Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.5%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 197 14.1%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 794 57.0%

  • Total voters
    1,394
If he lost movement to the other arm, he'd waddle around like a fat penguin and that image is amusing to me.

jack is the ozzy osbourne of chefs, he'll never die

Shake it for Ozzy man!

Just saw this shit advertised on boomerbook (Myomo), wonder if Jack has considered asking for a sponsorship? Might need two of them now.

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Jack would struggle trying to pair it to Wifi or Bluetooth or something and get angy. Of course it doesn't pair to anything, but Jack didn't read the manual.
 
It's quite horrifying how effective modern medicine is with regards to keeping people alive when their body tries to shut down as a result of sheer abuse.
I dunno, doesn't seem like Jack is taking any meds against clotting...
(hasn't apparently since his first transient stroke lmao)
Christ is Kang

(On another note, if the COPD diagnosis Garett was told about is for real and not just a misunderstanding that is some bad shit, that will do him in slow and nasty.)
 
Jack would struggle trying to pair it to Wifi or Bluetooth or something and get angy. Of course it doesn't pair to anything, but Jack didn't read the manual.
That's already happened. It was some product review... I think for a slow cooker and he could never get it to pair properly so he threw a fit, called it garbage and returned it as is.

The man is an asshole.
 
That's already happened. It was some product review... I think for a slow cooker and he could never get it to pair properly so he threw a fit, called it garbage and returned it as is.

The man is an asshole.

I'm pretty sure you're referring to this one, but I would be very unsurprised to find out there were multiple instances.

 
It can't get any worse than this, right?


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Does anyone know the source for this clip from the Waddle video? I'm entranced every time I see it. Watching Jack move around in the world is like watching the Titanic sink in real time.
 
Does anyone have any guess on what slop will bring him down for good? I actually don't think it'll be any sort of food born illness. Or even a meat honestly. I think he's gonna die from choking on something like a chicken bone. Slurping the meat off of a wing by himself shirtless and accidentally sucks to hard and it gets stuck. Either that he'll go out like the King, on the shitter.
 
Does anyone have any guess on what slop will bring him down for good? I actually don't think it'll be any sort of food born illness. Or even a meat honestly. I think he's gonna die from choking on something like a chicken bone. Slurping the meat off of a wing by himself shirtless and accidentally sucks to hard and it gets stuck. Either that he'll go out like the King, on the shitter.
It's not going to be anything exciting IMO, he'll probably just go in the night from sleep apnea.
 
I'm pretty sure you're referring to this one, but I would be very unsurprised to find out there were multiple instances.
That was the one. Of all things to get WiFi enabled a crockpot. Most of them have timers you can set so that it won't start until a certain time like you want it to cook for 6 hours but you're leaving to go to work at 8 am and won't be back until 6pm. So what do you do? Set the timer for 4 hours to start and boom! It's ready as you walk in the door.

But no he needs to get this cheap Chinesium crap because it's bluetooth / WiFi enabled. And it's not as if he needs it because the faggot doesn't work, doesn't drive, can barely walk. It's just some more crap to spend with MommyWife's money.

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It seems the situation with Jack is still more serious than he’s letting on.
I've always found things like this funny. Supposedly nothing happens without God's knowledge or because he wants it to happen according to these people. So how do you then go from there to praying for God to heal her fat lump of a husband after several strokes and at least one heart attack plus all the other health issues he has? Do they think that God is just waiting for one more person to start praying before he decides to do something?

It's lunacy to me.
 
I've always found things like this funny. Supposedly nothing happens without God's knowledge or because he wants it to happen according to these people. So how do you then go from there to praying for God to heal her fat lump of a husband after several strokes and at least one heart attack plus all the other health issues he has? Do they think that God is just waiting for one more person to start praying before he decides to do something?

It's lunacy to me.
Near as I can figure it, they think god's a bit of an asshole. Like, he's fine watching you suffer but if you ask reeeeaaallly nicely he might be persuaded to end your suffering. It's good for you, it keeps you humble.

It's how Jack and company seem to choose to interact with god's creation, so it would follow that they'd think the Almighty would take the same approach to his faithful as they do with drive-thru workers.
 
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