The Tenacious Unicorn Ranch / @TenaciousRanch / Steampunk Penny / Penellope Logue / Phillip Matthew Logue - Don't cry because it ended, laugh because it's still getting worse.

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Who are the top three strongest characters in the Kevin Gibes Inflated Universe (KGIU) canon?

  • Gash Coyote

    Votes: 102 4.5%
  • Rioley

    Votes: 277 12.3%
  • Penis

    Votes: 408 18.1%
  • Loathsome Dung Eater Jen

    Votes: 291 12.9%
  • Boner

    Votes: 294 13.0%
  • Kevin Gibes

    Votes: 671 29.7%
  • The Elusive Earl

    Votes: 701 31.0%
  • Landon Hiscock

    Votes: 262 11.6%
  • The Korps LARP Brigade

    Votes: 200 8.9%
  • Kiwifarms Militia

    Votes: 1,122 49.7%
  • Kindness

    Votes: 650 28.8%
  • Trans Cucumber The Child Abandoner

    Votes: 306 13.6%

  • Total voters
    2,258
I made some Tranch art for yas to enjoy...

spooky_troonpaca.png
If dreams could come true...
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Crouching Paca Missing Boner
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Boner's new Purgatory
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Wedge after Paca Reassignment Surgery.
(Less gross than an actual neo-vag.)
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Dysgenic Tranch
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Trancher Hell aka Trancher's Inferno: Circle of Dead, "Pets."
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Penis' Mom's Backyard.

Thank you @Humbert Humbert for the tranchster.pngs

"It happened, therefore it can happen again." -Primo Levi
 
Why do you think it melted?

Edit:

I'm going to disagree with people on one aspect of The Tranch, series 2: I do think that in any case of Kevvie having a go at Phil's grandmother, the result is going to be one very surprised, frightened, and hurt Kevin, which we'll probably hear about at great length.
It's just a feeling, but I don't think Penny will tolerate any abuse of her (other than any he may do himself).

Inclined to agree.

As I said before, Penny may alter events in his head to anything that he does is good and for the best for everyone, but his protectiveness of her might outweigh his bizarre care for Kevvie.

Related, I just cannot understand why Penny (or anyone else) likes Kevvie.

With all fairness I can muster, I can imagine he might be fun to get high with (who isn't of course, but he is possibly unintentionally funny when high), and maybe he would be entertaining to watch while hanging out drinking in a park.
But virtually everyone I have ever known has always wound up sick of adults who are as childish as him.

Including dumb fuckwits, sad pub bore incels, even sympathetic and clearly special cat women.

I am not even going to bring up the twitter pop philosophy garbage, because I doubt he goes into that in real life conversations.

Of course I am speculating based on some snippets of video and his personal accounts of his life, but I am imagining he is just a boring stoner, who goes on about toys, cartoons, games, weird sexual stuff he doesn't really understand or have genuine experience of.
His voice would get to me as well, as I said earlier.
And to be candid, I am really intolerant of stupid people or people who have no idea how to be funny yet try far too hard.
Stupid people who think they are funny but clueless about their ability to project humor really rub me the wrong way.

Perhaps I have totally misread him and there is a huge side to him I won't see that Penny genuinely loves, but I just find him thoroughly unlikeable, and that is even before considering he is a lazy, work-shy, freeloader, who thinks he deserves a living from internet people.
 
Related, I just cannot understand why Penny (or anyone else) likes Kevvie.

But virtually everyone I have ever known has always wound up sick of adults who are as childish as him.

Perhaps I have totally misread him and there is a huge side to him I won't see that Penny genuinely loves, but I just find him thoroughly unlikeable, and that is even before considering he is a lazy, work-shy, freeloader, who thinks he deserves a living from internet people.
Penny derives his self-esteem from being a leader & provider. He also likely feels guilty about abandoning his real children, so Kevin and Jen serve as replacements. Kevin is a worthless manchild and Jen is a semi-disabled shut-in, and they're both strongly dependent on Penny. [They'd be totally screwed if he ever threw them out...]

It's been mentioned before that despite the three of them supposedly being in a BDSM polycule, they very rarely have sex. But it makes sense when you consider that Penny (as the "Mxstress" of the polycule) never really valued them for sex in the first place. They're his "pets", and while Kevin might claim that's some kind of kink thing... for Penny, it's much more literal. He enjoys taking care of Kevin & Jen like they're cute dogs, and it makes him feel like less of a failure.
 
Text message from Penny to Bonnie's mother, transcript:

Hello,

Due to the last four months of violent harassment from the title holder Bonnie Nelson (also known as [redacted] ) we are forced to leave this house as quickly as possible for our safety and my health. We have moved our persons off the property late last month. This harassment has included false reporting to state and federal authorities, slander online, as well as inciting others to do violence to us. We have absolutely no other option than to flee you and Bonnie's property with what we can safely leave with.
I have had to give away 150,000.00 worth of livestock and much, much more and to be frank we will not be paying yalls mortgage any longer nor the loan between yall as you will be collecting the full value of the house we have been paying for for the last three years.
We will be taking the month of February to move. I would ask as we have never been late on a payment and have tried to make this as amicable as possible that the harassment stop as you are getting what yall want and we are just trying to get safely away from you.

We had a dumpster reserved for March as we were going to begin our move then, there's a considerable wait to get the 30 yard variety in the valley, so I [text cut off] it's easier for you to dispose of.

Personally I am appalled and saddened by this absolutely uncalled for attack.

I ask only to be shown the same respect and restraint that I have shown through this.

Please give us until the end of Feb so we can leave without being harmed and we will more than willingly give you the value of the home. My health has made it a bit more difficult as im coordinating with others to move everything. There's absolutely no need for violence, we have cooperated with yall this entire time, me and my family are leaving without protest.

Penny

To me this sounds like theyre ree-nigging on a mortgage or something they likely begged whomevers parents were. Is there any evidence of that in the thread?
 
Didn't know it was that easy to stop paying a mortgage, just a stern "not paying ya'll" and it's a wrap.

No wonder troons are God's chosen people.
Eh, it's a mortgage in Paul, Paul's transphobe mom, and Sky. There absolutely was no written agreement for Phil and co. to act as a lease, so they have 0 legal responsibility to fuck off whenever.

Now the mortgage bearers are stuck with a property which value has plummeted and no longer have tenants to actually pay the mortgage. Unless someone moves in, Paul just played himself like a tard.
 
Inclined to agree.

As I said before, Penny may alter events in his head to anything that he does is good and for the best for everyone, but his protectiveness of her might outweigh his bizarre care for Kevvie.

Related, I just cannot understand why Penny (or anyone else) likes Kevvie.

With all fairness I can muster, I can imagine he might be fun to get high with (who isn't of course, but he is possibly unintentionally funny when high), and maybe he would be entertaining to watch while hanging out drinking in a park.
But virtually everyone I have ever known has always wound up sick of adults who are as childish as him.

Including dumb fuckwits, sad pub bore incels, even sympathetic and clearly special cat women.

I am not even going to bring up the twitter pop philosophy garbage, because I doubt he goes into that in real life conversations.

Of course I am speculating based on some snippets of video and his personal accounts of his life, but I am imagining he is just a boring stoner, who goes on about toys, cartoons, games, weird sexual stuff he doesn't really understand or have genuine experience of.
His voice would get to me as well, as I said earlier.
And to be candid, I am really intolerant of stupid people or people who have no idea how to be funny yet try far too hard.
Stupid people who think they are funny but clueless about their ability to project humor really rub me the wrong way.

Perhaps I have totally misread him and there is a huge side to him I won't see that Penny genuinely loves, but I just find him thoroughly unlikeable, and that is even before considering he is a lazy, work-shy, freeloader, who thinks he deserves a living from internet people.
i dont know how much of a sex drive (or even physical capability) Penny has, but i do know that weak men like him are most weak to coom, which Kevin can be (theoretically) utilised for more so than poor old Grams.

then again, Penny might look at things logically- what does grandma provide? Home, the potential of inheritance

what does kevin provide?

aside of hand jobs- in fact, think it would be generous to call whatever happened on Valentines Day, a hand job- Kevin said his hands were tied behind his back and were 'used' to get off with by 'a cutie'


mf cant even give a hand job himself. smh

and then, we have the question of the likability- Kevin clearly doesn't have much for him, but what he has against him is vast

Kev spends around 50 dollars a day on average, on absolute shit. for himself. *
thats honest to god drug habit money - but at least drugs get taken and disappear, they don't just endlessly clog up the living space.
I cant even say how annoyed I would be to have someone in my living situation- not even a partner, but literally just someone i lived with, buying all that shit. and doing nothing to earn it, just buying plastic shit that means nothing and props up an industry which is killing the planet for the sake of literally nothing except corporate greed- they aren't even for kids to play with and honestly enjoy, they are for musty men to stack on a sticky shelf.

the fact that Kevin does this anyway faintly annoys me and i don't even live on the same continent as him, so god knows how irritating it would be in person, as you struggle for money, as your empire falls into ruin around your head, you're desperately trying to book a dumpster in a last ditch attempt to move out of the house in a fashion that isn't completely white trash, and the you see the postman driving up hill, for the forth time this week.

Maybe if Penny seemed to have any interest in collecting the same sort of shit i could see why he'd tolerate it but he doesn't, or at least is too busy flapping around failing that he dosnt have the time to demonstrate that interest.

honestly, it would make me fume that my so called partner was such a selfish piece of shit, much as i have no warmth to any of them, the sheer level of Kevins bad behaviour even makes me feel bad on his polyquels account.

to actually be them...the well of resentments must run super deep, perhaps its just waiting to be tapped by some issue.

though saying that , i cant see what Kevin would do thats much worse than his general existence anyway, and their portion of the relationship seems to have puttered along okay til now.

maybe its just that they dont even question the notion that they deserve better or that there's other people out there, due to isolation- Penny that is- Kevin spends all day networking on twitter, and has lined himself up plenty of other contacts should things go south / should the fucking penny ever drop for Penny.

*for all the talk of 'spoons', Kevin puts a great deal of time into organising his purchases and detailing the lore of all his shitty storylines of kid shows, both to himself and disseminating it on twitter.

Imagine, once out of the 7 days a week he does this, if one day he chose instead to spend that 50-100 dollars on some lush ingredients from the store, scoped out a special recipe, and made it for everyone for dinner, think how much good favour that single act would earn him, imagine how happy it would make his so called wives to be thought of and have the slightest thing done for them.
doing that once a week...honestly even once a month

shit, the transmascs could lick the plates clean, too.
(they dont need much to eat)
 
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Jesus fucking christ. I don't even know where to start, ya'll.

Firstly; My nigga tranny, are you really going to pretend that you don't know a lease works? You didn't build the house, you didn't sign a land-only lease, the value of the house is already included in the property. The house with the melted stove, cat piss floors, and who knows what other hoarders grade horrors lurking.

Additionally, after three years of tranny squatting as tranny neglect and negligence (not to mention stench) has reduced the value of that property exponentially I'm sure.
Don't forget the deck that became firewood and went up in smoke.
Lol, remember when how when you end a lease there is an inspection that you left the property in the same shape as when you moved in except for normal wear and tear? How the fuck are they gonna explain the floor boards being rotten through and through by cat-piss and that someone broke down the deck and literally burned it all up in the fireplace?

I fully expect there to be legal drama to come from this.

To me this sounds like theyre ree-nigging on a mortgage or something they likely begged whomevers parents were. Is there any evidence of that in the thread?
To me this sounds like they are providing written evidence that they had a landlord/tenant relation in a situation where beforehand it might just have been a verbal agreement between friends. Lol.
You lived there under unclear circumstances legally whether you were actually renting or not. During your stay you have caused significant physical damage to the property, including literally burning the deck and turning the land into a moonscape.
This written admission that you fully understood you were a tenant renting the place will be very important in the upcoming legal saga for damages to the property.

Is Kevin at least smart enough to put all that on Youtube? For monetization?
Maybe, with some luck. I mean they have utterly destroyed both the building as well as the land. It is basically worthless now so Bonnie's really only option is to go after them legally. Troon against troon legal battle.
To save face and get some sympathy for "evicting vulnerable troons and then suing them" it might make sense for him to actually do a tear-filled youtube of "look here, another thing that these people destroyed. they destroyed everything, my life is in ruins".
It is in his best interest to show his followers just how badly they destroyed his property and that he is the actual victim here.
 
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Yeah there's going to be legal drama, but with no signed lease and defendants with no real assets it's not going to amount to much more than a bunch of histrionics and legal bills.

The bank will take its pound of flesh from Bonnie's mom, the only person with anything worth taking, and leave her credit in shambles. Most normal people would feel pretty ashamed to do this to their mother during her declining years while she battles cancer, but Paul 100% does not give a shit.
 
And to be candid, I am really intolerant of stupid people or people who have no idea how to be funny yet try far too hard.
Stupid people who think they are funny but clueless about their ability to project humor really rub me the wrong way.
This might be precisely why Pennywise loves him: Penny is stupid. He's stupid enough to have a misspelling or grammatical error every other post. He's stupid enough to own the ranch and make all the bad choices. But so is Kevin, so their intellect makes each other much more relatable than they are to each other than to the rest of us with an IQ above room temperature. Hell, Kevin thinks Penny is SMARTER than him, and like how Butthead is marginally smarter than Beavis, that might be true. Kevin excitedly talks about how smart Mxtress is sometimes, how much he thinks Penny is big and strong and cool and purty and tough and smart, which are rare complements for a complete and total fuckup this man is. Kevin is a part of his image, he's a follower and true believer who kisses his butt and says he's amazing. Kevin's the Alyssa to Penny's Bonnie in that sense: Pen/Bon want someone to kiss their ass and tell them they're great, Kevin/Alyssa play that role and act the part of vulnerable people in need of protecting. Penny also likes the fantasy of being a provider and independent: he does like showering Kevie with meaningless toys when money allows. He "takes care" of Kevin by enabling his bad habits, and Kevin ADORES that someone accepts him as he is (his flaws of indulging in too much consoom, blindly following things, wanting to not work and be spoiled, and being extra uncomfortably fetish oriented) so he's on board with Penny 100%. Kevin hates thinking and wants a smooth easy ride of hedonism, and Penny provides.

Kevin and Penny did have sexual interest in common when PenPen and KevKev both had it all intact down there, but now they're more like pet and pet owner and shower each other in emotional validation and many different sperg facts. I forgot their shared interest but I know they have them, and Kevin is at least pretend enjoying politics.

TL;DR: Penny likes having someone idolize him, Kevin loves someone who enables his habits. They're strangely perfect foe each other in that sense.

I wish I knew more about Jen and Pen to make a proper analysis on why they work. It just feels like the two are old friends who enjoy the same politics, hobbies, and such from what I can tell, and have the same reeeeeeee mentality.

Most normal people would feel pretty ashamed to do this to their mother during her declining years while she battles cancer, but Paul 100% does not give a shit.
He's just going to be upset when his mom doesn't leave more to him in her will.
 
@Humbert Humbert

- Freebie AIs are smart, but they still need to be informed of what a specific Kevin and his butternut noggin looks like so to speak. Otherwise you'll get a squash on a hairless orangutan bod.
I thought you said they needed to be informed of what Kevin looks like?
 
Yeah there's going to be legal drama, but with no signed lease and defendants with no real assets it's not going to amount to much more than a bunch of histrionics and legal bills.

The bank will take its pound of flesh from Bonnie's mom, the only person with anything worth taking, and leave her credit in shambles. Most normal people would feel pretty ashamed to do this to their mother during her declining years while she battles cancer, but Paul 100% does not give a shit.
damn that transphobe mom.
 
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