sportsbooks have gotten really good at not giving good odds lately. Also if Ralph bet on it he'd have cursed it so it came out the other way.

Day trips to Cancun? Sounds like a baller that can easily afford an attorney.

It's probably not that expensive if all he does is go to Burger King (and eat trash from the dumpster).

 

[Harold the Jewelry Buyer]

It's probably not that expensive if all he does is go to Burger King (and eat trash from the dumpster).

Do the Mexican DoorDashers charge extra if they're instructed to rummage through the Burger King trash cans for a burger?

 

[Capt. Jean Luc Ritard]

It's still generally a negative expectation wager. Sportsbooks have gotten really good at not giving good odds lately. Also if Ralph bet on it he'd have cursed it so it came out the other way.

It's probably not that expensive if all he does is go to Burger King (and eat trash from the dumpster).

Well with all the apps and it being legalized, they have more data than ever before and can even better predict what numbskulls like Ralph are liable to do.

The algorithm has not yet accounted for pedophile brides talking a user out of their bet during the user's 5 day bender, however.

 

[SaidNoOneEver]

Shit, now I don't want them to loose just because of his name.

Autographed jersey available on Amazon for $130. NGL that's a pretty good deal.

https://www.amazon.com/LJarius-Signed-Autographed-Kansas-Chiefs/dp/B09G8GGC43

I wish I would've known this picture existed when PPP lost everything on the Chargers last week.

 

[REGENDarySumanai]

Autographed jersey available on Amazon for $130. NGL that's a pretty good deal.

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https://www.amazon.com/LJarius-Signed-Autographed-Kansas-Chiefs/dp/B09G8GGC43

I wish I would've known this picture existed when PPP lost everything on the Chargers last week.

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You would have to use this image instead.

 

[disavow]

You would have to use this image instead. View attachment 4321331

Things just haven't been the same since Chris Chan's dimensional merge kicked off holy shit lmao

 

[Ratso Bronum]

Stardust got a YT ban and Ralph has asked Keemstar for help

TWEET/ARCHIVE

Keem says it was probably his interview that caused it

TWEET/ARCHIVE

Ralph did not take that very well

TWEET/ARCHIVE

 

[Hüftpriester]

Ralph has found a new woman to impotently rage at.

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lmao, rejected

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Ralph thinks she's sucked off a lot worse than the Memphis Micro. X to doubt.

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let's compare her physical appearance to Ralph's pedophile horsebride.

oof....that's tough.

 

[MeltyTW]

Ralph has found a new woman to impotently rage at.
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lmao, rejected
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Ralph thinks she's sucked off a lot worse than the Memphis Micro. X to doubt.
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let's compare her physical appearance to Ralph's pedophile horsebride.
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oof....that's tough.

just random women dunking on him again like high school, he really is a mirror of Chris chan, at least he had gal pals before revenge porning them

 

[AltisticRight]

Ralph has found a new woman to impotently rage at.
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lmao, rejected
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Ralph thinks she's sucked off a lot worse than the Memphis Micro. X to doubt.
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let's compare her physical appearance to Ralph's pedophile horsebride.
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oof....that's tough.

Ethan is like that retarded high school kid we all knew with shit grades, horrendous body odour, and thinks he's the smartest piece of crayon in the jar after he watches a YouTube video/reads an article on some pop science magazine. Oh big boy Ethan learned a fancy word from some britbong, he must show it off! Every aspect of the word "slattern" applies to Ethan Ralph and his ugly demonic paedophile bride, far more than anyone he's tossed the word he doesn't understand at.

 

[Procrastinhater]

Ralph did not take that very well

That's the Ralph we've grown to know and love.
The man has the soul of a poet.

 

[Freeman]

This is the sort of thing that matters to Ralph, not his wife or child or his health or even his sideshow of a life in general, it's ratioing Keemstar, quite the W ralph, you sad freak.


Can't archive for some reason.

https://twitter.com/TheRalphRetort/status/1617631052515926016

 

[JustSomeDong]

let's compare her physical appearance to Ralph's pedophile horsebride.

Hitting the wall at 30mph vs 90mph.

 

[Near]

Ralph, you're not Donald Trump.

 

[AltisticRight]

Ralph has found a new woman to impotently rage at.
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lmao, rejected
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Ralph thinks she's sucked off a lot worse than the Memphis Micro. X to doubt.
View attachment 4321921
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let's compare her physical appearance to Ralph's pedophile horsebride.
View attachment 4321943View attachment 4321947
oof....that's tough.

Ethan's insults are so limited and grade school level you can put phrases into a box and draw them out at random, it'll be the perfect Gunt insult. This is a man in his near-40s acting like a 13-year-old. "Haha U sucked lots of dick", his brain must be so pickled to muster "art of the written word" literary masterpieces like this.

Oink harder.

 

[UnKillFill]

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Ralph your dog died, remember?

Old Tug probably would have loved that steak before you starved him to death though.

 

[Truly Rural]

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I have no clue whats this about