Careercow Jack Russell Scalfani / Cooking With Jack / Jack on the Go Show / jakatak - YouTube "Celebrity" "Chef", Living Encyclopedia of Gluttony-Induced Maladies, Salmonella Elemental

When will Jack drop dead?

  • February-March 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • April-May 2024

    Votes: 6 0.4%
  • June-July 2024

    Votes: 18 1.3%
  • August-September 2024

    Votes: 34 2.4%
  • October-November 2024

    Votes: 37 2.7%
  • December 2024

    Votes: 44 3.2%
  • Sometime in 2025

    Votes: 258 18.5%
  • Sometime in 2026

    Votes: 197 14.2%
  • Jack lives forever. The Wendigo Must Consoom

    Votes: 792 56.9%

  • Total voters
    1,392
Lot's of people die shitting. They blow a blood vessel in their brain and just go.
Watched a police documentary recently and there is at least one unnoticed toilet death every other episode, mostly old people btw.

17% to 41% of heart attacks cases occur during the nighttime hours of 10 p.m. to 6 a.m. and in relation to the bathroom, it has to do with straining. It's not exactly a stroke or aneurysm, as you've put it.
 
Jack Junior stuff

So does Jack Junior still live with Stroke Jack and work at a gas station? Cause its really funny picturing this household with a gas station clerk leaving for work at 6 am, with his wife having a seizure up in the spare bedroom, and Jack stroking out on the toilet in the bathroom downstairs, as Tammy researches the next fast food meal to try out
 
So does Jack Junior still live with Stroke Jack and work at a gas station? Cause its really funny picturing this household with a gas station clerk leaving for work at 6 am, with his wife having a seizure up in the spare bedroom, and Jack stroking out on the toilet in the bathroom downstairs, as Tammy researches the next fast food meal to try out
Mama mia! The latest Wendy’s drop is a healthy burger alternative, the chicken parm sangwich! Mommywife should sneak one into ICE for Jackie

Deathfat drops
 
The eating healthy for the last year and a half thing is fucking hilarious. This is what he cooked immediately after starting his diet when he was still high on the idea of making a lifestyle change.

Each serving has a pound of undrained, greasy ground beef, a cup of sour cream, and a pound of cheese. He think is this is healthy. I literally can’t comprehend how someone can use a full five pound bag of shredded cheese in a recipe and think its healthy, but alas…

Keto can certainly be healthy, but you gotta do healthy fats and not throw cheese and sour cream on everything. Saturated fat is not good and cheese and ground beef are loaded with it.

Like if you did lean ground chicken/turkey stuffed peppers without the cheese and sour cream (no idea what else to fill it with besides chicken and onion, but I am sure there's good recipes out there on the internet).

A lot of people go keto and then just throw butter on everything, but the reality is you still gotta eat healthy fats and you still want to consume the correct number of calories. Just throwing extra fats on stuff to replace carbs can lead to even worse health because fats are way more calorie dense and saturated fat is bad.
 
Screenshot 2023-02-01 at 16-04-08 Keto Taco Stuffed Peppers.png


:shit-eating:
 
Anyway, with a heart attack and yet another stroke, I doubt we'll see any more videos from Jack. He was already in shit condition and he might not even be able to speak after this.
I disagree. In his mind, stopping the videos is tantamount to letting the haters win. This is because the haters have been gleefully placing bets on which medical emergency kills/incapacitates him enough to make him stop. He probably sees continuing on, even out of spite and in a severely disabled state, as sticking it to them. In his mind, continuing on is walking waddling proof that he’s strong and undaunted by the negativity. Almost like “haha, fuck you assholes, I’m still here.”

Christ, imagine JOTG where Tammy (in pure hack fashion) juggles the driving, camera work, ordering, and narration all at once because her invalid husband exercises control over her even as a near-vegetable?
>Tammy: *spoon feeds Jack some slop* “Is it gud?”
>Jack: *blinks twice for ‘yes’*

One-upping the haturz by, after a health emergency caused by his horrid lifestyle, going into overdrive to destroy whatever is left of him physically. Out of spite. Good grief…


The eating healthy for the last year and a half thing is fucking hilarious. This is what he cooked immediately after starting his diet when he was still high on the idea of making a lifestyle change.

Each serving has a pound of undrained, greasy ground beef, a cup of sour cream, and a pound of cheese. He think is this is healthy. I literally can’t comprehend how someone can use a full five pound bag of shredded cheese in a recipe and think its healthy, but alas…

To me, this one is worse.

Should’ve just eaten the blocks of cream cheese all by themselves at that point. That’s all this recipe is- cheese. The peppers in this recipe (and the one you posted) are a useless augmentation, because the stuffing is so unhealthy that it negates any nutritional value from the peppers. The peppers are included for the sole purpose of providing cope for fatties- so that they can delude themselves into thinking that the dish might actually have some health value. Or maybe it’s Profile by Sanford trying some kind of baby-steps approach towards adults who never outgrew the palates they had as children.

“Okay sure, it may not be that healthy…but it includes a vegetable! You’re moving in the right direction, considering you originally planned to have three Arby’s sandwiches tonight…”
 
To be the fair, Jack the Wendigo seems to be chugging along still defying god, when even one of the strokes would've taken another obese man out. Maybe there is something to this "leaning keto" and "smart cheating", at least if you don't mind the vacuous slurring and you'll just need to find yourself a Tammy™.
 
Keto can certainly be healthy, but you gotta do healthy fats and not throw cheese and sour cream on everything. Saturated fat is not good and cheese and ground beef are loaded with it.

Like if you did lean ground chicken/turkey stuffed peppers without the cheese and sour cream (no idea what else to fill it with besides chicken and onion, but I am sure there's good recipes out there on the internet).

A lot of people go keto and then just throw butter on everything, but the reality is you still gotta eat healthy fats and you still want to consume the correct number of calories. Just throwing extra fats on stuff to replace carbs can lead to even worse health because fats are way more calorie dense and saturated fat is bad.
Saturated fats aren't as bad as most people make them out to be and are arguably necessary
HOWEVER, as all things in life, moderation and balance are key. Just because butter is healthier than margarine doesn't mean you should eat 3 pounds of butter on top of 6 pounds of cheese at each meal.
 
So does Jack Junior still live with Stroke Jack and work at a gas station? Cause its really funny picturing this household with a gas station clerk leaving for work at 6 am, with his wife having a seizure up in the spare bedroom, and Jack stroking out on the toilet in the bathroom downstairs, as Tammy researches the next fast food meal to try out
Nah, he and Brianna moved out a while back. They even adopted two chocolate lab puppies without checking that they could have dogs in their apartment. Surprise! They couldn't, so had to sell/rehome their dogs like the responsible little family they aren't.

1675267601127.png
 
Nah, he and Brianna moved out a while back. They even adopted two chocolate lab puppies without checking that they could have dogs in their apartment. Surprise! They couldn't, so had to sell/rehome their dogs like the responsible little family they aren't.

View attachment 4395936

No way it was because of the apartment.

They just didn't know what they were getting into by getting TWO LAB PUPPIES

That's worse than two human babies

jfc
 
Jack Junior has confirmed that Jack had a stroke and a heart attack.

View attachment 4391560
"Healthy lifestyle"?

Yeah Jr. is either trolling teh intarwebs to "own the haturz" or he's as mushbrained as his father.

Elvis probably Elvised out and died on the throne because of his serious opioid habits. That causes your shit to clump up and turn into a boulder-like mass. Trying to squeeze something like that out rapidly turns into a massive effort, and if you have an aneurysm or something already, KABLOOEY, or you just stroke out or have a heart attack trying to force out this bowling ball.
Yeah this is the unofficial official reason behind it. The man was severely constipated due to his drug use. People used to say he'd go in and take a dump and walk out later having looked like he dropped 10 pounds. Which he probably did.

The eating healthy for the last year and a half thing is fucking hilarious. This is what he cooked immediately after starting his diet when he was still high on the idea of making a lifestyle change.

Each serving has a pound of undrained, greasy ground beef, a cup of sour cream, and a pound of cheese. He think is this is healthy. I literally can’t comprehend how someone can use a full five pound bag of shredded cheese in a recipe and think its healthy, but alas…

The bell pepper makes it healthy! DUH!
 
Jack Junior has confirmed that Jack had a stroke and a heart attack.

View attachment 4391560
This all but confirms to me that Tammy was the one updating his FaceBook. There’s no way Jack would’ve been coherent that soon after the onset of his double-whammy of an emergency.

C’mon, y’all remember how much those posts didn’t sound like Jack…


This has to be an auto-upload, right?


Who mentions their bf before their wife when it comes to health issues? Oh, right...
Three possibilities:

1.) Junior mentioned his bf first out of pure childishness. He may be married, but he’s really still a kid.

2.) Junior would’ve listed her first, but he was distracted mid-thought by visions of his barely legal bf’s smooth skin, tight ass, boyish face clad in peach fuzz, and wiry twink pecker roto-rooting out his balloon knot. He subconsciously listed him first because the lust he feels towards his friend overpowers any feelings towards his second-fiddle beard.

3.) @captkrisma is right:
I'll give Jr the benefit of the doubt and think he's listing the issues chronologically.
 
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