Patrick Sean Tomlinson / @stealthygeek / "Torque Wheeler" / @RealAutomanic / Kempesh / Padawan v2.5 - "Conservative" sci-fi author with TDS, armed "drunk with anger management issues" and terminated parental rights, actual tough guy, obese, paid Quasi, paid thousands to be repeatedly unbanned from Twitter

[Schwarzwald]

Fatty making the rounds on Reddit again. Post removed but the comments are still open. Patrick is in CorrecT the Record mode rn.

This is the kind of shit that could get someone fired from their job.

Thank goodness Pat doesn't have to worry about that.

 

[MavisBeaconTeachesSnipin]

You will never be a real sci-fi author. You have no imagination, you have no talent for writing, you have no fans. You are a homosexual man twisted by internet trivia and pop media into a crude mockery of genre fiction.

All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your former publisher is disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your lack of twitter clout behind closed doors.

Avid readers are utterly repulsed by you. Thousands of hours of consuming quality books have allowed readers to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even your stories that “pass” for the first few pages read as stilted and uninteresting. Your prose structure is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a soy boy to buy your book, he’ll turn tail and bolt the second he gets a whiff of the police report where you threatened to kill your ex-wife and infant daughter.

You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself the "stalkers" are going to jail, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight (of your fatness).

 

[Plaintiff is fat]

Worm analyst Pat makes another appearance on the bigfoot show. On the last clip he made it about a Hollywood franchise but surely he has something more to contribute than pop culture references, right?

Bzzz, wrong. They hired him as the retard layman the braindead viewers can relate to and then have a bunch of marine biologists and animal behavior experts actually comment with authority hahaha, his "science communication" gig is being the resident hick.

This one is from S04E06, More to come.

 

[Spunt]

What's it about poetry that
Makes retards spam that top hat?
But Lim'rick or haiku
Whichever you do,
We all agree Patrick is fat.

 

[Ophelia]

Kurlan, Kurland, or Kurlansky? Can Patrick even read?

Patirck has been known to misspell his own name.

You are a homosexual man

Ahem, I think the word you’re looking for is “faggot.”

 

[AnyballLecter]

Pat however, for all of his bullshit, he needs ONA and kiwifarms alive. Without them, who is he? Just some fat faggot pretending to be some sort of street tough wise guy that no one cares about. It's only by the good graces of a united brothermen that Pat has any value in this world.

This is wildly delusional. Stop huffing your own farts. Great, you found a rageaholic who cannot help but feed his trolls.

He has not gained anything from this. It is possible if the Norm Macdonald criticism incident had not happened that he would not have made much more progress career wise, and he would just be an aspiring writer/comedian with a day job. However he is not getting any money, fame or career advancement from all the negative attention.

 

[Sarn’t]

Pat
Dull, Fat
Grinding, Eating, Childing
I would not have sex
Debtor

A didactic cinquain for our corpuscular writer, who is now apparently a worm expert? I’ve not been keeping up with fat but clearly I should

 

[Die Dunkle Maus]

What's it about poetry that
Makes retards spam that top hat?
But Lim'rick or haiku
Whichever you do,
We all agree Patrick is fat.

It's odd, for some reason I DESPISE the limericks, while I think the haikus are masterworks.

I won't ever give a fellow artiste a top hat, though. I'm not a piece of subhuman garbage, after all... that's something PAT would do.

 

[S.C.U.D.]

Worm analyst Pat makes another appearance on the bigfoot show. On the last clip he made it about a Hollywood franchise but surely he has something more to contribute than pop culture references, right?
View attachment 4426972
Bzzz, wrong. They hired him as the retard layman the braindead viewers can relate to and then have a bunch of marine biologists and animal behavior experts actually comment with authority hahaha, his "science communication" gig is being the resident hick.

This one is from S04E06, More to come.

Not fat by any medical standard, child.

 

[Battlecruiser3000ad]

Do they let you tweet in prison?

Oopsie doodles.

Seriously though, imagine if he somehow survived the first 24 hours and were forced to quit that shit cold turkey. What would happen to him? Would he start shaking and typing "child" on an hallucinated keyboard? And after that, if he survived the withdrawal, what then? Would he become productive? Would he actually write books again?

Thinking more about it now, he would probably child the other prisoners and get killed right away anyway. Oh well.

The prison letters would be a natural continuity to his text messages. Oinking at stalkers to stop contacting his cell number.

 

[AnOminous]

I love how he thinks anyone will take the prison threat seriously when he's lost every court case he's brought against people, including some dumbass A-log who gave him his name and actually travelled to a bar to confront him, and this has been going on for years.

Honestly the only person more addicted to making pathetic, limp dick threats that intimidate nobody and everyone just laughs at is Tommy Tooter.

Fatty is a complete joke.

 

[Maude Snew]

Patirck has been known to misspell his own name.

And misstate his name in court on the record as Thomas. I wish I had that clip handy, his court recordings are gold. Need to step up my archive game. Take an equally hilarious moment and personal favorite of mine as penance.

 

[Clusterfuckk2]

And misstate his name in court on the record as Thomas. I wish I had that clip handy, his court recordings are gold. Need to step up my archive game. Take an equally hilarious moment and personal favorite of mine as penance.
View attachment 4428244

Can’t wait for Pats episode of ‘Great Gardens’ on HGTV.

 

[The Feline Solution]

Thinking more about it now, he would probably child the other prisoners and get killed right away anyway. Oh well.

In a prison setting, i would give Pat not even five minutes until the first nigger goes "Who you callin' child, motherfucker?", then the assraping starts.

View attachment 4427396
Not fat by any medical standard, child.

The camera adds 200 pounds, child.

 

[Your Favorite New Friend]

His mom [...] gave him his motto in life, "#Don'tLetTheIdiotsWin",

Imagine being such a loyal son that you fail at everything in life just to obey your parents! You're truly keeping the idiot from winning, Fatrick.

 

[siegemeister675]

On O&A they're saying Fatrick is the new Chris Chan. I agree except I think Fatrick is funnier because you can laugh as much as you want at him and you'll never feel bad about it. Chris is kind of pathetic and you feel for him but Fatrick's entire existence and everything he says and does is infuriating.

 

[Mikoyan]

On O&A they're saying Fatrick is the new Chris Chan. I agree except I think Fatrick is funnier because you can laugh as much as you want at him and you'll never feel bad about it. Chris is kind of pathetic and you feel for him but Fatrick's entire existence and everything he says and does is infuriating.

lmao. As I said in the meta thread about the lock over here, Fatrick is a fine cow but the OnA guys have no perspective about him. He doesn't even rate compared to the violent dysfunction of Chris, Ralph, Yaniv, Keffals, fuck, he's not even as straight up wild as Terry Davis. And he's also nowhere near as accomplished as Terry.

Call me back when he crayon-draws a comic about PSTville.

 

[Trans Randy]

On O&A they're saying Fatrick is the new Chris Chan. I agree except I think Fatrick is funnier because you can laugh as much as you want at him and you'll never feel bad about it. Chris is kind of pathetic and you feel for him but Fatrick's entire existence and everything he says and does is infuriating.

Every lolcow is called the new Chris-chan eventually. Personally I see Fatshit more like a modern-era DSP or Wings. A Ragecow.

 

[KingOfGains]

Every lolcow is called the new Chris-chan eventually. Personally I see Fatshit more like a modern-era DSP or Wings. A Ragecow.

We will probably never have another Chrischan.

Pat to reach that level of pure bliss would he'd have to lose literally everything to Quasi, have a mental break down unlike the world have ever seen, turn trans, then get trolled by a psycho woman in college to rape his mother and wife before trying to set Hooli's on fire. Could you imagine that trial?

"NO, CHILD! THAT DID NOT HAPPEN! I WAS FINGER PAINTING IN MY ROOM WHEN THE FIRES STARTED. NO, CHILD! WRONG IN EVERY DETAIL AGAIN, CHILD! I TRIPPED AND FELL ON MY MOTHER WHEN MY PANTS FELL. THERE WAS NO RAPE. WE JUST LAUGHED IT OFF!"

 

[Die Dunkle Maus]

Patty's no Chris-Chan, there's no tragedy here!

Only fat. That's what makes Patty so precious, and why he inspires such love and devotion.

I have always felt intense pity for Chris(tine)... Pat elicits no pity from me, only joy and adoration.