F.A.Qs about Jail, State Hospital, and Court

[Cheerlead-in-Chief]

Like Jesus?

Maybe nostalgia

 

[Ophelia]

So I guess we really are never going to see Chris again?

Why do you say that? It’s not even August yet.

 

[AnOminous]

Is he gonna be tried on the “sex with own child“ charge or is there gonna be a different charge/ more charges added when he gets a trial? I still don’t understand how that applies to Chris, is Barbara mentally deemed a child and that’s why?

It's just a code the website uses for this specific statute. Presumably motherfuckers like Chris are pretty rare.

 

[LGHDR+]

What is spoiled milk but fine cheese?

Limburger maybe.

So I guess we really are never going to see Chris again?

Damn. I'll always remember him in his pink Sonichu shirt on that early August day.

That, or we finally do see him and I become traumatized.

Well, more traumatized. It's like he died but you know he's still alive. If that makes sense? I really don't have a better analogy.

Schrödinger's 'tard, indeed.

 

[King Kiwi]

Like Jesus?

Oh yah I forgot that Chris was Jesus.

He was also Sonichu and an interdimensional goddess or something.

Man is his life sad. You know he'll cling to his delusions for that's all he has.

 

[Optimus Prime]

Since that already happened, and Chris discovered that he wouldn't have to "adult" in jail, there's been no motivation on his part.

I think this might be a case of 'be careful of what you wish for because you just might get it', since while Chris doesn't have to 'adult' while in lockup, it does remove a lot of the freedom that he'd known for all his life as he spends most of the day in a jail cell.

Man is his life sad. You know he'll cling to his delusions for that's all he has.

Playing Armchair Psychologist here but I think it's a result of Chris simply having constant power fantasies like a child to be able to enact what he deems to be suitable retribution upon those who have wronged him. That he feels powerless against the cruel whims of reality - which ties into his obsession over alternate universes where he DOES have omnipotence.

Really, Chris wants to be the little shit at the center of the Twilight Zone episode 'Its a Good Life' where the kid basically fucks over an entire town with the exact kind of powers Chris wants.

It's a Good Life (The Twilight Zone) - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org

Well-adjusted people take things into their own hands and actually deal with it on our own, adapting and accepting the way things are. Chris legitimately is so spoiled that he'd rather wish for a new reality to make him God(ess) than actually change his ways.

 

[Cpt. Stud Beefpile]

The slow death of "Classic Chris" started when he trooned out, and after his arrest in August, 2021, most people have since concluded that the "Chris" we have now is a loathsome monster rather than the mere misguided idiot of yesteryear.

I would compare it to watching somebody you knew decline from a degenerative brain disease, ala the concept behind Everywhere At the End of Time. The person that they are at the end of it is unrecognizable from the person they started out as, even if they are physically still alive.

Yeah the pre-troon Chris was still some kind of horrifying, still made you thank God and your parents that you didn't turn out the same way - but actually funny in his own pathetic way. "Hey everyone bring the popcorn and come watch this guy", if you get what I mean. It was vaguely similar to watching an episode of the Three Stooges or Mat & Pat. On some level watching a Chris-grate retard do what naturally comes to retards, especially without any restrictions at all from parents or a caregiver, is and will always be funny. Especially when said tards are allowed to wander out into the world on their own. Some of the shit he used to get up to made me laugh out loud even as my jaw dropped from his complete lack of manners or social skills..

Post-troon Chris...went from funny-horrible to just horrible. It's now like watching Frankenstein's monster stumble about in broad daylight. A literal thing-that-should-not-be, clumsily pretending to be something which it isn't, and because the entire nation you live in is run by pants-on-head lunatics you can't even call the bobbies to have it dragged away to a freak farm where it belongs. Somewhere it won't frighten children with its horrid visage or cause a traffic accident when it mindlessly lurches out into the street..

I've been a Chrischanner for a fair chunk of my life but now I'm only checking in sporadically to see the final (we hope) end to this pitiable tragedy of a human being that was allowed to rip up its body for the sake of a sanctioned mental illness to add to the ones it already had.

 

[Hepativore]

@Cpt. Stud Beefpile

One hopes that mental health professionals will use this opportunity to study Chris and make as many discoveries as possible in order to prevent another Chris-Chan from ever happening again for the good of all of Mankind.

 

[Tranny Farmer]

A predditor claims to have gotten in contact with Praetor (the guy responsible for selling Chris' merch).

The whole think seems very scketchy, especially the signed tasers part. How the fuck would Chris be able go get a hold of tasers and sign them? Anyways, thought I'd post it anyways but take it with a Kripparian level of salt.

Highlights as per plebbitor:
* Praetor is selling tasers signed by Chris.
* Chris is still in contact with Praetor, and calls twice a week. He approves all items.
* Chris has not touched his money from Praetor or the tugboat; only donations. He is planning to use this money to permanently hire Heilberg, and sue a couple people.
* The jail visit didn't happen. Praetor has apparently played a part in convincing Chris not to send letters or accept visitors.
* Chris has a beard and is only allowed to shave on rare occasions.
* Chris has been writing a lot, and will apparently be out in a few months.
* Chris no longer strictly identifies as female. He's bigender.

Archive Link

Plebbit Post

 

[themarchivist2]

A predditor claims to have gotten in contact with Praetor (the guy responsible for selling Chris' merch).

The whole think seems very scketchy, especially the signed tasers part. How the fuck would Chris be able go get a hold of tasers and sign them? Anyways, thought I'd post it anyways but take it with a Kripparian level of salt.

Highlights as per plebbitor:
* Praetor is selling tasers signed by Chris.
* Chris is still in contact with Praetor, and calls twice a week. He approves all items.
* Chris has not touched his money from Praetor or the tugboat; only donations. He is planning to use this money to permanently hire Heilberg, and sue a couple people.
* The jail visit didn't happen. Praetor has apparently played a part in convincing Chris not to send letters or accept visitors.
* Chris has a beard and is only allowed to shave on rare occasions.
* Chris has been writing a lot, and will apparently be out in a few months.
* Chris no longer strictly identifies as female. He's bigender.


View attachment 4756490
Archive Link

Plebbit Post

That was me, I posted it in Random Thoughts and Questions earlier. I can provide proof the conversation happened if anyone suggests something, just not sure how else I would outside of the screenshot.

 

[A Grey Cat]

He "doesn't give a shit" about pronouns cause in jail in Virginia nobody cares. He's a man through and through I'll be the staff have been calling him my male pronouns since day 1

 

[AnOminous]

* Praetor is selling tasers signed by Chris.

And how does that work exactly?

 

[themarchivist2]

And how does that work exactly?

Praetor allegedly had multiple tasers they wanted Chris to autograph so they could sell them back in early 2021. It's very likely the tasers they're selling were autographed before Chris's arrest. They originally listed them for sale in 2022, though they say in this response that Etsy took them down, so it's possible neither of them were sold. They've sold one of these "secret items" and only have one left for sale; since only two tasers were confirmed to exist, this checks out. I don't doubt their authenticity.

I moreso question the 'authentic medallions' since they've been up for so long, though I'm not 100% on those being fake either. Praetor has charged dozens of Christorians hundreds of dollars for these items, and they have partial doxxes public; if it turned out their items were inauthentic, those buyers would be coming for their necks, and I think they know this.

 

[Hopkinsville Goblin]

How the fuck would Chris be able go get a hold of tasers and sign them?

You can just buy them off the Internet. There's a pizza place near me that sells them. They also sell cheap folding knives and Egyptian cotton sheets.

 

[Debbie Macomber]

* Chris has not touched his money from Praetor or the tugboat; only donations. He is planning to use this money to permanently hire Heilberg, and sue a couple people.

If Chris stockpiled enough to pay Heilberg a retainer, he might actually LOSE him as a public defender. The Miranda warning says "If you cannot afford an attorney one will be appointed for you"

So if Chris saved up enough to pay Heilberg, he'd have to pay Heilberg for THIS case. Perhaps Chris misunderstood and what he really has to save up for is Heilberg depleting all his stockpiled tugboat.

Even if Chris could pay a retainer, I doubt Heilberg would take him on as a client again after all this. Enemy numero uno would be Null, and Chris wouldn't even be able to coherently tell him the facts of the case.
"Judas Null made me do all those Sonichu drawings to go to Everfree Northwest which is like Babscon which was like Bronycon but I digress, and then he got me arrested by lying and telling the police I stole $600 from Barb when I just BARROWED it without asking, and then he stole $4000 from me by giving it back to the backers AFTER I did all those drawings because Everfree banned me. He's one of the toxic minority that will be left behind because I'm Jesus Christ Chan!"
I can't imagine any respected lawyer opening a case over that

 

[Male Idiot]

It is also possible they just took Chris's signature, made a paper cutout and copied it.

 

[Sorades]

Its amazing how few people on here even question if he was just making shit up. even if true he was clearly manipulated. the issue is this could have been prevented & his brother & family should take the blame for not watching over him better.

Why would his siblings watch over him? Barb is a horrible mom and Chris is a lunatic, why would Cole have to endure them any longer than he already did? Chris' other brother is a doctor and his sister is a or at least was a federal employee. Why would respectable people like them help Chris, who's lost in his delusions?

 

[Jason Wynn]

Its amazing how few people on here even question if he was just making shit up. even if true he was clearly manipulated. the issue is this could have been prevented & his brother & family should take the blame for not watching over him better.

Why should it be their responsibility to babysit a grown man who refuses to grow up and take responsibility for himself? Cole is a douche, but his 41 year old mommy rapist half brother isn’t his concern. Same with David and whatever his sister’s name is.

This is the problem with a lot of people anymore, everyone is so narcissistic that they can’t conceive of ever being in the wrong, it’s always someone else’s fault, which is such bullshit. This isn’t like if Chris was a small child and needed his siblings to watch him for a few hours while Barb and Bob were at work, or hold his hand while crossing the street. At some point you have to cut your losses and show “tough love” by letting the fuck up hit rock bottom. Most fuck ups when they reach that point will come to some kind of realization and start making changes. Chris is a lost cause and the only one responsible for his life is himself.

 

[Cheerlead-in-Chief]

Why should it be their responsibility to babysit a grown man who refuses to grow up and take responsibility for himself? Cole is a douche, but his 41 year old mommy rapist half brother isn’t his concern. Same with David and whatever his sister’s name is.

This is the problem with a lot of people anymore, everyone is so narcissistic that they can’t conceive of ever being in the wrong, it’s always someone else’s fault, which is such bullshit. This isn’t like if Chris was a small child and needed his siblings to watch him for a few hours while Barb and Bob were at work, or hold his hand while crossing the street. At some point you have to cut your losses and show “tough love” by letting the fuck up hit rock bottom. Most fuck ups when they reach that point will come to some kind of realization and start making changes. Chris is a lost cause and the only one responsible for his life is himself.

The other sister's name is Carol she was also good at math
It seems that part of Bob's genes lived on besides the autism.
She also didn't attend Bob's funeral and Chris made a Mii out of her as a Janecop in that "FAMILY NEEDS TO SUPPORT FAMILY" (Specifically Barb)
"Rock Bottom" physically, but according to his drawings, he's deep in the Ashkatic Records and sticking it to da trolls and Kiwi Farms and praying it dies horrifically.

 

[Jason Wynn]

no the problem is you a neurotypical with a vendetta to demonize chris. he is disabled you idiot. comprehend wtf that means. that means he will hit rock bottom without support from his family. the only lesson learned is that disabled people hit rock bottom without help. you dont have a logical argument.

lol, it makes sense now. Give your parents my apologies, must be tough on them having to deal with a burden like you.